Peter Spevak - Empowering Underachievers: New Strategies to Guide Kids (8-18) to Personal Excellence

Copyright 2006 by Peter A. Spevak and Maryann Karinch

All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form whatsoever, including electronic, mechanical, or any information storage or retrieval system, except as may be expressly permitted in the 1976 Copyright Act or in writing from the publisher.

Requests for permission should be addressed to:

New Horizon Press

P.O. Box 669

Far Hills, NJ 07931

Spevak, Peter A. and Karinch, Maryann

Empowering Underachievers: New Strategies to Guide Kids (8-18) to Personal Excellence (Revised and Expanded)

Cover Design: Robert Aulicino

Interior Design: Eileen Turano

Library of Congress Control Number: 2005937783

ISBN-13 (eBook): 978-0-88282-358-4

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To Trish

TABLE OF CONTENTS

This book is based on both first-person research and extensive interviews with clients of the Center for Applied Motivation and their parents. In order to protect privacy, fictitious names and identities have been given to all individuals in this book and otherwise identifying characteristics have been altered. For the purposes of simplifying usage, the pronouns his and her are often used interchangeably.

The information contained herein is not meant to be a substitute for professional evaluation and therapy.

As a teenager, Peter was a defiant underachiever. Even though he qualified for advanced math, he remained in the lower two-thirds of his high school class. Primarily, he took vocational-technical classes and learned to weld, repair cars and do woodworking. As a student, he frustrated his teachers and parents. He thought high school was an irrelevancy imposed upon him. Even though he read avidly, He just wouldnt read what he was supposed to when he was supposed to. No one could tell him what to do. He was confused and headed nowhere fast.

After high school, he slipped into Purdue University on high SAT scores. He thought college would help him avoid having to work a blue-collar job (in factories and mills) like many of his relatives. At Purdue, he excelledsocially. Academically, he failed miserably. He arrived at Purdue in 1965 and left in 1966 during the Vietnam War.

Rather than be drafted, he enlisted in the Marine Corps. It was during his early days in the service that he had his Aha! experience, the moment when life hit him hard and he thought, Aha! Thats what everyones been trying to tell me! He gained insights and made attitude shifts that turned his life around.

After four years in the Marines, he went back to school, to Indiana University in Bloomington, and excelledacademically, this time. Then he tackled graduate school at the University of Missouri in Columbia on a fellowship. He even earned a masters degree and a Ph.D. in clinical psychology.

The underachieving kid was me. The man who discovered how to strive for personal excellence is me. I finally learned to take charge, which shaped my philosophy that life is what you make it.

When I realized what it took to propel myself forward, an intense interest in helping other underachievers took hold. I wanted to reach them at an early age so they could effectively meet the challenges of high school, college, career and relationshipsand enjoy these things much more. I wanted to help others experience the joy of fulfillment that comes with hard work. My research and the whole focus of my professional life have resulted from that intense interest. While still wandering the halls of the Indiana University Medical Center where I served as an assistant professor, I studied why people change and why people remain unchanged after theyve gone through therapy. Even more importantly, I focused on the factors that would make the therapy stick.

Eventually, my philosophies on motivation and achievement crystallized, and I started putting them to work for students who were having struggles very much like my own. Fortunately, one of the results of more than two decades of work has been the transformation of many young peoplestudents who broke through emotional walls to achieve at, or close to, their full potentialsat the Center for Applied Motivation, which I founded.

Adults have also directly benefited in some cases. Ive seen parents take their new knowledge about motivation into many areas of their lives including the workplace to help the adult underachievers they manage. Also, individual adults plagued by underachievement have changed dramatically through their studies at the Center for Applied Motivation.

Parents, teachers, executives and others who care about changing those whose lives they impact so that they can reach personal excellence, we are on the same team! This book will help you gain perspectives on motivation, prevent future problems and increase your effectiveness in moving others and yourself toward self-motivation and achievement. In these pages, Ill tell you what can help you make a difference forand withyour underachiever. I will help you guide your child toward greater personal responsibility and personal excellence.

In this second edition, I want to express my appreciation to the growing number of parents, educators and students who are reaching out for more information about a philosophy against the scourge of underachievement. Our experience continues to enable us to refine our methods and supplement them with new insights to aid you.

Peter A. Spevak, Ph.D.

First of all, we jointly thank our loving and supportive partners.

Peter: I recognize and thank Patricia Spevak, friend, wife and ongoing inspiration, for her support, love, sense of humor, insights, criticisms and suggestions. Her efforts have been primary in developing, applying and evolving the Center for Applied Motivation and its philosophy.

Maryann: Thank you to Jim McCormick, whose caring and intelligence bring so much to my life and my work. I also want to thank Patricia, who was our creative partner throughout the development of this book.

We both want to thank other members of our immediate families: Michael and Mary Spevak and Karl (who lives on in my heart) and Ann Karinch, whose solid basic values helped us form as individuals. Brother Karl also has been a great teacher of values and priorities.

Thanks also to Patrick Avon, founder of the Sergeants Program, which was once headquartered near the Center. He brought us together.

For his graphic talents and skills, we thank Michael Gravino. We also appreciate Laura Belt of Adler and Robin Books, who brought our ideas to the attention of New Horizon Press. And thank you to our editor, Joan Dunphy, whose insight and experience added to the final product. Thank you also to JoAnne Thomas, Christina Mucciolo and Chris Nielsen at New Horizon for helping us succeed in this effort.