Schab - The self-esteem habit for teens: 50 simple ways to build your confidence every day

An excellent readfull of guidance and practical, ageless wisdom for teens who are looking to better themselves.

Robert W. Hasselmann, MA, middle school teacher, Robbins, IL

As with other books written by the author on this subject, this is easy to read, makes sense, and easy to apply with my clients individually, in group settings, or in family therapy sessions. My clients ages range between ten and twenty-three, and many are at-risk youth, children, and families. I like using the book for ideas to assist clients who struggle with depression, bullying, and anxiety. They find the information applicable as they read and journal, and we process new skills. The information is therapeutic and backed by empirically sound research. This is not merely a self-help book. This book is a great tool Ive added to my counseling toolbox.

Nancy DeWeese, MAMHC, LPC, family therapist with Professional Services Group

Excellent resource that can be used by everyoneyoung and old! Perceive it, believe it, achieve it! is a thought and activity process in the book that can be used in every area of life. In addition, the fifty simple ways to build confidence are just thatsimple. Finally, the exercises are easily personalized for each person. Highly recommended! Great workbook!

Kim Kanish, blended case manager, Family Psychological Association

Lisa Schabs The Self-Esteem Habit for Teens is a well-articulated definition of self-esteem and how a teen can acquire and strengthen it in their life. Its really simple and easy to follow, builds on itself, and its not boring. This manual is a must-have for any teen who wants to feel good about themselves.

Edward J. Nekarda, LCSW, BCD, MDiv, psychotherapist in private practice, attention deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) specialist, and certified rapid trauma resolution therapist

A wonderful resource and guide for all ages. The exercises in this book are easy to follow and there is something to appeal to almost everyone looking for a self-esteem boost or reset. I finished reading with the thought that I wish I would have had this when I was a teen.

Ann Almgren, president at Harvard Diggins City Library Board, Harvard Diggins Library, Harvard, IL

Publishers Note

This publication is designed to provide accurate and authoritative information in regard to the subject matter covered. It is sold with the understanding that the publisher is not engaged in rendering psychological, financial, legal, or other professional services. If expert assistance or counseling is needed, the services of a competent professional should be sought.

Distributed in Canada by Raincoast Books

Copyright 2017 by Lisa M. Schab

Instant Help Books

An imprint of New Harbinger Publications, Inc.

5674 Shattuck Avenue

Oakland, CA 94609

www.newharbinger.com

Cover design by Amy Shoup

Acquired by Tesilya Hanauer

Edited by Karen Schader

All Rights Reserved

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data on file

This book is dedicated to my great-grandfather Louis A. Wiemann (18541934), a wise and successful manwith healthy self-esteem!

My Philosophies of Life

by Louis Wiemann

Be good. The straight path is the only path that leads to Health and Happiness.

Do the best you can with your own faultsas nobody is perfect.

Associate with happy people.

Look at Life from the right angle and remember that on the whole your disappointments most likely were beneficial.

Have a Plan in Life and a Hobby.

Use one thing to balance another.

If you are a mental worker choose a Hobby which requires exercise and vice versa

Change your surrounding sometimes.

If you dont travel, alter the interior of your house, office, et cetera

Belong to some club.

Belong to some religion.

Believe in people. Dont allow any of your disappointments to destroy your faith in people.Contents

Get Started: The First Six Steps to Healthy Self-Esteem 1

part 1: Positive Thoughts 17

1. Recognize Your Power 19

2. Claim Your Value and Worth 22

3. Understand and Release Devaluing Messages 26

4. Choose Positive Self-Messages 30

5. Adjust Your Attitude 33

6. Practice Gratitude 36

7. Celebrate Your Strengths 39

8. Embrace Your Differences 43

9. View Yourself with Compassion 46

10. Learn from Your Mistakes 49

11. Compare to Yourself, Not to Others 52

12. Love Your Body 55

13. See Infinite Possibilities 58

14. Focus on the Present Moment 61

15. Avoid Overgeneralizing 65

16. Dont Take Everything Personally 68

17. Believe in Abundance 72

18. See the Bigger Picture 75

19. Eliminate All-or-Nothing Thinking 78

20. Realize No One Has a Perfect Life 81

21. Think from the Facts, Not the Feeling 84

22. Know Its Okay If Not Everyone Likes You 87

23. Refuse to Have a Pity Party 90

24. Accept Your Journey 93

25. Find More Than One Source for Self-Esteem 96

part 2: Positive Actions 99

26. Get to Know Your Authentic Self 101

27. Live from Your Authentic Self 104

28. Use Mindful Breathing to Stay Calm and Clear 107

29. Manage Your Feelings 110

30. Learn to Tolerate Discomfort 114

31. Set Realistic Goals 117

32. Increase Your Peace 120

33. Use Problem-Solving Skills 124

34. Make Positive Decisions 127

35. Act with Conviction 130

36. Take Responsibility Instead of Blaming 133

37. Work with Your Weaknesses 136

38. Face Challenges Head-On 139

39. Turn Things Around 143

40. Practice Basic Social Skills 146

41. Act Assertively 150

42. Set Healthy Boundaries 153

43. Choose Friends Who Value and Respect You 156

44. Run Your Own Life 159

45. Surround Yourself with Positivity 162

46. Move Your Body 165

47. Try New Things 169

48. Wear a Smile 172

49. Look the Part of Healthy Self-Esteem 175

50. Ask for Help 178

Ending Notes 181

Acknowledgments 183

Welcome to this book! If youre here because you want to feel good about yourself, youre in the right place. This book will teach you the thoughts and actions that build healthy self-esteem. You can actually make a habit of feeling good about yourself. The only requirements are desire and practice. If you want healthy self-esteem and you continually practice making the choices that produce it, you can achieve it.

The six steps described in this chapter will give you the foundation you need for reaching your goal. The steps are progressive, so its most helpful to learn them in order. Understanding step 1 will give you information you need to use step 2. When youve learned step 2, youre better able to practice step 3, and so on. These six steps give you a base of information to fall back on as you practice choosing new behaviors. Theyre the first part of your path to healthy self-esteem.

The rest of the book takes you further down the path, teaching the thoughts and actions that build healthy self-esteem. You can use these tools just about any time, anywhere, and in any situation; all you need is yourself and the decision to try. The more often you use them, the more effective theyll be.

Whether youre starting out on pretty good terms with yourself or youve never had healthy self-esteem before, take a minute now to consciously open your mind to the possibility; plant the seeds for a deep knowing that this can happen for you. Create a new space within yourself where your healthy self-esteem is going to grow. Then, take the first step