Richardson - The art of extreme self-care: 12 practical and inspiring ways to love yourself more

Are you in need of
Extreme Self-Care?

As you read through the following statements, note the ones that ring true.

• I carry a lot of resentment, feeling angry with others who dont meet my needs.
• I expect people to read my mind and know what I want or need.
• I often feel like Im living my life for everyone else.
• I have many one-sided relationships where people take more than they give.
• Sex feels like one more task on an already long to-do list.
• I break too many promises to myself.
• I have trouble getting others to share in the workload at home.
• I give to others because it makes me feel needed, important, or worthy.
• Its rare for me to relax or to enjoy things that are fun.
• Id love to discover something I feel passionate about.
• I cant remember the last time I had a good nights sleep.
• When Im overwhelmed, tired, or stressed, I rarely think to ask for help.
• I secretly long to be acknowledged for all the helpful things I do.
• People who act entitled make me cringe; Im never like that.
• I sometimes feel foolish about the ways in which Ive put the needs of others before my own.
• Im concerned about a health issue and keep putting off doing something about it.
• I hate disappointing people.

If five or more statements rang true for you, life as youve known it is about to change!

Also by Cheryl Richardson

Books

Take Time for Your Life: A Personal Coachs Seven-Step Program for Creating the Life You Want

Life Makeovers:52 Practical and Inspiring Ways to Improve Your Life One Week at a Time

Stand Up for Your Life:Develop the Courage, Confidence, and Character to Fulfill Your Greatest Potential

Unmistakable Touch of Grace:How to Recognize and Respond to the Spiritual Signposts in Your Life

Turning Inward:A Private Journal of Self-Reflection*

You Can Create an Exceptional Life (with Louise Hay)*

Waking Up in Winter: In Search of What Really Matters at Midlife

Audio Programs

Finding Your Passion (4-CD program)*

Tuning In: Listening to the Voice of Your Soul (CD)*

Experience the Power of Grace (6-CD program)*

Card Decks

Grace Cards (a 50-card deck)*

Self-Care Cards (a 52-card deck)*

My Daily Affirmation Cards (a 50-card deck)*

*Available from Hay House

Please visit:

Hay House USA: www.hayhouse.com
Hay House Australia: www.hayhouse.com.au
Hay House UK: www.hayhouse.co.uk
Hay House India: www.hayhouse.co.in

Copyright 2009, 2019 by Cheryl Richardson

Published in the United States by: Hay House, Inc.: www.hayhouse.com Published in Australia by: Hay House Australia Pty. Ltd.: www.hayhouse.com.au Published in the United Kingdom by: Hay House UK, Ltd.: www.hayhouse.co.uk Published in India by: Hay House Publishers India: www.hayhouse.co.in

Cover design: Julie Davison Interior design: Nick C. Welch

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced by any mechanical, photographic, or electronic process, or in the form of a phonographic recording; nor may it be stored in a retrieval system, transmitted, or otherwise be copied for public or private useother than for fair use as brief quotations embodied in articles and reviewswithout prior written permission of the publisher.

The author of this book does not dispense medical advice or prescribe the use of any technique as a form of treatment for physical, emotional, or medical problems without the advice of a physician, either directly or indirectly. The intent of the author is only to offer information of a general nature to help you in your quest for emotional, physical, and spiritual well-being. In the event you use any of the information in this book for yourself, the author and the publisher assume no responsibility for your actions.

The author gratefully acknowledges Thomas Leonard, founder of Coach University and www.coachville.com, and one of the earliest formulators of the concept of Extreme Self-Care.

Library of Congress Control Number for Original Edition: 2006940287

Tradepaper ISBN: 978-1-4019-5248-8

e-book ISBN: 978-1-4019-2482-9

To Michael, my one and only love...

Dear Reader,

Life is pretty stressful, and its easy to feel overwhelmed and stuck. Weve all been there. I certainly have. And coaching changed everything.

My training as a professional coach started with the expectation that I focus on my own self-care first. I learned to say no gracefully (and firmly); I became comfortable with disappointing others (you cant avoid it); I worked hard to cultivate and protect my sensitivity (the key to a rich and meaningful life); and I finally made my health a top priority not only in my head but in my daily calendar, too.

I repeatedly practiced the action steps Ive outlined in this book, and once I had a good foundation underfoot, I started helping others do the same. And Ive been doing so for over 20 years.

Since this book was first published 10 years ago, Ive received e-mails from readers who have radically changed the way they live their lives as a result of doing the work outlined in this program. Thousands of people have learned to weather the guilt feelings that occur when they start to make their needs more of a priority. Theyve ended relationships that were harmful to their integrity and self-esteem. Theyve created soul-nourishing homes and offices that support their productivity and health. And theyve learned the value of asking for and receiving help so they no longer carry the weight of lifes responsibilities on their own.

There are telltale signs that you need a self-care upgrade. Are you continuously breaking promises to yourself once youve planned ways to care for your emotional, physical, and spiritual health? Do you live in a chronic state of resentment because you do so much for others that you dont have time to do the things you want to do? Are your relationships centered more on what you have to offer than on a mutual give and take? And have you ever fantasized about buying a one-way ticket to anywhere but where you are?

Well, life as you know it is about to change.

This book contains the practical skills you need to make your self-care a top priority. It provides a step-by-step process for developing the kind of healthy habits that will dramatically improve the quality of your life. This journey is designed to help you live life on your terms, rather than on past conditioning, tribal rules, or the societal pressures that most of us have been trained to follow.

This new version of The Art of Extreme Self-Care offers you two important additions. The first is an updated resource section at the end of each chapter to ensure you have access to the websites, books, podcasts, etc., that will inspire you and give you additional information to help you stay on track.

The second addition is detailed information about how to create and run a successful support group so you can work through this program with others. Over the years, thousands of readers have joined together to help one another make positive life changes. Working with a group makes the process fun, and it also gives you much-needed courage when its time to take bold steps to support your self-care. Most of all, forming a successful group will help you to build intimate, long-lasting, healthy relationshipsthe greatest blessing of all