Janie Webster - Fingernail Moon: The true story of a Mothers Flight to Protect Her Daughter

Fingernail Moon
A S HAW B OOK
P UBLISHED BY W ATER B ROOK P RESS
2375 Telstar Drive, Suite 160
Colorado Springs, Colorado 80920
A division of Random House, Inc.

Published by arrangement with Doubleday and Hodder Stoughton, a division of Hodder Headline PLC.

eISBN: 978-0-307-55329-4

Copyright 1998 by Janie Webster

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying and recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publisher.

S HAW B OOKS and its aspen leaf logo are trademarks of WaterBrook Press, a division of Random House, Inc.

Star map illustration by Jackie Aher

Fingernail Moon was originally published by Doubleday in 1998.

The Library of Congress has cataloged the Doubleday hardcover edition as follows:

Webster, Janie.
Fingernail moon : the true story of a mothers flight to protect her daughter / Janie Webster.
p. cm.
1. Webster, Janie. 2. Kidnapping, ParentalUnited StatesCase studies. 3. IncestUnited StatesPreventionCase studies. I. Title.

HV6598.W43 1999
362.8297092dc21

[B] 99-19640

v3.1

Epilogue:
The Revenge of the Three Black Bags

To
Ellen Mari Michelle
and my parents

WHEN MY DAUGHTER AND I FLED A MERICA, STAYING WASN T AN option. Dropping everything to board a train and then a plane for an unknown destination, I did what usually only happens in the serendipity of dreams and fantasies. No return tickets were purchased. As sojourners, home was wherever we plopped our bags and rested our heads, sometimes for a week, other times for months.

The financial restrictions of our journey radically altered the comfortable lifestyle we had left behind. Becoming stranded without money was a constant concern. We survived to tell the story because of the unwavering support of my parents, Jess and Kathleen Webster. Even with sustaining financial support from them, our lifestyle was sometimes dispiriting and always exhausting. Their assistance kept us going and their prayers, united with those of friends in America and around the world, lifted us above whatever treacherous ground we traveled.

Writing this book dredged up painful memories that had begun to settle in the riverbed of my soul. As a chronicle of our fugitive years, this intimately personal book omits many particulars concerning the legal case, as well as descriptions regarding my daughters abuse. Since the abuse had been perpetrated by her father, my husband, someone she and I had loved, the pain embeds deeper in the strata of past experiences, cutting a wider swath for both of us. At more than one point during the writing, I bargained with God: Ill go around the world again if You will take away the pain of reliving this story. The encouragement of my editor and of my family and friends restrained mental flight, returning me to grapple with whatever I didnt want to write about. They patiently read the manuscript, offering helpful suggestions and heaps of You can do it. The book also passed the litmus test of my daughters scrutiny and benefited from her ideas.

Receiving little instruction on how to survive as a fugitive, I learned as I went. The intent of this book is not to be a manual on how to successfully flee with a child. Many events critical to our survival have been omitted. These omissions do not diminish the debt of gratitude I feel to people whose support helped us along our way. The outcome of our flight would have been quite different had it not been for the faithfulness of friends in the countries we visited. In hindsight, some of the precautions may have been unnecessary, but at the time, they had seemed vital to our security. I dont judge anyone who decides not to run from an abusive situation, nor do I advocate becoming a fugitive to protect a child. My vision is to work for the safe shelter of children so that fleeing wouldnt be necessary.

Within the physical journey was hidden a spiritual one. Purposes nested within each other like boxes, all enclosed in the primary objective of protecting my daughter. Writing about the journey has been like uncovering box lids to reveal purposes, some understood better than others. When incidents such as arriving in a new country with no place to stay soured the journey, they were mitigated by the sweetness of observing Gods power to engineer circumstances for our good. I saw firsthand (and continue to see) Gods unique ability of transforming difficult circumstances into intriguing results. Although my daughter and I would not have chosen such a journey at the outset, neither of us would trade our experiences for anything. Now that the physical journey has ended, the spiritual one continues, affirming that God can be trusted.

AS M ICHELA AND I WAIT IN THE SNAKING LINE AT THE A MERICAN Express office in Brussels, I refuse her request to sit near the travel brochures. She must be within arms reach in case a quick departure is necessary. Panic paralyzes swallowing when I imagine the consequences if the Moneygram transaction fails. I possess only enough cash to fund a frugal return to Italy. My anxiety isnt lessened by the hysterics of an American woman who has lost her Travelers Cheques. Leaving the American Express office, she beats her head with her hands and wails at her husband, who quietly looks at the floor, either from embarrassment or remorse.

By the time I step up to the agent, my throat is collared by fear, making speech difficult. Handing over my passport, I explain that a Moneygram from the States has been sent in my name, the designation being international. The train of thought derails abruptly when the tracks end. No plan exists for safeguarding these Travelers Cheques from being traced; cashing them could leave a crumb in the forest trail to our whereabouts. Acting as if I have changed my mind about the Moneygram, I ask to speak to the office managerprivately.

Michela and I are directed to an office where he listens as if Im the fifth fugitive to cross his path this day. Without emotion for our circumstances, he advises how to avoid having the numbers of the Travelers Cheques traced. If larger denomination checks are requested when receiving the Moneygram, they can be exchanged for lower denomination checks with no cross-referencing. The transaction, which is free of charge, makes tracking the original check numbers impossible, particularly when the checks are exchanged at another American Express office in a different country.

Although the managers apparent lack of interest in our plight is reassuring in one way, his purpose may be to keep me calm and settled until the police arrive. At the counter, I watch the actions of the agent like a hawk, intent on noticing whether her fingers type numbers from my passport into the computer. Retrieving my passport would require lunging over the counter to snatch it before grabbing Michelas hand and running into the street.

After a reasonable number of questions and giving a bogus address in Kentucky, the Moneygram comes through without a hitch. Desperate to flee the location where our global position is momentarily nailed down, I must remain on the spot to sign the checks. I request as many $500 Travelers Cheques as available to avoid signing $10,000 worth of $20 checks. This large sum of money from my parents doesnt come to us from their surplus, but from their limited retirement savings. The fingernail moon is indelibly stamped on every check, reflecting their pledge to be there for us, whatever the sacrifice.