Karen McKibbin - Life on the Autism Spectrum--A Guide for Girls and Women

McKibbins solid research and clinical experiences work together in this book to give voice and support to countless autistic and Aspie females who have been misdiagnosed, misunderstood, or simply missed altogether. Thank you, Dr. McKibbin!

Liane Holliday Willey, EdD, author of Pretending to be Normal and Safety Skills for Asperger Women

Life on the Autism Spectrum: A Guide for Girls and Women is a natural and welcome progression in the growing catalog of literature aimed at understanding the complexities of females with Aspergers.

Rudy Simone, author of Aspergirls and Aunt Aspies Weapon of Mass Instruction

Karen has contributed a valuable addition to the growing wealth of knowledge about the female autistic profile. With real-life examples and tips for living well, this book will support autistic women to gain the real sense of our own identity that we all need.

Sarah Hendrickx, Autistic Adult and Autism Specialist, author of Women and Girls with ASD: Understanding Life Experiences from Early Childhood to Old Age

This book provides a refreshing and empowering look at the female experience of autism spectrum disorders throughout the life span. Dr. McKibbins compassionate insights on the challenges and gifts unique to girls and women on the spectrum will leave readers inspired. This is a refreshing opportunity for readers to shift their focus from how autism sets individuals apart to truly appreciating the common threads that bind us together. Truly, a must read.

Erin Moran, Psy.D., Clinical Psychologist

of related interest

Aspergirls

Empowering Females with Asperger Syndrome

Rudy Simone

ISBN 978 1 84905 826 1

eISBN 978 0 85700 289 1

Girls Growing Up on the Autism Spectrum

What Parents and Professionals Should Know About the Pre-Teen and Teenage Years

Shana Nichols with Ginamarie Moravcik and Samara Pulver-Tetenbaum

Foreword by Liane Holliday Willey

ISBN 978 1 84310 855 9

eISBN 978 1 84642 885 2

Pretending to be Normal

Living with Aspergers Syndrome (Autism Spectrum Disorder)

2nd Edition

Liane Holliday Willey

Foreword by Tony Attwood

ISBN 978 1 84905 755 4

eISBN 978 0 85700 987 6

Parenting Girls on the Autism Spectrum

Overcoming the Challenges and Celebrating the Gifts

Eileen Riley-Hall

ISBN 978 1 84905 893 3

eISBN 978 0 85700 612 7

I am an Aspie Girl

A book for young girls with autism spectrum conditions

Danuta Bulhak-Paterson

Illustrated by Teresa Ferguson

Foreword by Tony Attwood

ISBN 978 1 84905 634 2

eISBN 978 1 78450 110 5

From Here to Maternity

Pregnancy and Motherhood on the Autism Spectrum

Lana Grant

ISBN 978 1 84905 580 2

eISBN 978 1 78450 025 2

LIFE ON THE

AUTISM

SPECTRUM

A Guide for Girls and Women

Karen McKibbin Foreword by Tony Attwood

Jessica Kingsley Publishers
London and Philadelphia

Quotes on p. 5 are reproduced from Collins 2004 with kind permission from Tessler Agency.

First published in 2016

by Jessica Kingsley Publishers

73 Collier Street

London N1 9BE, UK

and

400 Market Street, Suite 400

Philadelphia, PA 19106, USA

www.jkp.com

Copyright Karen McKibbin 2016

Foreword copyright Tony Attwood 2016

Front cover image source: Thinkstock. The cover image is for illustrative purposes only, and any person featuring is a model.

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced in any material form (including photocopying or storing it in any medium by electronic means and whether or not transiently or incidentally to some other use of this publication) without the written permission of the copyright owner except in accordance with the provisions of the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 or under the terms of a licence issued by the Copyright Licensing Agency Ltd, Saffron House, 610 Kirby Street, London EC1N 8TS. Applications for the copyright owners written permission to reproduce any part of this publication should be addressed to the publisher.

Warning: The doing of an unauthorised act in relation to a copyright work may result in both a civil claim for damages and criminal prosecution.

Library of Congress Cataloging in Publication Data

McKibbin, Karen.

Life on the autism spectrum : a guide for girls and women / Karen McKibbin ; foreword by Tony Attwood.

pages cm

Includes index.

ISBN 978-1-84905-747-9 (alk. paper)

1. Autistic people--Life skills guides. 2. Girls--Life skills guides. 3. Young women with disabilities--Life skills guides. I. Title.

RC553.A88M392 2016

616.85882--dc23

2015016763

British Library Cataloguing in Publication Data

A CIP catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library

ISBN 978 1 84905 747 9

eISBN 978 1 78450 193 8

This book is dedicated to all the incredible women who contributed to it. It would not have been possible without you.

Thank you to all my friends and family who supported me in making this book possible.

Think of it: a disability is usually defined in terms of what is missing But Autismis as much about what is abundant as what is missing, an over-expression of the very traits that make our species unique.

Autists are the ultimate square pegs, and the problem with pounding a square peg into a round hole is not that the hammering is hard work. Its that youre destroying the peg.

Paul Collins

CONTENTS

FOREWORD

Dr. Tony Attwood

Life on the autism spectrum is not easy for girls and women. Although they may have the same profile of characteristics as males, they often adjust to that profile in a different way, and also have different social and society expectations. Thus, girls and women need their own guide, and Karens book is the authoritative guide.

In comparison to boys, girls and women who have an ASD use more constructive coping and adjustment strategies to effectively camouflage their confusion in social situations. They may achieve superficial social success by imitation, or by avoiding engagement in interpersonal situations by escaping into an alternative world of fantasy or nature.

The young girl with ASD can become an avid observer of other children and intellectually analyse and determine what to do in social situations: learning to copy or imitate other girls, or adopting an alternative persona and acting someone who can succeed in social situations. She becomes a social chameleon. Alternatively, some girls escape into imagination and create an alternative world. They constructively avoid social interactions and play with other children, choosing instead to engage in solitary play, developing artistic and musical abilities, avidly reading fiction or spending time enjoying being with pets and animals.

One of the first signs of ASD in girls can be extremely intense emotions, especially distress, and an inability to be comforted by affection, or calmed by reasoning or distraction. Additional aspects can be sensory sensitivity, especially tactile and auditory sensitivity, resistance to change, and the development of routines and rituals. Language abilities can include problems with the art of conversation and a tendency to be pedantic or mute in social situations. Parents notice that their daughter may not identify with or want to play cooperatively with her female peers. She may consider that the play of other girls is stupid, boring and inexplicable, and prefer to play alone so that she can do things her own way. When she does play with her peers, she may be domineering and authoritarian. Her play interests can also be different to other girls her age. She may prefer non-gender specific toys such as Lego, or playing with toys more often associated with boys, such as construction sets and vehicles.