Kay E. Payne - Different but Equal: Communication Between The Sexes

Cover

Page i

DIFFERENT BUT EQUAL

Page ii

This page intentionally left blank.

Page iii

Communication Between the Sexes

KAY E. PAYNE

Page iv

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Payne, Kay E., 1941
Different but equal : communication between the sexes / Kay E.
Payne.
p. cm.
Includes bibliographical references and index.
ISBN 0275965228 (alk. paper)
1. Sex role. 2. Interpersonal communication. 3. Communication
Sex differences. 4. Communication in sex. 5. Gender identity.
6. Feminism. I. Title.
HQ1075.P39 2001
305.3dc21 9831076

British Library Cataloguing in Publication Data is available.

Copyright 2001 by Kay E. Payne

All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be
reproduced, by any process or technique, without the
express written consent of the publisher.

Library of Congress Catalog Card Number: 9831076

ISBN: 0-275-96522-8

First published in 2001

Praeger Publishers, 88 Post Road West, Westport, CT 06881

An imprint of Greenwood Publishing Group, Inc.

www.praeger.com

Printed in the United States of America

The paper used in this book complies with the
Permanent Paper Standard issued by the National
Information Standards Organization (Z39.481984).

10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

Page v

Page vi

Page vii

Different but Equal: Communication between the Sexes really began when I started my studies as a doctoral student at Vanderbilt University, in Nashville, Tennessee. For my doctoral dissertation I needed to write about something for which I felt passion. Without passion I knew I would never complete the project. I decided to write about the role of the corporate wife in America. I played the role of corporate wife, married to a man who had assumed an important position for both the corporation and the family, while I also worked part time and took care of our three children. In my role as corporate wife I had struggled with a number of issues that had tormented me from the beginning of our marriage. I found all of my answers in faith issues, but I still wanted to understand and describe the secular perspective of my anxieties. What I discovered, simply put, astonished me! The doctoral dissertation was only the beginning of a life-changing adventure mirroring and encompassing the unique struggles of a whole society coming to terms with social change. The social change was reflected in confusion about restructuring role relationships, the retraining of people who wanted to have an active role in work and play, struggle with power issues between those who had and those who wanted to have, and shifting cultural symbols exemplified in the stories, myths, humor, play, ceremonies, and heroes of American society. This book reflects and describes the communication issues associated with that social change.

The book intends to incorporate the communication issues inherent in

Page viii

social change between the sexes at work and at home. In this regard, it provides theoretical and practical knowledge about gender differences in communication as offered in speech communication, business communication, and related disciplines. Second, it provides basic information relevant to service courses, organizational communication courses, and interpersonal communication courses. Third, the book acts as a useful resource for advanced courses in public speaking, communication theory, group communication, mass communication, sociology, and social psychology.

This analysis intends to present the reader with research and interpretive information from sources with a wide variety of expertise, understanding, and insight by using a pluralistic perspective. Frequently, gender communication books provide only a feminist perspectivedepicting females as victims, or females as oppressedwithout regard for the impact this has on relational communication. As the social pendulum moved to the extreme Left (liberal) in America during the 60s, 70s, 80s, and 90s, many advances were won for women, but often at the expense of relationships with men both at home and at work. As society began to devalue masculine men and revere masculine women, the social fabric of the country began to unravel. That unraveling of society emerged in the breakdown of the family: children killing children, drugs and violence in the streets and workplace, and the absence of real respect for people, which was replaced by legislated respect for others. The book is intended to move the pendulum back to the center, where we recognize and accept men who want to be masculine and women who want to be feminine, and all people in between. It does not take the point of view that suggests all people should be androgynous.