Emily Doskow - Nolos Essential Guide to Divorce

By Attorney Emily Doskow

By Attorney Emily Doskow

To my father, Charles Doskow, whom I admire more than I usually manage to express, and whose faith in me and pride in my work have meant so much to me.

No one deserves more gratitude than my editor, Mary Randolph, whose collaborative spirit and unparalleled skill steadied me throughout the writing process and improved everything about this book immeasurably.

For the second edition, I'm enormously grateful to Marshal Willick for answering questions, reviewing the new Chapter 12, and generally sharing his great expertise on the topic of military divorce. Many thanks, too, to Dr. Joan B. Kelly, who generously allowed the inclusion of her wonderfully useful material on custody schedules.

Again, many thanks to Alayna Schroeder and Terry McGinley for their careful assistance with research, and to all of my colleagues in the editorial department at Nolo for their encouragement and support. The production department once again made the book look wonderful-thanks to Terri Hearsh.

I am obliged to other Nolo authors for producing terrific books that cover thoroughly some of the topics I had room only to touch on: Violet Woodhouse, Mimi Lyster, Katherine Stoner, Twila Slesnick, and Paul Mandelstein all contributed to making this book useful and resource rich.

I am indebted to all of the divorced folks who so graciously allowed me to pry into their personal lives in the course of my research.

Huge appreciation to Andrea Palash for answering questions, reviewing drafts, and being perpetually supportive. And many thanks to family and a multitude of friends (special mention to Mady Shumofsky, Pamela Brown, Linda Gebroe, and Susanne Cohen and Jim Gaines) for their support.

Finally, I'm eternally grateful to and for my beloved partner, Luan Stauss, for her patience, practical help, encouragement, and inspiration.

Introduction: Your Divorce Companion

Getting Oriented

............................................................................................................. 5

...................................................................................... 22

First Steps After You Decide to Divorce

................................................................................................................... 26

................................................................................................. 28

.................................................. 50

......................................................................................................... 50

When You Can Agree: Uncontested Divorce

.................................................................................................. 77

............................................................................ 78

Working It Out: Divorce Mediation

............................................................................................... 88

.............................................................................................................. 92

When You Can't Agree: Contested Divorce and Trial

Custody Decisions and Parenting

Custody Disputes

Child Support

Yours, Mine, and Ours: Basics of Marital Property

Yours, Mine, and Uncle Sam's: Dividing Property

.................................................................................................................... 241

.............................................................................................................. 274

Spousal Support and Health Insurance

Military Divorce: Special Issues

.................................................................................................................................... 333

Getting It in Writing: Preparing Your Marital Settlement Agreement

..................................................................................................... 337

Critical Care: When Things Really Go Wrong

After the Divorce

Getting Help, Finding Information, and Looking Stuff Up

.............................................................................................................................. 428

Appendix

..................................................................................................................... 441