Sarah Woodhouse - Best Beginnings for your Baby and You: Conception, Pregnancy, Birth and Looking Ahead

Copyright 2019 Sarah Woodhouse

The moral right of the author has been asserted.
Logo, cover design and typesetting by Rebecca Maun

Apart from any fair dealing for the purposes of research or private study, or criticism or review, as permitted under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988, this publication may only be reproduced, stored or transmitted, in any form or by any means, with the prior permission in writing of the publishers, or in the case of reprographic reproduction in accordance with the terms of licences issued by the Copyright Licensing Agency. Enquiries concerning reproduction outside those terms should be sent to the publishers.

The information and advice presented in this e-book has been reviewed and approved by medical doctors and childcare professionals. It should not, however, substitute for the advice of your own doctor or trained healthcare professional. You are advised to consult with them with regard to all matters that may require medical attention or diagnosis. The publisher and author specifically disclaim any responsibility for any risk which may be claimed or incurred as a consequence of the practice of anything presented in this book.

See www.right-from-the-start.org for details of further
Right from the Start books, products and parent support.

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ISBN 978 1838599 348

British Library Cataloguing in Publication Data.
A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.

Matador is an imprint of Troubador Publishing Ltd

This book is dedicated to Emma Barlow,
whose loving energy, joy and vision inspired me to start writing.

Her faith and courage shone out for all who knew her.

She died on 22 January 2003 aged thirty-two.

Right from the Starts logo of the Dolphin and Child comes from the 18 foot bronze statue by David Wynne on Londons Chelsea Embankment, by the River Thames.

The child and dolphin playing together symbolises the trust, love, adventure and sense of unity in all creation which each of us should be able to understand and enjoy and share with each other from earliest childhood to the end of our lives.

Contents

APPENDICES

Acknowledgements

Many people have been involved in the planning and drafting of this book, some people perhaps without knowing it.

For their extraordinary knowledge, wisdom and humanity and the support and encouragement they have given me, my deepest gratitude must go to Dr Joseph Chilton Pearce, Dr Frank Lake, Nim Barnes at Foresight and Anna Verwaal. Special thanks to Anna midwife, birth educator and birth photographer for her sensitive and intimate sepia photographs.

The brilliant minds and loving energy of these people have motivated and taught me so much over many years as the Helping Parents Shine Right from the Start project developed, and this book was being drafted.

Warmest gratitude to Maggie Howell whose birth preparation support and natal hypnotherapy gives such comfort to mothers. And to Dr Rosie Knowles who set up and runs the Sheffield Sling Surgery. Her advice and help in drafting the chapter on babywearing and providing the photographs for this chapter have been outstanding.

I am warmly indebted to Sheila Kitzinger, Andrew Chevalier, Phillipa Howell (Homeopath), Melanie Cook, Harvey Karp and Margo Sunderland for their stimulation and help. I would like to thank Sheila Kitzinger in particular for her original permission to draw anything from her book, Being Born, including some of the photographs of a babys development in the womb by Lennart Nilsson.

I thank the Brain Gym Foundation UK for permission to describe some simplified Brain Gym exercises in .

I have also drawn gratefully from the research findings of Jaak Panksepp, Alan Stone, Joseph E. LeDoux and Christopher Walsh at the Boston Childrens Hospital.

Perhaps most importantly, my heartfelt thanks must go to all the parents, grandparents, midwives, health visitors, family friends, neighbours and generous strangers who shared their experiences, their feelings and their hopes with me. Their stories and descriptions are what truly bring this book to life and make it a shared endeavour.

Special thanks also to Deirdre Youngs and Patrick Tomlinson for their editing expertise. Deirdre has been a matchless adviser and co-author as well as editor. Her continuous, loyal support and involvement throughout have been a source of creative inspiration and joy to me. Final and warm gratitude also to Nol Riley and Caroline Bushell for their devoted efforts to perfect and polish the manuscript and bring it all together so well.

Sarah Woodhouse

Introduction

If we hope to create

a non-violent world

where respect and kindness

replace fear and hatred

We must begin

with how we treat each other

at the beginning of life.

For that is where

our deepest patterns are set.

From these roots

grow fear and alienation

or love and trust.

Suzanne Arms

I DIDNT KNOW ANY BABIES WHEN I WAS GROWING UP!

More people than ever before go through their own childhood without ever holding a baby in their arms or helping a toddler walk and talk. This can be a disadvantage when you find yourself expecting your first child.

This Best Beginnings book is for reading before your child is born, ideally before or as soon as you conceive. Keep it nearby so you can re-read any part of it which you feel might help you. Share those pages with your midwife and someone close to you.

I cant imagine what it would be like having a baby to think about all the time, every single day. I mean, I wouldnt know where to start. It could drive you mad!

Karen

Best Beginnings for Your Baby and You is a friendly, comforting, stand-in when you need it and there is no one close by to help you.

This book is full of pictures, shared stories and experiences to remind us that we are all in this together, doing our best to be good parents, needing to learn from each other and help each other. This puts into perspective, and helps us cope with, those difficulties which life may throw at us.

This book is not just for expectant and new parents, grandparents and helpful and friendly neighbours. It is also for midwives and health visitors in training or at work and everyone else involved in any way with mothers and their babies from the very beginning.

It is written to be a bridge, allowing a greater flow of understanding and trust between all these people so that confidence, happiness and gentle, nurturing skills can build in young families, right from the start, even when lifes circumstances are difficult. This will deeply affect the way a childs personality, spirit and love of others will blossom during childhood and the rest of his life.