Other books by Iyanla Vanzant
Living Through the Meantime
Acts of Faith
The Value in the Valley
Faith in the Valley
One Day My Soul Just Opened Up
In the Meantime
Dont Give It Away!
Yesterday, I Cried
This book is dedicated to my big sister
Her Royal Highness Leola Iyalu Oredola Opeodu; and Edna Hassell and Grady Owens, whose spirits live in my heart forever.
And to:
Those on the journey to truth and wholeness;
those who started the journey but found a reason to stop;
those who want to begin the journey but don't know how to start;
those who have questions about the journey that they are afraid to ask;
those whose spirits are willing to take the journey but whose flesh has issues;
those who have taken the journey and are willing to do it again.
To us all, may our paths be lit with God's love.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
I am humbly grateful that I have been entrusted with and assigned the awesome task of re-minding Gods children of how divine we are. I have learned, step-by-step, how to stop expecting the worst; to stop trying to live up to the expectations of others; to listen to my heart; and most of all, that I really am okay right now. I admit, I have not always been a good student. Many times, I did not do my homework, tried to cheat on a test, copied from someone elses life or showed up late or unpreparedsometimes, both! I acknowledge that, more often than not, I learned my lessons kicking and screaming, denying and resisting. Many days, I had to sit in the corner. Many times, I have had to repeat a class. I will be the first to admit that my blessings, brilliance and good fortune rest squarely on the shoulders of my teachers. To each of you, for your patience, faith and refusal to give up on me, I am humbly grateful:
To my Children and Wisdom Council, Damon, Alex, Gemmia and Nisa, I want to be a better listener!
To my grandchildren, Oluwa, Niamoja, Adesola and Asole, you are my sunshine!
My husband and best friend, Adeyemi Bandele, just five more miles! You drive!
My best friend and spiritual sister, Shaheerah Stephens, aint no mountain high enough!
My prayer partners who continually hold me in the light, Raina Bundy, Sarah Porter, Rev. Chester Berryhill and Vivian Berryhill, I just cant tell it all!
The Little People: Simone, Devon, Damali, you always have the kisses when I need them!
My big brothers, Rev. Jeremiah Wright and Rev. Willie Wilson, your genius is showing!
My ever-ready assistant, Bernadette Griggs, I owe you!
My patient editor, Trish Todd, Im not making any more promises!
My very own Maestro, Kenneth L. Browning, just an old-fashioned love song!
To Miss Daisy, Erika Conner, for her persistent diligence toward stepping into her Bigness.
And to all those whose work and spirit have taught me how to Be:
Oprah Winfrey, Susan Taylor, Paul Ferinni, Marianne Williamson, John Roger, Andrew Weil, Neale Donald Walsh, Norm Frye, Ron Hulnick, Mary Hulnick, Sharon Heyward, Patti Webster, Donald Lawrence, L. Barrett Tyson, Louis and Kevin Hutt, Vivian and Ray Chew, the family at Harmony Records, the students of the University of Santa Monica, Rev. Floyd Flake, Rev. June Juliette Gatlin, the Angels of Inner Visions: Almasi, Adara, Ahmed, Candance, Cochise, Danni, Doyle, Ebun, James, Janet, Judith, Rev. John, Larcenia, LaTonya, LaQuita, Lucille, Lydia, Maia, Maxine, Muhsinah, Sherman, Viviana, Yawfah and to all the others who have sent prayers and blessings my way. Finally, a very special thank you to my sister-mother, friend and prayer warrior, Helen Jones, for you know what!
CONTENTS
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If by chance no one has told you that they love you today, I would be honored to be the first to say, I love you today! I love you because you are and have been so willing to grow. And my how you have grown! Youve grown from struggling to searching. From trying to do to learning how to do. Youve grown from fear to having faith, to demonstrating your courage. You have grown in many ways, consistently demonstrating your willingness and courage to take the next stepthe step toward the profound and divine wisdom buried within yourself. The step toward knowing more about yourself. This is exactly why I love youyou are so profoundly divine.
Growth is a very profound experience. It can be beautiful and ugly, empowering and confining, thought-provoking and mind-boggling, pleasant and unpleasant, all at the same time. Just when you think youve got it, life seems to say, Well, now take this! And you do. Then, the minute you are ready to throw your hands up, give up or beat up on yourself for doing the same thing in the same way and ending up in the same place again, you realize you havent done so badly after all. You know you have grown when you can meet a challenge, an obstacle or a difficulty without totally losing it. Somehow, someway in the growth process, you have come upon the understanding that the more you grow, the more you know, the more you are encouraged to grow and know.
There is more of you waiting to unfold. There is more about the world you desire to understand. There are more people coming into your life, and you are gaining more knowledge about yourself through your experiences with them. There is so much more, so much new information coming your way that you are continually being reminded that you owe it to yourself to do all you can to prepare yourself to receive these new insights. There is also so much more wealth, well-being, peace and joy waiting for you, and, because I love you, I want the very best for you. Offering you this book is a demonstration of my support as you prepare for the work and blessings that are to come.
I want to tell you a story. You know I always have to tell at least one story, and this is it. In preparing for an upcoming event, I gave my team what I thought was a simple assignment. You see, you cannot teach what you have not experienced. I asked each person, each potential teacher, to write a five-hundred-word description of themselves, using the first person, in the present tense. I had faith that these powerful and loving individuals, with whom I have worked for over seven years, would take the task in stride. What we learned in the process was profoundly healing for us all.
As we sat to review each response, my team members shared with me the overwhelming feelings, even fears, they had experienced while completing the assignment. I know from experience that examining yourself, what you do and how you feel, can be one of the most challenging and frightening things you will ever face in life. To then share that information with others is the stuff that fried brain matter is made of. Yet my team members understood that the journey into self-acceptance and self-love must begin with self-examination. We all also understood that until you take the journey of self-reflection, it is almost impossible to grow or learn in life.
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