Sarah McLean - Pink Is the New Black: Healing the Hidden Scars of Breast Cancer: A Journey from Grief to Grace

My FamilySteve, Colin, and Tatum

I thank my family for being my biggest cheerleaders. Without your love and support, I wouldnt have been able to walk through this journey. Thank you for being patient with me and giving me the grace to accomplish a major life goal: becoming a published author. I love you!

Dave Lambert

Thank you to Dave Lambert. Youve been my editor, encourager, and coach through the past year and a half. From the very beginning of this process, Ive been scared to tackle such an emotionally challenging project, but you have given me direction, counsel, and the courage to keep going. Youre a godsend!

Somersault TeamJeannette Taylor, Cindy Lambert, and Joe Sherman

Thank you, guys, for being my guiding light throughout this process. Youve given me the strength and confidence to share my story with the world. Because of your wisdom and leadership, I believe womens lives will be forever changed!

Project31 BoardJane Wilson, Dawn Harth, Caitlin Grassmyer, Melissa Craft, Michelle Garrett, and Nick Brown

Youre only as strong as the team you put around you. My board has been by my side every step of the way. Thank you for your support and your belief in our vision!

Craig Groeschel

I was Craigs personal assistant for over eight years. Thank you, Craig, for your leadership, integrity, and passion and for never allowing fear to get in the way of accomplishing your dreams. Youve been a tremendous example to me to swing for the fence!

Lisa Bevere

You are a spiritual mother to so many women. Thank you for investing in and believing in me. Your passion, strength, and sass are intoxicating. I want to be you when I grow up!

Joanna and Michael Smitty Smith

Thank you for believing in me! Your investment in my development has been life changing. Without your guidance, insight, and willingness to take a chance on me, I wouldnt be where I am today!

Well, thats new, I thought. Hot water splashed down my back, and the smell of eucalyptus body wash filled the steamy air. The morning news on the Today Show from the TV in our bedroom mumbled faintly.

It was a cool morning in November of 2002. I stood in the shower of our new apartment in Oklahoma City, doing a breast exam. With my right arm resting on my head, I gently pressed the fingertips of my left hand against the tissue throughout the area of my right breast, from collarbone to armpit. I knew exactly what my tissue should feel like because Id been doing self-exams regularly for seven yearssince Id turned eighteen and my doctor had encouraged them and taught me to do them the right way. They were surprisingly easy, and doing them gave me a sense of empowerment over my own health. I did them faithfullyeven though, honestly, I didnt think I really needed them. My chest was so smallbarely an A cup. Id always thought that women with fuller breasts were more susceptible to cancer and other related illnesses. In fact, I thought it would be practically impossible for me to get breast cancer.

A chill of worry washed over me.
Should I be concerned about this?
Surely it wasnt cancer.

That morning, I explored the area as I always didwith my mind mostly on the days activities. But this time was different. My fingertips told me that something had changed. My mind abruptly forgot about making my to-do list and paid attention. I paused, then my fingers inspected the area just above my nipple again with deeper pressure, and again with even deeper pressure. I thought I felt something therea change from normal. But I wasnt sure. A chill of worry washed over me. Should I be concerned about this? Surely it wasnt cancer.