Nia the Light - The Book of Light: Illuminate Your Life with Self-Love

Published in the United Kingdom by:

Hay House UK Ltd, The Sixth Floor, Watson House,
54 Baker Street, London W1U 7BU

Tel: +44 (0)20 3927 7290; Fax: +44 (0)20 3927 7291; www.hayhouse.co.uk

Published in the United States of America by:

Hay House Inc., PO Box 5100, Carlsbad, CA 92018-5100

Tel: (1) 760 431 7695 or (800) 654 5126

Fax: (1) 760 431 6948 or (800) 650 5115; www.hayhouse.com

Published in Australia by:

Hay House Australia Pty. Ltd, 18/36 Ralph St, Alexandria NSW 2015

Tel: (61) 2 9669 4299; Fax: (61) 2 9669 4144; www.hayhouse.com.au

Published in India by:

Hay House Publishers India, Muskaan Complex,
Plot No.3, B-2, Vasant Kunj, New Delhi 110 070

Tel: (91) 11 4176 1620; Fax: (91) 11 4176 1630; www.hayhouse.co.in

Text Nia the Light, 2021

Artwork Fern Thatcher, 2021

The moral rights of the author have been asserted.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced by any mechanical, photographic or electronic process, or in the form of a phonographic recording; nor may it be stored in a retrieval system, transmitted or otherwise be copied for public or private use, other than for fair use as brief quotations embodied in articles and reviews, without prior written permission of the publisher.

The information given in this book should not be treated as a substitute for professional medical advice; always consult a medical practitioner. Any use of information in this book is at the readers discretion and risk. Neither the author nor the publisher can be held responsible for any loss, claim or damage arising out of the use, or misuse, of the suggestions made, the failure to take medical advice or for any material on third-party websites.

A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.

Tradepaper ISBN: 978-1-78817-392-6

E-book ISBN: 978-1-78817-396-4

Audiobook ISBN: 978-1-78817-502-9

This book tells the story of the lessons
Ive learnt on my journey of self-love.

Some you may have learnt,
some you may be learning, and
some youre yet to learn.

I hope you enjoy this book
as I enjoyed creating it.
Its yours to doodle over,
to cry with, to travel with,
and to absorb light with.

love and light,

Before I get to hear your incredible story and learn more about you, I thought Id share parts of my journey that have all aligned so perfectly, inspiring each and every page of this book.

I think its important that I take you back to one of the most significant days of my life. The day I let go.

The room was warm and filled with all the people I love. They sat patiently waiting for me to cut my hair. The sound of the snipping scissors got louder, and everyone held their breath, watching. It was as though the golden locks of hair falling toward the floor were revealing a part of my soul for everyone beside me to see. Cutting that first piece of hair was like removing some kind of pain Id been holding on to all of my life, the second felt like releasing the heartbreak I never quite got over, and the third reminded me that all I am and all I want to be wasnt within my hair. It was within me.

I thought Id prepared myself for this moment, but I really wasnt ready for the true feeling of letting go. I hadnt felt this vulnerable since I fell over in the playground as a small child and bruised my knees. My mother comforted me then, just as she did now. When I turned toward the mirror, everyone waited to see my reaction, waited for me to see myself; this was the moment when I saw Nia. I loved what I saw. I thought that snipping off my hair and letting go of something Id depended on for so long would somehow instantly release pain or hurt. Yet it didnt. In fact it started to unravel different aspects of me that I hadnt met or learnt to love, and I found that self-love is truly a journey and not a destination. The beautiful thing about this journey is that as you read this, youll realize that Im still on it. Im still discovering who I was, who I am, and who I want to be.

I used to devote hours to taking pictures of myself and my big blond curly hair, because for each like I received Id feel an abundance of validation. This grew to become a very toxic relationship, as my perception of my beauty was now in the hands of other people.

The moment of realization occurred toward the middle of 2017. Id embarked on two successful tours around the USA, Europe, and Africa where Id been hosting events for women of color to embrace who they are. On my return home, I came to understand how much of the world Id captured with my phone camera but not experienced. I was no longer living my life for me but for everyone else.

I wore my hair loose in its glorious mane every day, and it slowly became my uniform and my blanket of comfort. When I cut it off and removed my uniform, I lost that source of validation and with it my whole sense of self. To rediscover who I was, I made the big decision to remove from my life everything that I depended on to validate my beauty. And so, on January 21, 2018, I cut off my hairthe hair I thought had given me billboards across the USA, enough money to travel the world, features in magazines, and the ability to live a spontaneous life. I know Ill never forget this fearless moment as it also marked the start of my journey of self-love.

Since that day, Ive been learning to love my real self. The self with stretch marks that symbolize my journey from girl to woman, and my acne that tells me when its time to slow down and nourish my body with healthy food, and the hair that grows no matter how many times I try to remove it with wax.

The idea of this book has been within me for many years. Every evening I write in my journal, discussing my day and talking to my younger self. This has become my therapy. We dont realize how much we grow through each day or how many amazing things we achieve. Were so focused on tomorrow that we forget about today. This is why I love writing, living through my inner child by taking Polaroid pictures and sticking them in my journal, and keeping plane tickets to remember the trips I took. It reminds me of my growth and how amazing life can truly be.

The Book of Light is your very own like button, your internal power-up, and your safe space in which to begin exploring who you are. As you work through this book, I want you to share your true self by documenting your experiences of self-love, living your best flaw-filled life, and knowing that as a woman youre always growing and learning. You should be proud of that.

The beautiful illustrations throughout the book will accompany our journey together. This will be a safe and peaceful space to help us connect with something far deeper than pixels.

The Book of Light will give you inspiration to love who you are.

The Book of Light will remind you to be your friend.

The Book of Light will help you to reflect on your journey of the past and your ambitions for the future.

Queens, are you ready to discover your light?

Im so excited to begin this journey with you. As I share my evolving journey, I want you to share yours, too. Ive put together some of the most significant lessons Ive learnt on my journey of womanhood and, although I still have a lot to learn, Im grateful for the woman I am today. This chapter is all about getting to know you and the wonderful beam of light that you are.