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Emily Ehrenstein - The Everything Wedding Etiquette Book: Insights and Advice On Handling Even the Stickiest Wedding Issues

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Emily Ehrenstein The Everything Wedding Etiquette Book: Insights and Advice On Handling Even the Stickiest Wedding Issues
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The Everything Wedding Etiquette Book: Insights and Advice On Handling Even the Stickiest Wedding Issues: summary, description and annotation

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Looking for up-to-date advice on todays complicated wedding issues? Let The Everything Wedding Etiquette Book be your guide! This practical book offers all the answers to your most commonly asked etiquette questions, including:

  • Can I asked my future in-laws to help pay for the reception?
    • How can I include stepparents in the wedding?
    • Do I have to invite dates for single guests?
    • ...And many more! Youll also learn the correct way to word wedding invitations for all types of family situations, how to let people know youre keeping your maiden name, and how to whittle down your guest list. Filled with insight and contemporary advice for your tricky wedding dilemmas, The Everything Wedding Etiquette Book will help you have a fun-and stress-free-wedding!
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    THE

    EVERYTHING WEDDING ETIQUETTE BOOK Insights and advice on handling even the - photo 3

    EVERYTHING
    WEDDING
    ETIQUETTE
    BOOK

    Insights and advice
    on handling even
    the stickiest
    wedding issues

    Emily Ehrenstein and Laura Morin
    with Leah Furman and Elina Furman

    Acknowledgments Wed like to express our deepest gratitude to Janet Anastasio - photo 4

    Acknowledgments

    Wed like to express our deepest gratitude to Janet Anastasio and Michelle Bevilacqua, whose work was the inspiration for this book. Best wishes and thanks to Nancy True and Tami Monahan Forman, who were always there to share their real-life experiences, and to Susan Beale for her topnotch design and production work. Thanks also to the Association of Bridal Consultants, Hazel Bowman of Celebrations by Bowman, and Diane Green of Distinctive Weddings for their expert advice.

    Copyright 2000, F+W Publications, Inc. All rights reserved. This book, or parts thereof, may not be reproduced in any form without permission from the publisher; exceptions are made for brief excerpts used in published reviews.

    An Everything Series Book.
    Everything and everything.com are registered trademarks
    of F+W Publications, Inc.

    Published by Adams Media, an F+W Publications Company
    57 Littleifield Street, Avon, MA 02322. U.S.A.
    www.adamsmedia.com

    ISBN 10: 1-58062-454-5
    ISBN 13: 978-1-58062-454-1
    Printed in Canada.

    J I H G F E D C B A

    Many of the designations used by manufactures and sellers to distinguish their products are claimed as trademarks. Where those designations have appeared in this book and Adams Media was aware of a trademark claim, the designations have been printed in initial capital letters.

    Illustrations by Barry Littmann and Kathie Kelleher.

    This book is available at quantity discounts for bulk purchases.
    For information, call 1-800-289-0963.

    Contents

    1. Pop Goes the Question: Sharing the News
    of Your Engagement

    7. By Invitation Only: Wedding Invitations
    and Announcements

    8. Getting to I Do: Ceremony Rules
    and Rituals

    9. Behind the Scenes:
    Planning Your Ceremony

    11. Were Having a Party:
    Planning Your Reception

    13. Better Keep Em Happy:
    The Seating Dilemma

    14. Right in Tune:
    Reception Music and Dancing

    15. Heres to You: Wedding Toasts and
    Other Traditions

    16. Panic, Schmanic: What to Do When
    All Does Not Go as Planned

    18. Thank-You Notes:
    When to Send, What to Say

    20. To Hyphenate or Not to Hyphenate:
    Choosing Your Name

    Introduction

    Are you on the verge of eloping? Do you feel as if youll scream if one more person tries to give you advice? This is not exactly the way you pictured your blissfully-engaged self. You can still remember the day you said yes. Oh, the fun you thought youd have. Planning the wedding, choosing a gown, breaking open the Dom Perignontalk about the time of your life! Yes, that was a great day, a day when you learned that your dream of being a blushing bride would soon come true. Well, at this point youre probably coming to terms with some of lifes harsher realities, and realizing exactly why its the bride who traditionally does all the blushing. By now, youve probably realized that putting a wedding together can be, well, overwhelming. Not only do you have a hundred different things to worry about, but your mother, future mother-in-law, and just about everyone you know is probably trying to tell you the right and wrong way of doing things. Everyone, it seems, is an expert on wedding etiquette. With so many differing points of view, whats a well-meaning bride to do? Believe it or not, two round-trip tickets to Vegas are not the answer. By following the rules of etiquette, youll not spend your day in the sun feeling as if youre in the doghouse.

    Thats where The Everything Wedding Etiquette Book comes in. This book wont tell you where to place the dessert fork, but it will tell you how to solve more contemporary etiquette dilemmas, like how to seat divorced parents at the reception and whether or not your sister can host a wedding shower. It will also tell you how to word wedding invitations, whether or not a cash bar is appropriate, and what to do if a wedding gift arrives damaged.

    This book also recognizes that there are no hard and fast rules of etiquette - photo 5

    This book also recognizes that there are no hard and fast rules of etiquette anymorewhats right for one bride may not be right for another. Many questions, especially those dealing with divorced families, have no single correct answer; solutions to these types of dilemmas depend upon the dynamics within your particular family. You should also remember that many questions of etiquette are simply a matter of common sense; others can be avoided altogether through flexibility and communication.

    The Everything Wedding Etiquette Book is designed to relieve some of the stress associated with wedding planning. Within these pages you will find the answers to any type of etiquette dilemma you and your fianc may face. It will also give you advice and insights on how to plan a fabulous wedding. Keep this book handy, and youll be prepared for any snags and glitches that may come your way.

    Good luck!

    C HAPTER O NE
    Pop Goes
    the Question:
    Sharing the News
    of Your Engagement

    A s soon as youre engaged, the first thing you want to do is tell everyone you see. Dont. If

    you ever want your mother to speak to you again, resist the temptation. Your families, not Sam the butcher, should be the first to know. And Mom and Dad should be told in person if at all possible. If not, telling them over the phone is OK, but then try to arrange a visit for you and your fianc as soon as possible. Although getting engaged may very well go down as one of the happiest moments in your life, try to remember that people close to you might respond with a mixed bag of emotions. Your parents can either be thrilled to bits, perturbed by the prospect of losing their daughter, or a combination of the two. The same goes for your best friends and siblings. The way in which you break the happy news can make a great deal of difference in how accepting your intimate relations are of you, your fianc, and your decision to tie the knot.

    Can we announce our engagement if I dont have a ring or we dont have an exact date?

    In a word, yes. As soon as he asks you to marry him and you say yes, its official. Or, as soon as you ask him and he says yes, its official.

    My fianc and I agreed to get married before talking it over with my parents. Will they be upset that he didnt consult them before proposing?

    While you know your parents better than anyone, in this day and age it is highly unusual for parents to frown at a suitors failure to ask them for their daughters hand in marriage. In days of yore, the fathers permission had to be obtained before an engagement could be struck, but this custom is no longer applicable, as nowadays the decision is clearly up to the bride-to-be (or not-to-be, as the case may be). If your parents are informed of the engagement promptly after the proposal, there should be no hard feelings whatsoever.

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