Malcolm Duffy - Sofa Surfer

SOFA

SURFER

Me Mam. Me Dad. Me.

SOFA

SURFER

Malcolm Duffy

AN IMPRINT OF HEAD OF ZEUS

www.headofzeus.com

First published in the UK in 2020 by Zephyr, an imprint of Head of Zeus Ltd

Copyright Malcolm Duffy, 2020

The moral right of Malcolm Duffy to be identified as the author of this work has been asserted in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act of 1988.

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without the prior permission of both the copyright owner and the above publisher of this book.

This is a work of fiction. All characters, organizations, and events portrayed in this novel are either products of the authors imagination or are used fictitiously.

A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.

ISBN (HB): 9781786697677

ISBN (E): 9781786697660

Cover design: gray318

Head of Zeus Ltd

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London EC 1 R 4 RG

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For Jann

People drown, quietly, before our eyes, all the time.

Ilsa J. Bick

You never forget the day you lose your home.

I lost mine on a Tuesday.

Id been doing maths homework. Evaluating exponents. Torture.

Tyler, shouted Mum.

What? I grunted, more to me than her.

Tyler, she cried again.

Guess it must be dinner. Or Ive left a shoe lying around somewhere. Not bothered, really. Anything that stops maths is good to me. I closed my books, went downstairs, and looked in the dining room. Nobody there. No knives or forks or placemats out. Must be something else.

Were in here.

I dragged myself into the sitting room. As soon as I set foot inside I knew something wasnt right. For a start, Mum and Dad were sitting, squidged tight together on the sofa, holding hands and smiling: something they only do when theyve been drinking. What made it stranger was that they didnt seem relaxed. They were perched right on the edge, as if there was something exciting on TV, which there wasnt. It was Sky News, with the sound off.

Sit down, said Dad.

I flopped on to a chair. Tallulah, my little sister, was already sitting cross-legged on the floor. The air was crackling with anticipation. For the first time ever I realised that the gold clock on the mantelpiece made a ticking sound.

Whats happened?

Its not whats happened. Its what will happen, said Mum, squeezing Dads hand, as they looked at each other with faces still debating whether to be happy or sad.

Were going to move, said Dad. From his voice, from his expression, from his body language, from everything, I got the impression I wasnt going to like what came next.

Up north, said Mum.

The oxygen level in the room dropped as Tallulah and I took in two extra-large portions of breath.

Up north? said Tallulah.

Mum and Dad nodded in unison.

The clock on the mantelpiece could not have ticked any louder.

Why? I asked.

Ive been offered a job in Bradford.

Wheres that? said Tallulah.

Yorkshire.

Wheres that? said Tallulah.

They clearly werent big on geography in Year Four.

Its a big county. Up past Gran and Grandads house.

I stared at the TV. The presenter looked as if they were in a fish tank, mouthing silent words. I half-expected a banner to appear along the bottom: Breaking news: the Jackson family to leave London. Id once got hit smack in the face by a ball in the playground. My parents announcement was comparable to this.

Tick. Tock.

Over the last few months Id heard them talking about properties and job opportunities and stuff like that. But thats all I thought it was talk. Didnt for one second think the talk would actually turn into anything meaningful, like action. Mum and Dad arent exactly the intrepid type. Dads an accountant. His big love is golf, which is also his big hate, judging by the look on his face when he comes back. Mum works in HR, which I think is where you deal with people who hate their jobs. So why did they have to go and be vaguely adventurous?

Well, say something, said Mum.

But its hard to find words when your brains out of order.

I finally found one, hiding in a corner.

When?

Mum took a big breath. Your dad starts work in three months. Im going to find a new job. In the meantime well start searching for a new home.

Tick. Tock.

But weve got a home.

Mum and Dad swapped looks, as if to say, Whos going to take this one? Mum stepped up to the plate.

Tyler, your dads been given a great opportunity. Were both really stressed out working in London. Itll be a new start for all of us. Also, the air quality heres not getting any better. Itll do my asthma the world of good to get out of town. And well be nearer Gran and Grandad in Derby.

Shed obviously been working on that list.

And then theres the crime, she continued.

What crime?

Its all around us. A boy got stabbed in Richmond last week.

Three stops away on the tube. Big deal.

It was a pretty big deal for his parents.

Mum gets worked up about stuff like that. Even cries at the news sometimes.

Where will we live? said Tallulah.

Well find somewhere nice, said Mum, smiling at Dad for support. Maybe a village somewhere.

A village? I spat, with as much disgust as I could muster.

Or a small town.

I dont want to go.

Lots of families move.

Lots of families stay put. I want to stay here.

Dad looked at Mum, as if to say, Told you hed be a nightmare.

Youve got to give it a chance.

But I didnt want to give Yorkshire a chance. I didnt want to give anywhere a chance. I wanted to stay here. Where I live. Id heard enough. Got to my feet and stomped towards the door.

Tyler, exclaimed Mum. We havent finished.

But I had.

Went upstairs as noisily as I could, kicked open the door to my room, swept all my maths books off my desk and fell backwards on to my bed. How could they do this to me? Ive got everything I want here. Everything. My squad: Ben, Asher, Tom, Lucas, Reggie, Mason. Brentford FC, a bus ride away. A school I dont hate anywhere near enough to want to leave. And last but not least, Ive got London, the city with a squillion things to do. The place everyone wants to move to. So what do we do? Leave it for some crumbling village, up north.

I put my hand against the wall. I dont think its possible to love a wall, but I loved this one, and the three I couldnt quite reach, and the bedroom door, and the floor and the windows and the ceiling. It wasnt the greatest house in the world, but I suddenly realised how much it meant to me. It was part of my life. A picture popped up in my mind. Me in the hall, in a Moses basket, one day old. Its the only home Ive ever known.

I took my hand off the wall and put it to my face. The cool felt good. My face was burning. Didnt think I could get emotional over a house, but thats what their news had done to me. Tears began to escape. They didnt want to go to Yorkshire either. They wanted to stay here, where they belonged. But I knew deep down it wasnt going to happen. Id seen the looks on Mum and Dads faces. Theyd made their minds up. We were leaving.