Rebekah Diamond - Parent Like a Pediatrician: All the Facts, None of the Fear

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Table of Contents

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

S o, whens your book coming out?

What started as a sort of inside joke (as I answered an increasing number of questions from new parent friends, and friends of friends, and friends of friends of friends), led to a yearslong process of making Parent Like a Pediatrician a reality. Its surreal. And I simply could not have done any of it without the incredible people who supported me at every step.

Thank you to Stuart Reid for not only being the first to suggest that writing this book was something I should seriously pursue but also for showing me exactly how to make that dream possible. Thank you to Sara Manning Peskin, the inspiring physician mom and author and friend who also edited my attempt at a proposal and helped me find my agents.

To my agents, Justin Brouckaert and Todd Shuster, Im still amazed that you knew my passion for realistic, safe parenting advice could turn into this powerhouse of a book. Thank you for pushing me at every step of the way and allowing me to find this singular voice as a parenting author. Justin, I cant get over just how many back-and-forth edits you patiently went through with my proposal. I will always be grateful for the time you took to help me shape my writing for the better.

Thank you to everyone at Kensington for believing in this book unconditionally and integrally, often more than I believed in it myself. To Denise Silvestro, my phenomenal editor, who helped this first-time author wade through the exciting (and sometimes overwhelming) process of actually writing a book. To Ann Pryor, who has spent so much effort in publicizing this book and is the reason it will reach the audience that needs it.

This book comes from the deepest parts of my being. It stems from my true sense of self, a feeling of worth and love that I maintain through my family and friends. And Im so lucky to be loved and supported by so many. I can only parent like a pediatrician because of the parenting I have myself been fortunate enough to receive. To my parents, who showed me from the very beginning that unconditional love for a child is simply an expectation. To my mom, a badass doctor-mom herself who made raising four children look easy. There has never been a more devoted mother and I continue to use your parenting as a source of inspiration. To my dad, who actively loved and supported his children before society routinely expected this of fathers.

Thank you to each and every member of my large, warm, messy, and wonderful family who continue to support me in all that I do. To my three incredible brothers, who outshine me so spectacularly that I am filled with far more pride than jealousy. To my aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, nieces, nephews. Growing up alongside so many of you is what helped me become the person I am today. Thank you for always being there for me, and for bringing new and wonderful people into our family. To Nana and Poppop, I hope its always been clear how much of who I am has been shaped by you, and how grateful I am. Nana, your legacy shines through the endless accomplishments of the family you created. You were the mother of mothers, our matriarch, and my biggest cheerleader. I miss you every day, and I know you would have loved this book.

To my amazing friends, who continue to inspire and encourage me daily. Hilary Haimes, Katelyn OConnor, Susanna OKulamed school may be over, but youll always be my girls crew. Avital Fischer, my forever work spouse. Katharine Magliocco, I would be lost without you. Thank you for being my number one fan, unpaid brand manager, life coach, and true friend. Emily Rassel, my one-time co-parent and all-time pediatrician-mom idol. Phoebe Danziger, my mind-twin who started me on this writing journey way back when and who continues to inspire and intimidate me in the best of ways.

Thank you to the experts who so graciously shared their brilliance with me and helped me provide evidence-based guidance in this book. Melissa Glassman, Ellie Erickson, Cristina Fernandez, and countless other physician colleagues and role models who showed me how pediatrician parents can speak up and make a difference.

Like so many parents, I wouldnt be able to do anything without the incredible efforts of childcare workers. Priscila, thank you for helping me raise my daughter to be the wonderful person she is. I couldnt have accomplished any of this without knowing that she was loved and safe in your care. Michelle, the original nanny, thank you for giving us our foundation.

I share my own mental and physical health struggles throughout this book so others will feel empowered to get the help they need. Thank you to my own health-care team. To Dr. Katie Pasque, without whom I literally wouldnt be alive, I still look to you as a model for my work both as a physician and also as a supporter of parents. To my own psychiatrist and therapist, thank you for getting me through everything.

And above all, this book is dedicated to the loves of my life. To my husband, thank you for being you. You are the best partner I could ever have hoped for, and a greater father than I ever could have imagined existed. And to my daughter, whom I love more than words can ever express. Everything I do is to make the world a better place for you. You are my light, my joy, my proudest accomplishment. The greatest privilege and pleasure in my life is being your mommy.

EPILOGUE

A Send-Off into Safe and Sane Toddlerhood

C ongratulations! Not just on getting to the end of this book, but on being an amazing parent already. You clearly love your baby and are going to do everything you need to do to create a warm, supportive, nurturing environment. Theres no need to ditch science, but theres also no need to ignore common sense. I hope you feel fully confident that the first year of your little ones life will be filled with maximal joy, safety, and sanity.

Bask in this accomplishment. Did you bask? Great. Now lets take a sneak peek at whats to come: toddlerhood.

Spoiler alerts abound. No need to rush ahead through the mommy blogs; just do your best to stay present in every moment of your babys precious first year. Heres all the fun thats to come in the toddler years. Stick with me and youll be able to tackle it with (relative) ease.

#TimesUp for Time-Out

In an age of snowplow parenting (in which parents attempt to push away all of lifes obstacles from a childs path, to assure success), we are increasingly unwilling to tolerate our children being even in temporary discomfort. Well explore how centuries of research in behavioral psychology and resilience training, combined with a loving, empathic approach, can create a framework for dealing with tantrums, biting, and everyday toddler meltdowns.

Toilet Training

No, quarantine and #workfromhome did not mean we miraculously had the energy and motivation to take advantage of our isolation and follow a strict potty-training regimen. And it turned out just fine.

Milk Money

Just as you put away the last bottles, pump parts, and infant-feeding accessories, your social media feed flashes an ad for toddler formula: Organic, plant-based, non-toxic, expensive, and necessary! Nope. Well debunk the never-ending myths, promotions, and products that needlessly stress toddler parents. Its time to optimize your little ones nutrition without losing any money, time, or sanity.

Your Toddler Still Doesnt Need Kombucha

Same rules apply, but now even more confusing marketing is heading your way. Dont worry, well get through it together.

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