Grenny Joseph - Crucial conversations: tools for talking when stakes are high

PRAISE FOR CRUCIAL CONVERSATIONS

Relationships are the priority of life, and conversations are the crucial element in profound caring of relationships. This book helps us to think about what we really want to say. If you want to succeed in both talking and listening, read this book.

Dr. Lloyd J. Ogilvie, chaplain, United States Senate

Important, lucid, and practical, Crucial Conversations is a book that will make a difference in your life. Learn how to flourish in every difficult situation.

Robert E. Quinn, ME Tracy Collegiate Professor of
OBHRM, University of Michigan Business School

I was personally and professionally inspired by this bookand Im not easily impressed. In the fast-paced world of IT, the success of our systems, and our business, depends on crucial conversations we have every day. Unfortunately, because our environment is so technical, far too often we forget about the human systems that make or break us. These skills are the missing foundation piece.

Maureen Burke, manager of training,
Coca-Cola Enterprises, Inc.

The book is compelling. Yes, I found myself in too many of their examples of what not to do when caught in these worst-of-all-worlds situations! GET THIS BOOK, WHIP OUT A PEN AND GET READY TO SCRIBBLE MARGIN NOTES FURIOUSLY, AND PRACTICE, PRACTICE, PRACTICE THE INVALUABLE TOOLS THESE AUTHORS PRESENT. I know I didand it helped me salvage several difficult situations and repair my damaged self-esteem in others. I will need another copy pretty soon, as Im wearing out the pages in this one!

James Belasco, best-selling author of Flight of the Buffalo, entrepreneur, professor, and executive director of the Financial Times Knowledge Dialogue

Crucial Conversations is the most useful self-help book I have ever read. Im awed by how insightful, readable, well organized, and focused it is. I keep thinking: If only I had been exposed to these dialogue skills 30 years ago...

John Hatch, founder, FINCA International

One of the greatest tragedies is seeing someone with incredible talent get derailed because he or she lacks some basic skills. Crucial Conversations addresses the number one reason executives derail, and it provides extremely helpful tools to operate in a fast-paced, results-oriented environment.

Karie A. Willyerd, chief talent officer, Solectron

The book prescribes, with structure and wit, a way to improve on the most fundamental element of organizational learning and growthhonest, unencumbered dialogue between individuals. There are one or two of the many leadership/management thought books on my shelf that are frayed and dog-eared from use. Crucial Conversations will no doubt end up in the same condition.

John Gill, VP of Human Resources, Rolls Royce USA

Crucial
Conversations

Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High

by
Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny,
Ron McMillan, and Al Switzler

Copyright 2002 by Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, Ron McMillan, and Al Switzler. All rights reserved. Except as permitted under the United States Copyright Act of 1976, no part of this publication may be reproduced or distributed in any form or by any means, or stored in a database or retrieval system, without the prior written permission of the publisher.

ISBN: 978-0-07-141583-5

MHID: 0-07-141583-1

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We dedicate this book to
Louise, Celia, Bonnie, and Linda
whose support is abundant,
whose love is nourishing,
and whose patience is just shy of infinite.
And to our children
Christine, Rebecca, Taylor, Scott,
Aislinn, Cara, Seth, Samuel, Hyrum,
Amber, Megan, Chase, Hayley, Bryn,
Amber, Laura, Becca, Rachael, Benjamin,
Meridith, Lindsey, Kelley, Todd
who have been a wonderful source of learning.

CH. 1: Whats a Crucial Conversation?
And Who Cares?

CH. 2: Mastering Crucial Conversations
The Power of Dialogue

CH. 3: Start with Heart
How to Stay Focused on What You Really Want

CH. 4: Learn to Look
How to Notice When Safety Is at Risk

CH. 5: Make It Safe
How to Make It Safe to Talk about Almost Anything

CH. 6: Master My Stories
How to Stay in Dialogue When Youre Angry, Scared, or Hurt

CH. 7: STATE My Path
How to Speak Persuasively, Not Abrasively

CH. 8: Explore Others Paths
How to Listen When Others Blow Up or Clam Up

CH. 9: Move to Action
How to Turn Crucial Conversations into Action and Results

CH. 10: Putting It All Together
Tools for Preparing and Learning