Vicki Hutchinson - Death by Choice: Living with the Impact of the Suicide of a Loved One

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I am currently 53 years old. I never married but came out as a lesbian about thirty years ago. I chose to have a career and a child. As a result of my lifestyle, My sixteen-year-old daughter has experienced both adversity and diversity.

I was born at the Victor Harbour Hospital and as a child I went to the Yankalilla Area School from grade one to the completion of year twelve. My original plan for a career was to be an art teacher as I loved to paint, but at the time was not accepted to study and chose nursing instead. I continue now to enjoy painting and my preferred subject is nudes.

I have been nursing for thirty-five years. The last twenty-five years have been specialising in the area of mental health. I have always been a very active and busy person with several projects going at a time. Our family has always loved fishing and each of us has continued that as we grew up.

About five years ago, I decided to breed French bulldogs. They are currently the great love of my life and although a very expensive hobby, they are extremely loving and entertaining.

I live in Victor Harbour in a double-storey house with a view of the islands, township and the sea. Since high school, I dreamt of having an art studio on a hill overlooking the sea and nearly thirty years later, I am living in a house on a hill, looking over the sea with my easel, canvasses and paints.

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First published in Australia 2014

This edition published February 2014

Copyright Vicki Hutchinson 2014

Cover design, typesetting: Chameleon Print Design

The right of Vicki Hutchinson to be identified as the Author of the Work has been asserted in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988.

The information in this book is based on the authors personal experiences and opinions. The publisher specifically disclaims responsibility for any adverse consequences which may result from use of the information contained herein.

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means without the prior written permission of the publisher, nor be otherwise circulated in any form of binding or cover other than that in which

it is published and without a similar condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser.

Hutchinson, Vicki

Death by Choice

ISBN: 9781742984599 (eBook)

Digital edition distributed by

Port Campbell Press

www.portcampbellpress.com.au

Conversion by

The inspiration to write this book came from my brother Philip. On several occasions, I had suggested he write a book about his life as he was a great storyteller, but he didnt see the vision.

Dear Philip, I hope the writing of this book recognised your suffering as well as your amazing life.

Evocative Production: Christopher Wong

Have you ever wondered where your life was heading and what it was all about? Do you know anyone who has had the perfect dream life? Are you old enough to experience time going faster every year and wishing it would slow down? I felt the healthiest and happiest when I was about twenty-eight years old. At that time I felt like life was forever and almost anything was possible.

I was born in February 1959. I was the eldest of three children. I had two brothers, with two years between each of us. I grew up with parents that did not drink alcohol, smoke cigarettes or have anything to do with illicit drugs or other related lifestyles. When the first man walked on the moon in 1969 we were sent home from school early and went to a neighbours place to watch it on their black-and-white television. At that time we didnt have a television. Family values and respectful behaviour seemed to be the accepted norm for most people when I was growing up. We had regular family functions with the entire extended family. Before I was ten years old we would meet most Sundays at my Grandpas old farmhouse at Back Valley. My grandfather died when I was ten and he was eighty-nine years old. I never met my grandmother. She died when my father was seven years old. His sister, the oldest in the family, raised them. My Uncle Murray continued to live with my grandfather in the original house that my father, his sister and four brothers grew up in. Uncle Murray never married and continued to live alone in this very old homestead without electricity or running water until his death in 1999, aged seventy-two. It was always such a culture shock to visit the old homestead and there was never ending memorabilia.

My mothers family lived in Melbourne and they were very different from the Hutchinsons. Nanna smoked like a train, and they all drank alcohol. Grandad was an army man and always scared me with the way he spoke whereas Nanna was very warm and loving. Nanna never wanted to grow old. She used to love to shop at the clothes shops for teenagers and she always dressed young.

When I left school I went to the city to do nursing and at that same time my parents moved from Wattle Flat to Victor Harbor. It was very exciting as Victor Harbor was like a city to us compared to Yankalilla. Wattle Flat is a small region between Myponga and Yankalilla in South Australia. We lived on fourteen acres and at the top of the property was the old, broken down Wattle Flat Post Office. When they moved, Stephen refused to change schools and so he left school and went shearing, and Philip attended Victor Harbor High School.

Victor Harbor is an historic whaling port in South Australia and today remains a very beautiful seaside town. Many tourists come to see the whales each year with their baby calves, who breed again before going south. They remain an amazing sight along the south coast performing for their audience. Like the size of a bus, gracefully they dance like ballerinas as they throw themselves into the air above the water. They dare to come within one hundred metres of the shore.