Leigh Vickery - Food Family Style: Simple and Tasty Recipes for Everyday Life

I would like to pretend that mealtime at our house is always peaceful.

In my imaginary world that exists somewhere between Mary of the House of Jesus and Martha of the House of Stewart, I picture my husband and two teenage sons smiling and smelling fresh, seated at our kitchen table while I serve them a hot meal.

And although I don't actually wear any of these in real life, my dream outfit is a freshly pressed pleated skirt, pastel twinset, and a strand of antique pearls.

After appropriate oohing and aahing over the meal I created, we hold hands and take turns thanking God for his blessings. Equally as important, everybody chews with their mouths closed.

Alas, the reality is much closer to these recent real-life examples around our house:

I had forgotten to go to the grocery store the day before, and we were out of everything we usually eat for breakfast.

I said, We don't have any eggs. Or bacon. Or bread. Or milk. We're having beef tacos for breakfast. You liked them just fine last night. And you better be thankful. Remember there are kids all over the world who will not eat today.

My son hollered, Then send them the leftover tacos! I just want some American chocolate milk!

And another night, I was greeted with this as I put dinner on the table:

MOM, why did you make this again? You know I hate chicken chop suey! If you make me eat this, I will commit chicken chop suicide! (And no, this cookbook does not include the recipe for the dreaded chicken chop suicide.)

This next one might be the best. As I was finishing preparing a talk for MOPS International's convention in Nashville last year, my husband called upstairs to the office-slash-playroom, Leigh, supper is on the table. We're waiting for you to come join us.

This was my response, bellowed down the stairwell:

I don't have time to eat tonight! Don't you remember I fly out tomorrow to give my talk on the importance of family mealtime?!

Needless to say, as soon as the words left my mouth, I was busted. And the hoots and snickers from around the table downstairs told me how ridiculous I must have sounded.

Kids love it when Mom has to apologize, don't they?

But for all those crazy moments at mealtime, there are many wonderful ones we have enjoyed around our kitchen table. I don't think life feels any better than when we are eating togetherlaughing, talking, and letting our conversations wander where they will.

And although it doesn't seem logical that simply sharing food with one another would be as important (if not more so) as teaching your kids practical reasons to stay off drugs and to study hard in school, the evidence is clear. Children of families who regularly eat together are more likely to grow up into mature, responsible, and happy people.

But you don't have to take my word for it; there are countless studies coming out of Harvard, Columbia, and other prestigious research facilities that say eating together several times a week is one of the absolute best ways to help children stay on the right path, help marriages remain intimate, and even mend broken relationships.

The more often families eat together, the less likely kids are to smoke, drink, do drugs, get depressed, develop eating disorders, and consider suicide. The flip side is also true. The more often you sit down, eat with your family, and just talk, the more likely your children are to do well in school, delay having sex, eat their vegetables, learn big words, and know which fork to use.

In our home, we try to sit down together to eat at least four nights a week. Yes, it takes work to get everyone's schedule to somehow align and to get food on the table. And yes, many nights it doesn't work out as well as I imagined.

But we try, and I have seen that the more often we make time to eat together, the better our family relationships become. We have learned how to work together (when the boys are hungry enough, they don't mind helping!), we have learned better table manners, and we have learned so much about our boys' thoughts and ideas we might never have known.

And the laughter that comes from full stomachs and the sense of security a family can giveI wouldn't trade that for anything! Even without all the statistics and studies showing that the family dinner is a crucial part of our society, you know in your heart that when good food and laughter are around your table, it simply feels great. It feels right.

I could elaborate on why I think sharing food with people we love is so powerful, but Robert Farrar Capon, an American Episcopal priest and author, says it much better than I can:

For all its greatness, the created order cries out for further greatness still. The most splendid dinner, the most exquisite food, the most gratifying company, arouse more appetites than they satisfy. They do not slake man's thirst for being; they whet it beyond all bounds.

I have come to understand that time around the dinner table with people I love is sacred, and the table is our prelude to much better things to come.

One day, my hope is that you and I will be together, laughing and enjoying God's wonderful creation as we were meant toaround one big happy table.

I wanted to write Food Family Style to help you enjoy your time in the kitchen and your family's time around the table. Getting food on the table and everyone seated at the same time will always take work, but before you know it, your family will look forward to these momentsand the magic of meatloaf and mashed potatoes.

. Robert Farrar Capon, The Supper of the Lamb (New York: Smithmark, 1996), 18890.

I was in my car when I first received a phone call from Jean Blackmer at MOPS International. (My car really is my second home and office, complete with snacks, toilet paper, and internet service.) It was a dream come true to be asked to help create this cookbook for MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers). Well, to be honest, I had not even known to dream for an opportunity this extraordinary. I am grateful to my loving Father who knows how to care for me and bless me in ways I don't even know how to imagine.