Josh Floyd - Resilience: How To Turn Adversity Into Strength

RESILIENCE

This edition copyright Summersdale Publishers Ltd, 2019 First published as The Little Book of Resilience in 2016

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Introduction

Life has its ups and downs, and knowing how to adapt to adversity is essential to our health and happiness. Resilience is the ability to bounce back from the difficulties we all face. The good news is that psychologists have identified methods and strategies that enable us to navigate through crisis and overcome misfortune. This little book is packed with encouraging quotations and simple tips to help you build your inner strength and weather the tough times with hope and resolve.

LOOK FOR THE SILVER LINING

Mentally strong people have the ability to see the positives in tough circumstances. Rather than seeing the world through rose-coloured glasses, they recognize that its possible for good things to come from hardship. This doesnt erase the hardship, but it can make it easier to cope with. The next time you face a challenge, ask yourself, What can I learn from this? What is this an opportunity for? How can this positively affect me?

Every day you may make progress. Every step may be fruitful.

Winston Churchill

Make It a Habit

Mental toughness or grit can be cultivated. Think of it as a muscle that needs to be worked in order to grow stronger. To exercise your grit muscle, push yourself in small ways on a daily basis. Resist the snooze button in the morning and get up and go for a run. Turn off the TV and write a paragraph of the book youve been saying for ages you want to write. Move the trickiest task to the top of your to-do list at work.

By practising mental toughness in tiny ways, you will prove to yourself over and over that you have what it takes. Mentally tough people are not more intelligent or talented than the average person; theyre more consistent. Practise grit on a regular basis. Good things happen at the edge of your comfort zone.

WHEN YOU COME TO A ROADBLOCK, TAKE A DETOUR.

Mary Kay Ash

However long the night, the dawn will break.

African proverb

Focus On Your Strengths

Many people base their sense of self-worth on external factors such as what others think of them or what job they do. As a result, their confidence is extremely unstable an off remark or a bad day at work can cause their self-esteem to plummet. The key to resilience is to base your sense of self-worth on who you authentically are.

One way of doing this is to identify and focus on your unique strengths. Think of a time when you did something you were really proud of. Now think about the strengths, skills and talents you used to make this happen.

These are your signature strengths. Know that you carry these with you wherever you go. You can deploy these strengths whenever youre faced with a challenge, such as moving home, starting a new relationship or changing career. Embracing your strengths will give you confidence in your ability to handle any challenge that comes your way.

There was never a night or a problem that could defeat sunrise or hope.

Bernard Williams

CHOOSE YOUR RESPONSE

We all experience bad days and crises in our lives, but how we respond to these situations is up to us. When something bad happens, we can choose to react negatively, or we can opt to remain calm and look for a solution. Often our reactions are habits weve fallen into. Its important to realize you always have a choice. When faced with a setback, pause for a moment and consciously decide how you would like to respond.

FIND YOUR CALLING

A sense of purpose can enable us to overcome challenges which might otherwise overwhelm us. It can give us the determination to keep going, despite discomfort. This is best summed up by a quote from the philosopher Nietzsche: He who has a why to live can bear almost any how. To find your purpose, identify what youre drawn to. Which moments make you feel authentic, as if you are doing something you were truly made for?

Perhaps you have experienced this feeling when organizing a charity event, nursing a sick animal, or creating a work of art. You may have also experienced flow, which is a state in which youre so immersed in what youre doing that time seems to disappear. Look at what gives your life meaning and trust what your heart tells you. A strong sense of purpose will fill you with motivation and enthusiasm, and help you to transcend the ups and downs of life.

Do not be embarrassed by your failures. Learn from them and start again.

Richard Branson

The bamboo that bends is stronger than the oak that resists.

Japanese proverb

If at First You Dont Succeed...

It is continuous effort not talent or intelligence that holds the key to success in life. Successful people understand this. As a result, they are action-oriented. Of course, sometimes it makes sense to quit, but dont make the mistake of giving up too early. Walt Disneys first animation company went bankrupt and he was reputedly turned down 302 times before he got financing for creating Disneyland. Equally, J. K. Rowling was, in her own words, as poor as possible before she found success with Harry Potter, but only after 12 publishers rejected her manuscript.

Ask yourself, are you looking for a quick fix? Do you have a tendency to give up when things get tough? Or do you persevere and keep trying to find a way to make things work? Commit to keep going until you reach your goal.

IF YOU LEARN FROM DEFEAT, YOU HAVENT REALLY LOST.

Zig Ziglar