Barbara Want - Baby Secrets: How to Know Your Babys Needs

Jo Tantum and Barbara Want

BABY SECRETS

How to know your babys needs

Published by the Penguin Group
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First published 2005

Copyright Jo Tantum and Barbara Want, 2005

The moral right of the authors has been asserted

All rights reserved.

ISBN: 978-0-141-90211-1

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Barbara

For me, becoming a parent was like discovering an extra drawer in a faithful old cupboard full of magical wonders I never knew existed.

In my innocence I assumed that along with the baby or, in my case, babies would come those natural instincts, as reliable as mothers milk, telling me what to do next. But they were nowhere to be found. And that meant that when my boys cried (which they did frequently) I had no idea why, nor what to do about it. I didnt know how to feed or bath them, let alone how to avoid the path, trodden by so many others I knew, of round-the-clock feeding and sleepless nights stretching ahead across the months. And years

I felt the stirrings of panic. Why hadnt the hospital given me an instruction manual along with the welcome pack? Was I capable of organizing this new life, in particular without sleep?

And then I met Jo.

Jos understanding of babies, not to mention parents need for reassurance and guidance, is second to none. She made promises I dared not believe but badly needed to hear. She said she would instil in me the confidence to understand my babies needs and how to meet them. She promised order where chaos loomed. She told me my boys would thrive on this and soon be sleeping through the night.

Im glad I believed her; she delivered on everything.

Jos methods are not rocket science. They are straightforward and really easy for any parent to follow. She doesnt have a magic wand. But her methods work; they are flexible, kind to babies and very kind to their poor frazzled parents.

My boys loved the routines Jo showed us, and we slipped into them easily. I began to enjoy looking after two new babies, I got some control back over my life and we all loved the fact that the boys slept through the night at three months and still do.

It was while Jo and I were sitting down over one of our many cups of tea talking about the wonders of routines and sleep that we came up with the idea for Baby Secrets. Between us we felt we could offer a unique combination: an expert in babycare and a parent who had tested out her methods.

We will help you decide what to buy (and what to avoid) before your baby arrives, and give you guidance on what to do in the first few days after your baby is born. You will find advice on getting your baby into a feeding routine once you and he are ready to embark on one, and there is a step-by-step guide towards the Holy Grail of parenting: getting your baby to sleep through the night. And because things dont always go smoothly, the book offers solutions to the difficulties every parent encounters along the way. Parents worry endlessly about their babies health so there is a quick guide to common baby ailments, as well as some of the (sometimes embarrassing) ailments that afflict a mum after shes given birth. Weve included a chapter on twins and some tips on how to help older siblings cope with a new arrival, advice on travelling with a baby and a few ideas on where to look for help with your baby, if you need to.

Most of it is common sense, but common sense is what parents need. They also need faith. We want to share that faith with you.

Jo

I was fourteen when my cousin Laura was born; she was gorgeous and I was hooked. I spent all my spare time and all my school holidays with her, changing her nappy, bathing her and begging to feed her. When her brother Marcus arrived, I did the same. I soon realized what I wanted to do in my life I wanted to take care of babies. On the childcare courses that followed I flew through the exams, almost without trying; the answers seemed to come instinctively. I loved the placements I did with babies and the babies seemed to love me too.

After qualifying with my NNEB I worked in nurseries and baby units before getting my first job as a maternity nurse for newborn twins. I started by observing their sleeping and feeding patterns and then used the information to work out a routine for them. The sense of satisfaction I felt as the babies slipped happily into it was amazing and even greater was the sense of achievement I felt when I got them to sleep through the night. Their mother was overjoyed too and I realized I had found my vocation

Ive never looked back. Ive cared for many babies (and their parents) over the years and it is still my passion. It never ceases to amaze me though how such a tiny creature can cause such mayhem and so quickly; a household that is organized and calm can descend into chaos in days. The biggest mistake parents make is to try a hundred and one different things in the hope that one of them will keep the baby happy or asleep. Sadly, this usually ends up confusing the baby and can make him frantic with frustration.

I understand what a daunting task it can be for parents to look after a baby, not to mention the huge responsibility they feel. So what I show them is done with sympathy and understanding. My job is to give them the confidence and skills they need both to care for their baby and to understand him. Once you know his needs whether its milk, sleep or a cuddle you are on the way to having a happy baby and to being a confident and happy parent.