Kimberlee Davis - The Fiscal Feminist: A Financial Wake-up Call for Women

PRAISE FOR THE FISCAL FEMINIST

Gaining control over your financial situation is one of the most important things you can do to gain confidence in yourself and your future. Kimberlee unlocks the knowledge and mindset needed to do just this.

AMY JO MARTIN, founder and CEO, Renegade Global, investor, and New York Times bestselling author

What Kimberlee has done with this powerhouse of a book is pack biography, authentic care, and true financial lessons into one highly readable and digestible work. Each page reflects her own story and journey, her care for the message of financial empowerment, and the practical lessons necessary for women of all backgrounds and circumstances to find fiscal responsibility. A must-read!

DAVID L. BAHNSEN, Managing Partner, The Bahnsen Group, and author of Theres No Free Lunch: 250 Economic Truths

A refreshing, timely, and insightful strategic guide to motivate all women to achieve empowerment in their personal finances, money relationships, and career development despite the challenges and demands they experience. It is a call to action for women to embrace self-care and seize control of their financial futures.

COCO BROWN, founder and CEO, Athena Alliance

Copyright 2022 by Kimberlee Davis

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system or transmitted, in any form or by any means, without the prior written consent of the publisher.

Library of Congress Control Number: 2021919412

ISBN 978-1-63756-000-6 (paperback)

ISBN 978-1-63756-001-3 (EPUB)

Editor: Ariel Curry

Cover design and interior design: Morgan Krehbiel

Author photo: Jessica Schramm

Published by Wonderwell in Los Angeles, CA

www.wonderwell.press

Distributed in the US by Publishers Group West and in Canada by Publishers Group Canada

To my three daughtersAllison, Claire, and Merrillwho continually inspire me to be the best version of myself

and

to all women who are ready to join the Fiscal Sisterhood

CONTENTS

INTRODUCTION

E ARLY ONE MORNING in the autumn of 2011, I woke up with the sudden urge to check my email. The universe was warning me that something was up. Much to my chagrin, I saw a message from my divorce lawyer in London. My first reaction was, Why on earth am I receiving an email from hermy divorce was finalized over six months ago? And then I read her note, and my world unexpectedly and mercilessly changed forever.

Six months prior to the email, I was divorced in a court in London, England, from my husband of twenty-three years. We had spent the last thirteen years in England, and he remained living there even though I decided to move back to Southern California during the several years of divorce proceedings. The divorce decree awarded me a settlement, alimony, and child support for my three daughters, two of whom were in high school at the time, and one who had just started at university. I was satisfied with the terms of the divorce decree, and all looked secure for my and my childrens future. My daughters and I got on with trying to get acclimated to our new lives and figuring it all out. My plan was to go back to work and reestablish myself in the United States professionally, which in my midfifties was going to be a challenge, but doable in some way.

I thought it was just going to take time. But I no longer had time, because the email informed me that my ex-husband would not be paying alimony anymore, and he was going to court to revise the divorce decree due to his circumstances. Suddenly, our future looked very bleak indeed.

There I was with no real professional game plan; no job at that point; and children who needed to be housed, educated, and fed. It was a wake-up call, a real bullhorn in my ear. The message I heard was: Get with it, make a plan, and execute the planbecause otherwise you and your family are going to be living a very different life.

For six months, I would get some money from my ex-husband by agreement, but after that Id be on my own. Negotiating this revision of our agreement through the court process took almost three yearsduring which I received no alimony or support whatsoever. And in the end, he won the appeal; alimony and child support were reduced to a negligible sum. Fear and desperation took over. I had to downsize in all ways and severely cut costs in short order. I made finding a job in my wheelhouse my job for the foreseeable future. I sent applications furiously, stressed out beyond belief, unable to sleep. I stayed that way until I got fed up with the fear and decided that I would take every opportunity the universe put in front of me to escape this nightmare of fear and feeling powerless.

Enough with the drama, you might be thinkingthis is supposed to be a book about women and money! Let me wrap up my saga by saying that eventually I did find a job as a financial advisor, and that changed my life. It took a long time for me to build up my resources, pay down debt incurred when the alimony stopped, and build my professional standingbut I did it. You may be on a similar journey, trying to navigate an uncertain world with no safety net. I know what it is like to live paycheck to paycheck, because I used all the money from my settlement for rent, living expenses, and education for my daughters.

During this time of struggle, I had some very dark moments, and my eldest daughter sent me a poem she read in her college English class. I hope its as encouraging to you as it was to me:

Invictus by Willian Ernest Henley

Out of the night that covers me,

Black as the pit from pole to pole,

I thank whatever gods may be

For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance

I have not winced nor cried aloud.

Under the bludgeonings of chance

My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears

Looms but the Horror of the shade,

And yet the menace of the years

Finds and shall find me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,

How charged with punishments the scroll,

I am the master of my fate,

I am the captain of my soul.

The Problem with Women and Money

I have been pondering the relationship between women and their fiscal responsibility to themselves for quite some time because of my own experience navigating financial problems. My story turned out alright, but it could have had a very different endinga sad ending where my future and my childrens futures were negatively impacted and my retirement a nightmare. I would never do anything to purposefully put myself and my children at risk, but it almost happened because I did not have my priorities straight, was not vigilant, didnt take preventive action, and didnt know how to have uncomfortable money conversations. I now realize that the fear and uncertainty I felt in those years could have been avoided, or at the very least minimized. My life was the perfect storm of problems that most women face with money:

We dont have the right training.

Women have unique financial issues and concerns that they must confront over the course of their lives, and that differ from mens. Many of our beliefs about money are formed by our upbringing and the people in our lives. Often, women dont get the benefit of the same money talks and education that their male counterparts receive, and the playing field is still not equal. But with that said, we are not born with preconceived notions about money, and it is within our control to reprogram our mindset and secure our financial futures.