Darlene Miller - More RV Chuckles and Chuckholes: More Confessions of Happy Campers

My cell phone rang one Saturday morning with the request that I participate in a survey for an RV national organization. After taking my name and address, the telemarketer asked what my hobbies are.

I answered, Reading, writing, singing, reenacting, exploring nature, photographing wild animals, visiting historical places

The man on the phone interrupted, You sightsee.

Duh. Is there an RVer who doesnt sightsee? I was too polite to say it out loud.

Am I going too fast for you? I asked.

Actually, I dont have boxes for the other things you said.

Boxes, what boxes? RVers are very different from each other. How do we fit in boxes?

What do you have in your boxes? I queried.

He answered, Sightseeing, hunting, ATVing, fishing, jetskiing, water-crafting, motorcycling, dirt-bike riding, skiing, snowmobiling, golfing, birding, going to dog shows and horse shows, and attending RV shows and rallies.

Since I wouldnt have listed any of his words in the boxes as my hobbies, I said goodbye and hung up the phone.

Get real! Who created these boxes? Was he gathering information for his thesis or someone in marketing? It must have been someone who has only been on weekend camping trips. They hurry to a destination and hurry home. Most serious RVers, both snowbirds and full-timers, want to explore and experience RVing.

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This book is a humorous collection of jokes and anecdotes from my experiences in full-timing for ten years and those of other RVers who are full- or parttime RVing. The chuckles are the fun things we do and the chuckholes are the anecdotes that are not funny until later when you relate them to other RVers.

Most RVers are friendly people. They automatically have something in common with other RVers. They ask, Where have you been? Where are you going? You can tell a parttime RVer because they ask, Where is your home?

Home is where many RVers go to get a medical checkup or med fix. I went to a doctor in Iowa, a dentist in Alaska and an optometrist in Arizona. In the summer we have an address in Alaska, otherwise our address is in Texas. I have a library card from the Anchorage Municipal Libraries. We have children in North Carolina, Iowa, Texas and Alaska. Our RV is registered and licensed in Texas. Because of this, we have drivers licenses in Texas. But sometimes I have a problem knowing where I am from.

Home is where you park it is a common expression that RVers use. I still get surprised when family members understand this.

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My parents had a 65th wedding anniversary in 2006. Naturally, mother wanted all the children to attend the festivities. Terry and I were parked in Alaska at our sons home. We decided that I would fly to Iowa to attend the celebration. My mom gave the information about the anniversary to the Oskaloosa Herald. When I read the article, I saw that Terry and I were from Alaska.

Mom, I queried, I did not know that Im from Alaska.

You say that where your RV is parked is where your home is. She reminded me.

Okay, mom.

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While in Iowa, I decided to spend time with my son Mark and his family. Mark, when is a good time to see you? I asked.

Meet us at church and well spend the afternoon together, he answered.

When I arrived at the church, I expected to sit with the family, but Mark was sitting with the choir and his wife, Connie, was working in the nursery. I saw my grandson, Joshua, sitting with some youngsters.

Can I sit by you? I asked.

Sure, grandma. Joshua answered.

The minister said, I see that we have some visitors today. If you know a visitor, give us their name and where they are from.

Joshua stood up and said, This is Grandma. (like I had no other name.)

She is from wherever she wants to be.

The church was silent. The minister repeated, Her name is Grandma and she is from wherever she wants to be.