EFFECTIVE
COMMUNICATION SKILLS
The Nine-Keys Guidebook for Developing the Art of Persuasion through Public Speaking, Social Intelligence, Verbal Dexterity, Charisma, and Eloquence
Dale King
Copyright 2020 by Dale King - All rights reserved.
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Table of Contents
Introduction
First off, I would like to thank you for purchasing Effective Communication Skills . You have made the best first step that you could to reach amazing communication skills.
It seems that everybody finds communicating hard to do, especially effective communication. Im not going to lie; it can be depending on the situation that you find yourself in. This book is here to help get rid of all of those communication problems.
First off, we are all social creatures, so its important to understand how communication works on a mental level. You wouldnt think that there were a bunch of little things at play while you are talking to somebody, but there is. Thats the first thing we are going to go over, which Im certain you will find interesting.
Then we will go over the five levels of communication. Just to give you a quick preview, the five levels are verbal, physical, auditory, emotional, and energetic. Well look at how that plays out in effective communication.
Then we will dive into the art of persuasion. There are many different things that play into being a persuasive communicator, such as body language, and we will go over these things to help you become more persuasive.
Next, we will look at how to manage a conversation. This doesnt mean that you will constantly talk and be in control of the conversation at all times. This simply means that you know the right time to talk and the right time to listen. Listening tends to be the hardest part of communication.
Then we will look at where empathy comes into play. Empathy is a very important skill that a lot of people lack when it comes to being an effective communicator. Empathy plays a big part in understanding your audience, but the great news is, you can learn it.
Then we will look at verbal dexterity. Being able to speak eloquently is just another muscle that you have to work, so you can change even if you stumble when you talk.
Next, well go through the best way to share your ideas and stories so that you dont end up losing your audience interest. This may be the biggest reason why people just dont even try when communicating. They are afraid that they are going to come off as boring, but it doesnt have to be that way.
Next, we will look at the best tips for effective communication in relationships. Communication is often the number one problem between couples, but with a little foresight, you can prevent those problems.
Lastly, we will look at eloquence. This is what we are aiming for after all, isnt it? We want to be an eloquent speaker, and thats exactly what you are going to learn.
Now, enough with the introductions, lets get into what you are really here for.
Chapter 1: How the Human Mind Works
Picture this. There is a device that could record every memory, idea, and dream in your brain and then send the entire contents to another person. This sounds game-changing, right? The truth is, we already have this type of technology; it is known as effective storytelling. The life of the human revolves around the ability to share experiences and information.
Being able to communicate well is all a matter of getting in sync with other people. You may have even noticed this. Maybe you have seen where people start matching steps as they walk, or how they imitate the gestures of others as they talk, or use grammar or phrases that the other person uses. But this syncing up doesnt just happen in peoples mannerism or speech. It also happens in parts of the brain. This is what is known as neural coupling, and scientists believe it is an extremely important part of communication.
In one study on the functions of the brain, while communicating, scientists had a person tell a 15-minute story while also having the brain scanned with an MRI to record all of the activity in the different regions. They took this recorded and played it for 11 volunteers while they were having an MRI. As they listened to the recorded, their brain activity matched up with the storytellers.
This is a great way of looking at the brain during communication, especially considering there are quite a few studies that look at the brain. This doesnt give us a good idea of what the brain does during communication because it takes more than one person to have a conversation. It also does a good job of showing that listening and talking arent two separate activities. The neural coupling takes place in the production and comprehension parts of the listeners brain.
Whats even more interesting is that the firing in the brain regions happened first in the listener. That means the listeners brain is acting in anticipation of what the speaker is going to say. They were priming their self, so to speak, as what they were expecting to hear. The more accurate these predictive anticipatory responses were in the listener, the better they were able to understand the story. This means that if what the speaker says goes completely against what the person was expecting, the listener is going to be less likely to understand what is happening or they could just stop listening altogether.
In the 1930s, Sir Frederic Charles Bartlett performed some interesting experiments. Through these experiments, we have learned that listeners will fill in details about the things they are hearing. We also know that a persons memory of the speaker doesnt distinguish between the things they heard and what their brain told them.
In Bartletts studies, he had students read a folktale and then asked them to retell the story. They would end up adding some details. For example, one part of the story said, That Indian has been hit, and some of the students would say that an Indian had been hit by an arrow, or that the Indian had been killed. They would also change some of the other unfamiliar facts. You can even test this on yourself. Pick a short story that you dont know and read it. Then, in a couple of days, record yourself retelling the story out loud. See how the two compare.
