Leonie Huie - The First Year Is Survival: The essential guide for parenting twins & multiples

Published in Great Britain by Hashtag Press 2020

Text Leonie Huie 2020

Cover Design Helen Braid 2020

The moral right of the author has been asserted

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means without the prior written permission of the publisher, nor be otherwise circulated in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser.

A CIP catalogue for this book is available from the British Library.

ISBN 978-1-9138350-6-4

Typeset in Garamond Classic 11.25/14 by Blaze Typesetting

Printed in Great Britain by Clays Ltd, St Ives plc

HASHTAG PRESS BOOKS

Hashtag Press Ltd

Kent, England, United Kingdom

Email:

Website: www.hashtagpress.co.uk

Twitter: @hashtag_press

I dedicate this book to my mother, June Martin.
Words cannot describe how much I appreciate her, especially through such a challenging pregnancy and overwhelming first year as a mother of twins. I dont know what I would have done without this amazing human being.
I love you Mum.
Dont ever change.

This book was written to help support mothers, fathers, carers and family members who have a part in raising multiples. I would like to include a special thanks to all the amazing parents who provided me with their real-life insights into being a parent of twins, triplets or quadruplets. Speaking with you and hearing your experiences made me realise I was not alone with my feelings of anxiousness, tiredness and moments of loneliness during the first year as a mother of twins. Your contributions, advice and tips will help so many other parents about to embark on a journey of multiples and survive the first year.

A sincere thank you to my husband, Josh, for being such a wonderful dad to our twins, who worship him dearly, true Daddys girls. Thank you for giving me the time to complete this book by keeping our twins occupied and for the contributions you have made to this book, which Im sure will benefit many new fathers of multiples.

I would like to thank my publishers, Hashtag Press, for making my idea into a reality. Their guidance and support made a challenging journey much easier.

I feel endless gratitude for my mother who raised three daughters on her own - she is a true superwoman. She has taught me how to be fearless, hardworking and resourceful. She is a mum who has made endless sacrifices in her life to raise me and my sisters and always put us first no matter what. An amazing grandmother to her three grandchildren. Thank you for everything mum from the bottom of my heart.

Julia and Monique, my beautiful two sisters. I sincerely thank you both for everything, always there for me, you both know how full on life has been for me with your nieces but there to offer me a helping hand.

To my dad, thank you for just listening at the other end of the phone whenever I needed to speak to you, moments Ill cherish and never forget. Amazing grandparents, my in-laws, always ready to offer a helping hand with the twins whenever needed, the appreciation is endless.

My four-year-old niece Lotus (my little chicken I call her) born at 27 weeks, a survivor, fighter, miracle baby. You have taught me the true meaning of courage, determination and appreciation of the smaller things in life.

The appreciation and love I have for Aunty Emma who helped raise my twins, looked after them whilst my husband and I worked. Taught them how to count, their ABCs and table manners. I am truly grateful for all you have done. And my wonderful cousin Ray-J for being there who the twins love dearly.

Im a true believer in the saying An angel has been sent from above. My friend Cassandra is that angel. I cannot thank her enough for her love, care and support she has shown me and my twins. Also, always there whenever I need her.

I am forever grateful to my best friends Jazzy and Ayo for their support during my pregnancy and beyond. Having people like these two around you, who you can rely on, talk to at any time and who help you whenever you need them; I am blessed to have such amazing beings in my life who make it so easy not to be afraid to ask for help as a new parent of multiples.

Lastly, I want to thank my twin daughters La Belle and Lourdes who inspired me to write this book to help other parents of multiples survive that all important first year. You are both my heart and soul, and my life has even more purpose now you are both in it. I love you both more than life itself and cant wait for the endless adventures well have together as you grow.

Where there is a woman, there is magic.

-Ntozake Shange

Hi, my name is Leonie. Firstly, I want to thank you for reading The First Year is Survival. Whether you are a parent of one child, twins or multiples, I hope you find this book useful. I just want to be clear before you read further; I have based this book on my own experiences as a mother of twins with a little input from my husband from a fathers perspective. I have also interviewed mums and dads from around the world to get their views on being parents of multiples and the struggles they have faced. Ive included survival tips at the end of each chapter; they come from wonderful parents from around the globe sharing their wisdom and knowledge, which they used to survive the first year of parenthood.

The reason I decided to structure my book like this is because its not just about what my husband and I went through in the first year of being a parent of twins, or how we survived, its about what weve all experienced as mothers and fathers raising multiples. We have so much in common but at times it can feel like those early days of parenting are so lonely and isolating. It can feel, when youre in the midst of a sleepless night, that youre the only person awake rocking your baby back to sleep at 3am. And for those parents who have one child at a time, parents planning for a baby or currently expecting, Im sure youll be able to read this book and relate to many parts of it.

This self-help guide can be used as an informative tool to help prepare you for the first year of parenting. It is not intended to scare you, or make you worry, but to provide you with some insightful information, increasing your awareness of things that might happen and how best to deal with situations as they arise. As we know, all children are different, and all families are different, but I hope in this book there will be a lot of useful advice to make parenting in your first year that little bit easier.

To give you some more information about me, Im a mum of fraternal twin girls who I call my twin heartbeats. Im 39, married to Josh (who Ill talk about in this book), a teacher, entrepreneur, empowerment coach and public speaker. I live in the wonderful, vibrant city of London and havent slept properly since being five months pregnant! I come from a large family with plenty of twins going back generations. My grandmother, born and raised in Dominica, was one of 14 children and a twin; she had five children including twin boys (my uncles). One of my uncles then had twin boys and I had twin girls. I also have a lot of twin cousins, so twinning is most definitely a thing in my family.