Michael A. Pesola - Tales from the Job Site

Tales from the Job Site

A Frustrated Contractor Confesses

By

Michael A. Pesola

2016 by Michael A. Pesola:

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system or transmitted in any form or by any means without the prior written permission of the publishers, except by a reviewer who may quote brief passages in a review to be printed in a newspaper, magazine or journal.

First printing

All characters in this book are fictitious, and any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental.

ISBN: 978-1-329-90630-3

eISBN: 978-1-943-76786-1

This book is dedicated to my father and mother, Jack and Marie, who through their guidance and love have given me the tools necessary to succeed in life. Every day that passes only makes me realize how fortunate I am.

Acknowledgment

Many thanks to my loving wife Sara who tirelessly processed this book on the computer and offered prudent advice when needed.

Foreword

These stories are not meant to offend anyone. They are written merely to enlighten the reader to the intricacies of remodel work. Remodeling has long since overtaken new construction in dollars spent; therefore, it stands to reason that many contractors and homeowners out there have a story to tell. These stories can take many forms, from horror, to comedy, to yes, even success stories.

My father taught my brothers and me most of what we know. He instilled in us a moral code that helped us to distinguish right from wrong and he taught us how to do things right the first time. God bless him, he is still with us teaching and guiding, albeit more now by example and nuance.

My father used to say to me, Son, Ive forgotten more than youve already learned. As I think back on those words, they couldnt ring more true. In our business, as in life, several truths are clear:

The remodeling business is a constant learning process.

The remodeling business can be equally stressful for the homeowner and the contractor.

Remodeling is like a chess game. Anyone can move, its finishing that counts.

If youre going to do somethinganythingdo it right.

In the end, if these stories entertain you or provoke some thought during your remodel project, or if you can find some humor in the whole process, then I guess the book was worth it.

Michael A. Pesola

Introduction

Much has been made over the years about the sorry state of general contractors; their abuses, their bad name, etcetera, etcetera. It has been widely reported in television exposs, newspapers, and magazine articles that contractors lack integrity and are responsible for numerous atrocities in the world including, but not limited to: overcharging the customer; receiving large draws and then abandoning the job; sloppy work; creating leaks and mold; instigator of any malfunctions in the home, including drywall cracks and broken appliances; and use of low-quality products. Im sure you get the picture. (If you dont you must be living in a vacuum, or you frequently take on water in a very dark place with rich soil like a mushroom.) Anyway, the funny thing is that many contractors go totally unreported. You dont hear about them unless some client talks about the great quality work they performed or how they completed a project on time. These contractors dont even have to advertise! These are the contractors that this book is written for. The following stories all reflect the contractors view on a profession that is taxing, complicated, and never boring.

Let me transport you to a nearby planet where five contractors can bid a project and no two bids will be close in price. Come with me to a world where husbands and wives argue about a project when only one of them even wanted to start. A strange world where red can be green, and linoleum costs the same as marble tile. Many times on this world, one gets the feeling of being watched, perhaps by visitors from another planet, filming us for their version of a dysfunctional reality show.

If these stories sound familiar, remember, youre not alone out there.

This book of short stories is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are the product of the authors imagination or are used fictitiously.

Any resemblance to actual events, locales, or persons living or dead is coincidental.

MP

Contents

A few years ago, we were remodeling a bathroom for a nice lady using high-end plumbing fixturesa state-of-the-art spa, beautiful expensive porcelain tile, and a 3/8-inch-thick glass frameless shower door.

In a bathroom remodel, some of the last items installed are the plumbing fixtures, such as the sinks, faucets, toilet, the shower controls, and the showerhead. The sink faucets, shower valve, and showerhead in this case had what the manufacturer called an oil-rubbed bronze finish and the four pieces combined cost over $900.

After the fixtures were installed, the plumber turned on the mixer valve control and ran some water through the showerhead to test it. The next day the owner asked me to come into the bathroom. She pointed at the mixer valve control under the showerhead where there were what appeared to be water spots on the bronze finish (obviously caused by drips from the showerhead above) and said, What can we do about these spots, Mick, they look horrible?

I replied, Quite frankly I dont know, Mary, weve never installed products with this type of finish before. Ill call my plumbing supplier and get a phone number for the manufacturer and see what they say.

After a few calls I reached the manufacturer and asked what the process was for removing these water spots. My thinking was (1) it was obvious the fixtures would have to get wet at some point, and (2) there must be a manual or instructions for caring for such an expensive investment. After all, why pay that kind of money for a product that spotted so easily?

Not so. The company rep explained that this was a hand-rubbed finish and one should avoid getting the fixtures wet. Incredible! I wondered what would happen when Mary washed her face for the first time and then turned off the faucet with wet hands.

I asked the rep, How are you going to keep water off a valve that is directly under a showerhead, not to mention splashing off someones body? but I received no good answer. To make a long story short, Mary learned to live with her bronze fixtures.

Maybe, she said, these fixtures are only supposed to be for show and not for actual use. (Another case of learning by experience.)

A few years ago, one of my brothers was preparing to solder a mixer valve and showerhead in a customers bath. As is the custom with many plumbers, all the copper was dry fitted together with the valve and the showerhead piece in place. This would ensure a good fit prior to the more permanent soldering of the pipes. The customer, Al, as was his fashion, hunkered in close to my brother in the confines of the bath, looking over his shoulder. After my brother had finished the preparations, he walked into another room to get some soldering equipment. When he returned he found an empty void where the valve had been sitting. The customer, Al, a highly inquisitive fellow, had removed it and was studying the fixture in another room.

Much later in the day after my brother had shared this unique episode with me, I approached Als wife.

Sally, I said, do you mind if we purchase a saddle for this project?

She look puzzled, Why, whatever for?

So we can strap it on my brother Tonys back so Al can ride him around the job.

Sally was silent for a good ten seconds; not a good sign.

Finally, she burst out laughing, Thats my Al!

Message delivered.

Often at the beginning of a workday, I dole out directions or instructions to the lead men. Usually I make diary notes or scribble them on my weekly schedule sheet. I trust my memory, but I think I will always be a paper person. Periodically I would check on a particular employee to see the fruits of his labor under my direction. From time to time, it became apparent that in some instances, the work wasnt being completed to my specifications. On this particular morning, I had just finished telling Joe what was wrong with his work. What follows is a loose translation.