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Marla Alupoaicei - Your Intercultural Marriage: A Guide to a Healthy, Happy Relationship

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Marla Alupoaicei Your Intercultural Marriage: A Guide to a Healthy, Happy Relationship
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In an increasingly global and connected world, marriages between spouses of different countries and cultures are on the rise. Marla Alupoaicei, herself wed to a Romanian, helps couples sort through such issues as food, finances, family, and such hidden problems as different understandings of what it means to be on time. Marla combines real-life stories with expert perspectives and biblical insight for a helpful guide both for those just starting out on the intercultural adventure and those in the midst of it.
Youll get practical and biblical advice for handling the most common intercultural conflicts, including:

  • Planning your wedding
    • Communication
    • Understanding each others values
    • Different views of time
    • Agreeing on food
    • Managing finances
    • Intimacy
    • Raising children
    • Handling illness and grief
  • Marla Alupoaicei: author's other books


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    Notes

    Chapter 1:Discovering the Joys and Benefits of InterculturalMarriage

    1. Mignon McLaughlin, Wisdom Quotes,
    http://www.wisdomquotes.com/001367.html.
    2. Dugan Romano, Intercultural Marriage: Promises &Pitfalls, 3rd ed. (Boston: Nicholas Brealey Publishing, 2008), 169170.
    3. Ibid., 170.
    4. Kim Baumann, "Kaleidoscopes," in Breaking Convention with Intercultural Romances: Personal Accounts, ed. Dianne Dicks (Freedom, CA: The Crossing Press, 1995), 16.
    5. Oliver Wendell Holmes, The Quotations Page,
    http://www.quotationspage.com/quote/26186.html.

    Chapter 2:Understanding Intercultural Marriage Models and Stages

    1. Dave Meurer, Marriage Missions International, http://www.marriagemissions.com/
    quotes-that-teach-marriage-message-311.
    2. Leo Tolstoy, The Quotations Page,
    http://www.quotationspage.com/quote/35235.html.
    3. Dugan Romano, Intercultural Marriage: Promises &Pitfalls, 3rd ed. (Boston: Nicholas Brealey Publishing, 2008), 8.
    4. Ibid., 24.
    5. "HotelRwanda," The Internet Movie Database,
    http://www.imdb.com/title /tt0395169.
    6. Tamula Drumm, "Mixed Marriages: Why Expats MarryForeigners and Then What Happens," TransitionsAbroad.com,
    http://www.transitionsabroad.com/
    publications/magazine/0107/
    mixed_marriages.shtml.
    7. Romano, 1112.
    8. Ibid., 9.
    9. Ibid., 910.
    10. 13. The four intercultural marriage model diagramsare drawn from Romano, Intercultural Marriage: Promises & Pitfalls, 16265.
    14. David and Vera Mace, as quoted at the Marriage MissionsInternational Web site,
    http://www.marriagemissions.com/
    quotes-that-teach-marriage-message-311 .
    15. Dr. Gary Chapman, The Four Seasons of Marriage (Wheaton,IL: Tyndale House, 2005), xii.
    16. Chapman, 22.
    17. Chapman, 34.
    18. Chapman, 51.
    19. Chapman, 10.
    20. Chapman, 69164.

    Chapter 3:Surviving (and Enjoying) Your Engagement, Wedding, and Honeymoon

    1. Sue Patton Thoele, from Courage to Be a Stepmom,Notable Quotes,
    http://www.notable-quotes.com/
    h/honeymoons_quotes.html.
    2. Dugan Romano, Intercultural Marriage: Promises &Pitfalls, 3rd ed. (Boston: Nicholas Brealey Publishing, 2008), 1921.
    3. "Sobering Advice for Anyone Contemplating aCross-Cultural Marriage,"
    http://www.larabell.org/cross.html .
    4. Ibid.
    5. Rebecca R. Kahlenberg, The I Dos and Donts of Intercultural marriage,
    http://www.interfaithfamily.com/relationships/
    interracial_and_intercultural_relationships/
    The_I_Dos_and_Donts_of_Intercultural_Marriage.shtml?rd=1.

    Chapter 4: BuildingStrong Verbal and Nonverbal Communication Skills

    1. George Bernard Shaw,
    www.workinghumor.com.
    2. Art Lucero, "And Two Shall Become One: Merging Two RacialCultures in Christian Love," in Just Don't Marry One: Interracial Dating, Marriage,and Parenting, ed. George A. Yancey and Sherelyn Whittum Yancey (ValleyForge, PA: Judson Press, 2002), 134.
    3. Federico Fellini, asquoted by Dugan Romano in Intercultural Marriage: Promises & Pitfalls,3rd ed. (Boston: Nicholas Brealey Publishing, 2008), 125.
    4. "Sobering Advice for Anyone Contemplating aCross-Cultural Marriage,"
    http://www.larabell.org/cross.html.
    5. Gary Chapman, The Five Love Languages (Chicago:Northfield Publishing, 1995).
    6. Ernest Hemingway, Wisdom Quotes,
    http://www.wisdomquotes.com/cat_communication.html.
    7. Lisa Kirk, ThinkExist.com, http://en.thinkexist.com
    /quotes/Lisa_Kirk.
    8. Man Keung Ho, as quoted by Dugan Romano in InterculturalMarriage: Promises & Pitfalls, 3rd ed. (Boston: Nicholas BrealeyPublishing, 2008), 126127.
    9. Dorothy Tennov, Love and Limerence: The Experience ofBeing in Love, 2nd ed. (Lanham, MD: Scarborough House, 1999).
    10. Merrita Tumonong, "Intercultural Marriage: Compromise& Commitment,"
    http://www.cccwmich.org/
    CounselorArchive.php?action=expand&ID=19.
    11. Emerson Eggerichs, Cracking the Communication Code (Nashville:Thomas Nelson, 2007), 11.
    12. Emerson Eggerichs, Love and Respect (Nashville:Thomas Nelson, 2004), 210211.

    Chapter 5: Understanding Faith and Value

    1. William Hazlett, as quoted by Dugan Romano in InterculturalMarriage: Promises & Pitfalls, 3rd ed. (Boston: Nicholas BrealeyPublishing, 2008), 33.
    2. Romano, 33.
    3. "Value," YourDictionary.com,
    http://www.yourdictionary.com/value.
    4. G. Shelling and J. Fraser-Smith, In Love But WorldsApart (Bloomington, IN: Authorhouse, 2008), 6061.
    5. Romano, 33.
    6. Ibid.
    7. David C. Pollock and Ruth E. Van Reken, Third CultureKids: The Experience of Growing Up Among Worlds (Boston: Nicholas BrealeyPublishing, 2001), 31.
    8. Ibid., 4041.
    9. Ibid., 41.
    10. Romano, 3536.
    11. Romano, 36.
    12. Marriage Missions, "Intercultural Marriage: Is My Way theRight Way?"
    see http://www.marriagemissions.com/intercultural
    -marriages-assumptionsmy-way-the-right-way.
    13. Poem by Alex Graham James, quoted in Pollock and VanReken, Third Culture Kids, 3738.

    Chapter 6: A Biblical Look at Intercultural Marriage

    1. Harlan Miller, Notable Quotes,
    http://www.notable-quotes.com/m/miller_harlan.html.
    2. "Can you provide insight into biblical teaching on interracial marriages?"
    Bible.org at http://www.bible.org/qa.php?qa_id=491.
    3. "Loving v. Virginia," Microsoft Encarta OnlineEncyclopedia 2008,
    http://encarta.msn.com 19972008 Microsoft Corporation. All Rights Reserved. See
    http://encarta.msn.com/encyclopedia_762504597
    /Loving_v_Virginia.html.
    4. John Piper, A Godward Life: Book Two (New York:Multnomah, 1999).
    5. Woodrow Wyatt, Romantic Lyrics,
    http://www.romantic-lyrics.com/lovequotes12.shtml.

    Chapter 7: Getting a Grip on Time

    1. Joel Crohn, Ph.D., Mixed Matches: How to CreateSuccessful Interracial, Interethnic, and Interfaith Relationships (NewYork: Ballantine Books, 1995), 79.
    2. Ibid., 79.
    3. Chart adapted from Joel Crohn, Ph.D., Mixed Matches,79.
    4. Dugan Romano, Intercultural Marriage: Promises andPitfalls, 2nd ed. (Yarmouth, ME: Intercultural Press, Inc., 2001), 65.
    5. Crohn, 80.
    6. Romano, 65.
    7. Ibid., 66.
    8. Crohn, 80.
    9. Romano, 67.
    10. Ernest Thompson Seton, The Gospel of the Redman, as quoted by Ken Gire in The Reflective Life (Colorado Springs, CO:Chariot Victor Publishing, 1998), 1920.
    11. Edward Hall, The Dance of Life (New York: Anchor Books, 1983), 146, 163, 181.
    12. Dead Poets Society"Final Script," screenplay by Tom Schulman (Studio, 1989),
    http://www.peterweircave.com/dps/script.html.
    13. Romano, 67.

    Chapter 8: Avoiding Food Fights: Coming to Terms withFood and Mealtime Issues

    1. Dugan Romano, Intercultural Marriage: Promises andPitfalls, 2nd ed. (Yarmouth, ME: Intercultural Press, Inc., 2001), 46.
    2. James Beard, The Quotations Page,
    http://www.quotationspage.com/quote/33518.html.
    3. Joel Crohn, Ph.D., Mixed Matches: How to CreateSuccessful Interracial, Interethnic, and Interfaith Relationships (NewYork: Ballantine Books, 1995), 57 62.
    4. George Miller, "Laughter.The Best Medicine,"
    "http://www.csmngt.com/
    food_quotations.htm.
    5. "Good Food Ends with Good Talk," Foodminds Blog,
    http://foodminds.blogspot.com/2005/09
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