Emma Bunton - Mama You Got This: A Little Helping Hand For New Parents. The Sunday Times Bestseller

EMMA BUNTON

Mama You Got This

A LITTLE HELPING HAND FOR NEW PARENTS

Most of you know me for being a Spice Girl, but the achievement I am proudest of in my life is being a mum to my two children. This book is a celebration of your brilliantness for making and having your child. Wow!

Isnt that amazing? Yes, but its also pretty terrifying, and probably why so many of us reach for a book, just like you are doing right now, hoping it will tell us what to do and take some of this giant responsibility off our hands. If Ive learnt one thing about loving and caring for your own child, its that no one has the definitive guide. All of us are on our own paths, and you are quite literally the only expert in the field of you and your baby.

If you are looking for a how-to instruction manual, this book isnt going to help you. I wont pretend I havent tried plenty of them I bought every book on the shelf when my babies were born, but they all seemed to be too prescriptive. It was all sleep regimes and feeding schedules and rules for being a green parent or a free-range parent, or whatever kind of parent was happening that week. I was interested in all of those things, but I also didnt need something else on my to-do list. I had enough on my plate as it was, without feeling like I was supposed to be doing even more things, and getting those wrong too!

What I really, really wanted was a book I could reach for in the middle of the night, when I was so tired I could hardly open my eyes and the milk was pouring out of my boobs and the baby was having a big cry. A book that would give me the information and support I needed without judgement, without making me feel like a failure. A book that would give me honest advice, and might even make me chuckle occasionally. Basically, I needed a book that was also my best mate. But not in a fluffy or patronising way. I needed the kind of best mate who gives it to you straight, when your hair looks rubbish or your outfit isnt working.

Because even though I had all the real-life girl power of the actual Spice Girls on speed-dial, as well as my incredible partner Jade and my tireless mum Pauline, I still needed that extra reassurance, something to check in with, to make sure I was getting it right. Sometimes it felt a bit like even those nearest and dearest to me didnt always want to tell me the truth. Why had no one told me, for example, that breastfeeding could be painful or that I would still look pregnant two months after Id given birth? Why did no one tell me?! That was the question I asked most in those first few months and years, not always out loud.

Ive since realised that a lot of fibbing goes on in this motherhood game! I reckon its a survival strategy. Us women shield each other from the realities of childbirth and having babies, because, lets be honest, if we knew the half of it, we might not sign up for the job so willingly. And then where would the human race be?

Other times, people do tell you things about motherhood, but you dont really get what they mean. Or maybe you just dont want to hear it. People tell you that babies keep you up at night and youre going to feel tired, but you dont really understand quite how exhausted a new baby can make you feel, until you are living it. People tell you youll love your baby like youve never loved anyone before, but you dont really get it until they are in your arms looking at you like a genuine angel from heaven.

By the time Beau arrived in 2007, Id been a Spice Girl for over a decade. Some of the big worries new mums have today hadnt even been imagined yet: climate change still only happened in far-off lands and few people knew what a dairy intolerance was; even being a working mother was still kind of a novelty. Nonetheless, I felt I knew a thing or two about challenge. Id spent most of my twenties living life on what you might call a gruelling schedule: daily rehearsals and physical training, late night performances and long-haul flights (while also having the absolute time of my life with four of my best friends). Id performed in front of millions of people all over the world, met the Queen at Buckingham Palace and had tea at Nelson Mandelas house. I could deal with a baby, no problem.

Ha! Nothing could have prepared me. It wasnt just the sheer physical challenge of it all, but the knowing that I was responsible for this little bundle I had just made, and loved so unexpectedly fiercely. Despite all my experience overcoming nerves on stage and being in the spotlight, I surprised myself by being quite an anxious new mum.

I look back now and laugh at how I panicked over the littlest things. Like the time I noticed Beau had little red spots all over his face and phoned my health visitor, convinced hed contracted some kind of terrible plague. Theyre milk spots, she said calmly, totally normal. Try squirting some breast milk on them and they should go away. You want me to squirt milk from my boobs at my new babys face? Are you sure? But true enough, they calmed down with a little smidge of milk! Every day it seemed like something else unexpected would happen and send me into panic mode. When Tate came along four years later, I assumed I would feel more in control. I was a pro this time, right? But it turns out that a second new baby is a whole new riddle to figure out, when you havent even solved the first one yet. Id been a woman feeling at the top of my game for years, and yet here I was, quite often feeling like a nervous wreck. Where was the book that would tell me what I needed to know, without either glossing over the details or giving me a list of impossible rules to follow?

Its here! I wrote it for you, so you dont have to feel the same frustration when no one has told you that baby poo looks weird when they eat bananas or that changing bags are an entirely optional purchase. Im sharing my stories and experiences with you, so we can have a laugh and a cry together along the way. Im here in this book whenever you need me, night or day.

Ive never written a book before, so if youre wondering why Ive chosen this moment in time to share my story, let me give you some background.

In 2017 I launched the eco-friendly nappy range Kit & Kin. Ive learnt so much from creating it that I want to share. Why did I launch a nappy range? When I was a new mum there were two big issues that really challenged me; starting Kit & Kin was my way of trying to answer the questions I had back then, and helping others who might not have the answers now.

Eczema and skin irritation were big problems for both of my babies, especially Tate. As a family we spent a lot of time going back and forth to doctors about their skin, trying every cream and emollient out there, but everything seemed to treat the symptoms and not the cause. We didnt realise back then that regular disposable nappies and wipes contain chemicals and unnecessary skin irritants. It wasnt until much later on that I learnt that there were more natural alternatives that could do the same job and reduce the impact on babies skin.