Allison Gilbert - Mothers Have Needs Too

Author

Photographer

Copyright 2013 Allison Gilbert, LMFT

First Published using Papyrus, 2013

This book may be purchased for educational, business, or sales promotional use. For more information, contact Allison Gilbert at 831-425-4475 or workofheart@gmail.com

Disclaimer: While every precaution has been taken in the preparation of this book, the publisher and author assume no responsibility for errors or omissions, or for damages resulting from the use of the information contained herein. The author has referenced books, organizations, professionals and websites but is not a spokesperson for any of them. The opinions expressed here are the opinions of the author of this book and not necessarily the opinions of the authors of other books or organizations or websites or professionals referenced here. Links to books might connect to my Amazon affiliate links and are there to support the publishing of this book.

Motherhood is a 24/7 occupation with no bathroom breaks. Allison Gilbert, LMFT validates those feelings about motherhood that no one ever talks about. Included in her tips for mother's self-care are gorgeous photos of exotic flowers. These words and photos soothe and support the most important time in a woman's life - new motherhood.

This book is dedicated

to all of the mommies who've invited me

into their hearts.

Maggie Muir, LMFT, IBCLC was so kind to call me after I sent her my Mothers Have Needs Too workshop flyer. She helped rebuild my sense of myself as a therapist when I was first starting out again after my 10 year hiatus. I learned so much from volunteering and being able to watch her lead the Wellness Group at Sutter Hospital in Santa Cruz. The article on postpartum depression benefited tremendously from my request for her edit suggestions.

Catherine Myers and the nonprofit organization Family and Home Network graciously allowed me to use their Transitioning Home Discussion Group workbooks to lead my own classes. In addition, Cathy gave me permission to include, and helped me edit the article called, "Rewriting Your Job Description" about the Discussion Group. Her support and encouragement are greatly appreciated.

Doris Leavitt, LCSW was my inspiration for the article titled, "Healthy Communication". I will be forever grateful to her for giving me the handout she made for her own clients with wonderful cartoons diagramming the Sandwich Technique.

Yochanon and Baily Friedman gifted me with Shabbos rest and prayers for my children. They have shown me the benefits of a life lived with lots of children. I am indebted to Chabad by the Sea for contributing unknowingly to ideas scattered throughout this book and to the concepts I promote in my therapy practice.

Sharol Raifaisen has always been a steadfast friend through thick and thin. For a long time she was the only one who validated my vulnerability during pregnancy and postpartum. I am so grateful to her for that and for the many tips she's given me about being a stay-at-home mom - especially the tip for cleaning the kitchen each night to start fresh in the morning!

Rosie Friedman is a 2nd mom to me and has taught me what it looks like to be a good friend. She is a mother who puts her family responsibilities above everything else in life and reminds me to use my healthy communication. She encouraged me to publish this book in paperback.

My husband, Geoffrey Gilbert has been my backbone throughout all of my most difficult passages in life, describing my journey as "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger". I have much gratitude to him for being such a solid presence in my life.

My kids have given me the greatest gift of all - the joy and love I feel on a daily basis for "just" being their mother. The nachas I get from who they are is eternal.

My parents have blessed me with Life, knowing that anytime I need them, they will be there for me. Their love and support has been a mainstay.

And last but not least, thanks to HaShem for redirecting me whenever I fall.

Thank you for being the beautiful light you are in the world! I am so happy new mothers get to sit and be nurtured by your lovingkindness. ~Maggie Muir, LMFT, IBCLC

"I will forever be grateful to you for helping me find the tools to get what I need out of my relationship, as well as my life. It makes me so sad to remember how harsh and unforgiving of myself I was before I met you. You have helped me understand that loving myself unconditionally is not only important for my own health, but is also the best thing I can do for my family. And for that we all thank you!" ~from a new mother

Thanks so much for the great session. Your soothing words and perfect questions made it all wonderful. We feel like we.are on the mend. ~ from a mother with an adult child

"Thanks for everything. You have been such a great help! My husband told me that he thinks this is the best we have ever done." - from a mother of a preschooler and a toddler

"I wanted to just say thank you for today's session. I've been so depressed and I feel better after our talk. I know there will be ups and downs as I go through this and I'm not "fixed," but I do feel a lot better, and I just wanted to be sure to thank you for your time, kindness and presence, which are so comforting." - from the adult daughter of a mother with mental illness

"Thanks for being such a great therapist. You have helped me in ways others never were able to." - from the adult daughter of an absent father

Allison Gilbert, LMFT is a psychotherapist residing in Santa Cruz, California. Her articles have appeared in numerous publications, including the newspapers, "Growing Up in Santa Cruz", "Santa Cruz Sentinel" and "JValley News" which is published by the Jewish Federation of Silicon Valley. Allison's job as a therapist was put on hold for 10 years while she worked full-time as a stay-at-home mom. She has been back to work as a therapist part-time since 2005 and sees clients in her office and through phone and live video conferencing.

Geoffrey Gilbert is married to Allison Gilbert and writes a funny weekly photo blog on his website, SunriseSantaCruz.com. Geoff keeps Allison laughing and enjoying his wonderful sunrise photos captured in the wee hours of the morning while she's still sleeping. He contributed his lovely flower photos for this book.