Miller Joanne - Good and angry: exchanging frustration for character-- in you and your kids

1. How Did We Get into This Mess Anyway?
Avoiding the Boxing Ring

2. I Hate to Get Angry!
The Positive Side of Anger

3. They Dont Do What I Say
Instruction: Giving the Gift of Responsibility

4. They Keep Doing the Wrong Thing
Correction: Giving the Gift of Wisdom

5. They Wont Accept No for an Answer
Accepting Limits: Giving the Gift of Contentment

6. They Always Grumble and Complain
Attitude: Giving the Gift of Perspective

7. Theyre So Annoying
Restraint: Giving the Gift of Self-Control

8. They Lie
Honesty: Giving the Gift of Integrity

9. Im Still Angry
Forgiveness: Living the Gift of Peace

Hello,

Im Scott Turansky. My wife, Carrie, and I have five children: Josh, Melissa, Ben, Elizabeth, and Megan. We have certainly influenced our children over the years, but they have taught us a lot as well. God has used our kids to help us grow and to reveal weaknesses in us that need attention. Weve learned things like how much patience we have or dont have and better ways to handle conflict. Just the other day, I was helping our daughter Megan with math. She wasnt catching the idea, and I was getting frustrated. She gently said, Dad, youre getting loud. She was right. I took a deep breath and tried again with a more gentle voice. Family life has taught me humility in more ways than I want to admit, but I wouldnt trade it for anything. I love my wife and my children, and we are all in this together, learning to be the people God wants us to be.

Hi,

Im Joanne Miller, and my husband is Ed. We have two sons, Dave and Tim, who are full of energy, thoughtfulness, and fun. Our family enjoys working and playing together as we homeschool and serve in our church. I am also a pediatric nurse. My love for children and desire to see families relate together successfully goes back as far as I can remember.

The Millers and Turanskys have been friends and partners in ministry since our children were very young. Scott, Carrie, Ed, and I have enjoyed watching our kids grow up together. One day, my son Dave was talking to Scotts son Josh about the parenting seminars that we teach. Josh teasingly said, You know, Dave, youre not the only one that learns from your mistakes. Hundreds of other families learn from your mistakes. Life is funny sometimes. We are grateful for the opportunities God has given us to serve him.

Mans anger does not bring about
the righteous life that God desires.

J AMES 1:20

Dear Scott and Joanne,

I swore I would never become a yeller, but I did. I was shocked with myself. I heard other parents yell at their kids and just couldnt believe they could do that. But when it was my turn, I never gave it a second thought. My daughter is extremely strong-willed, and I always thought Id have a good little girl. She threw me for a loop and I wasnt prepared. I just didnt know what to do. Any hint of whining, arguing, bickering, or just plain defiance would send me into one of my tirades. I knew I was just letting off steam and that I was damaging my relationship with her, but I didnt know what else to do, and I was so upset I didnt even care.

Now that my daughter is seven and my son is five, Ive finally figured out that yelling isnt the answer. When my daughter yells at her brother, it sounds just like me. I cringe when I hear it. Because of your materials and the Lords help, Im making some significant changes, and I cant believe the difference. Im learning some new ways of relating to my children and strategies for helping them to be more godly. Most importantly, Im seeing how Gods power is so practical in family life and that I, as a mom, can lead my children to follow the Lord.