About the Author
David J. Palmiter earned his PhD in Clinical Psychology from George Washington University in 1989 and his diplomate in Clinical Psychology from the American Board of professional psychology in 1996. David is a tenured Professor of Psychology at Marywood University where he also directs an outpatient mental health training clinic. He has a private practice in Clarks Summit, Pennsylvania, serves on the board of directors of both the Pennsylvania Psychological Association and the Pennsylvania Psychological Foundation, and is a state public education coordinator for the American Psychological Association.
Dr. Palmiter has written more than 30 professional publications, has given over 160 professional workshops on child clinical psychology across the country, and has more than 200 media credits, including for outlets such as O Magazine , U.S. News and World Report, Parenting, Los Angeles Times, and Womans Day . His professional writing has won a national award, his media work a state award, and his work within psychology a university award.
Dr. Palmiter lives with his wife of twenty years, Lia; their 3.0 children, Morgan, Gannon, and Lauren; and their neurotic Portuguese water dog, Dakota, in Clarks Summit, Pennsylvania. Dr. Palmiter's blog is
www.hecticparents.com. His Web site to support this book is www.reslientyouth.com, and his primary Web site is www.helpingfamilies.com. He can also be found on Twitter (@helpingparents), LinkedIn, and Facebook.
Acknowledgments
I would first like to thank those who supported this book coming to life. Im grateful to Dr. Julie Silver and her staff at Harvard Medical Schools annual writing conference for giving me the strategies and resources I needed for this journey. Im grateful to those who reviewed parts or all of previous drafts and offered helpful feedback: Karen Osborne, Dr. Lauren Hazzouri, Dr. Brooke Cannon, Dr. Lia Palmiter (my wife), and my wonderful and extremely effective editors, Karen Chernyaev and Karin Craig. I also am grateful to Dr. Ed OBrien who forwarded useful materials and to Joseph Patterson, Tanisha Drummond, and Sarah Killian who assisted me with some of the leg work. Lastly, I am grateful to the administrators and trustees at Marywood University who granted me a sabbatical in support of this project.
I would next like to thank the people who inspired me to write this book. I am greatly indebted to my clients and students: So much of what I have written in this book has grown out of your questions, challenges, strivings, and beauty; I would not be half the psychologist I am today without you. Second, and most importantly of all, I want to thank my wife and children: Your willingness to let me love you, and to love me back, despite my bountiful limitations, is the top blessing in my life.
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Chapter 1
Strategy One
Complete One Hour Each Week of Special Time with Your Child
Happy families are all alike; every unhappy
family is unhappy in its own way.
Leo Tolstoy , Anna Karenina
Parents often tell me that its difficult to make time to do healing interventions with their child. This is not because they want to make more time to watch American Idol or because theyre not deeply committed to parenting. Its because lifes obligations feel so overwhelming.