Relationship
Bridge to the Soul
Relationship
Bridge to the Soul
Chris G. Moon
Copyright 1999 Christopher G. Moon
Revised edition 2017
All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without written permission from the copyright holder.
This publication is designed to provide accurate and authoritative information in regard to the subject matter covered. It is sold with the understanding that the publisher and author are not engaged in rendering legal, accounting, or other professional services. If legal advice or other expert assistance is required, the services of a competent professional should be sought.
Published by Vision Mountain Training, Inc.
www.visionmountain.com
Copy editing and proofreading by Harmon Chan Moon
Cover design by Jan Westendorp, Kato Design and Photo
Cover photo by Jennifer Squires Ross
eBook by tikaebooks.com
Library and Archives Canada Cataloguing in Publication is available
ISBN: 978-0-9684507-2-7 (epub)
ISBN: 978-0-9684507-3-4 (mobi)
ISBN: 978-0-9684507-4-1 (pdf)
Acknowledgements: I am happy to extend my most heartfelt appreciation to Su Mei for being my greatest teacher of life, love and marriage, my two children Harmon Chan and Tara Ming for inspiring me to always go further, and teaching me the meaning of emotional maturity, and a special thanks to Harmon Chan for his masterful editing and proofreading work, Chuck Spezzano for his undying support, as well as his groundbreaking Psychology of Visiona most profound psychological model, as well as his input on the Polarities and communication models, Jane Nelsen , for helping me be a more mature parent through her amazing book on Positive Discipline for Children, Terry Pratchett , whose books made me laugh when I wanted to cry, and who illustrated the difference between personal and important , Stephen Karpman for his timeless Drama Prison, Andreas Abele , my partner in crime, for keeping me motivated to keep working on this book, all of my promoters who helped me develop my gifts as a teacher and writer, and all of my friends, past and present , and family, living and dead , who taught me the value of being in heartfelt relationships.
Contents
About the Book
Based on the principles of personal accountability, and using intimate partnership as a template for all relationships, this book guides you step by step through the stages to which all your important relationships will take you. It explains the purpose of interpersonal conflicts and problems, why you might react to them the way you do, and how you can respond to these challenges in order to grow in emotional maturity, wisdom, love and true happiness. Relationship - Bridge to the Soul will challenge the traditional views on family, marriage and parenting, and open the door to seeing relationships in a whole new waythrough the eyes of your soul.
Your essential nature is one of peace, limitless creative potential, joy and love. Because human beings tend to forget, and lose touch with, their essence, life gives you opportunity after opportunity to remember your essential nature and bring it more into your everyday awareness. Many of these opportunities come through the important relationships in your life, appearing to you as moments of heart-to-heart connection, but many opportunities often appear as problems as well. Following the suggestions and guidance in this book, you can learn how to respond to the problems responsibly, and with an open heart, thereby not only transforming your relationship, but also helping you to remember your true nature. What follows after that is a life of abundance, awe, love, and gratitude.
With clarity, simplicity, and humorand a small bag of practical toolsthe author provides you with a map through the relationship landscape, pointing out the opportunities, gifts and treasures, as well as the pitfalls, traps, distractions, unconscious defenses, and emotional eddies that make the relationship experience such an amazing adventure. By the end, you will understand, and be fully equipped to fulfil the true purpose of your most important relationships.
CHAPTER 1
THE GRAIL OF RELATIONSHIP
To seek a true and lasting relationship is, in fact, to seek ones Self.
Almost everyone in the world wants to be in a really great relationship. That may sound like an understatement, since many of our lives have been all but consumed by the seemingly endless saga of looking for someone, finding someone, losing or leaving someone, and then starting the whole cycle over again until we find our perfect mate (or die in the effort). And even when the search is successful, intimate unions can become a major preoccupation. After the initial excitement and hope can come periods of discontent and struggle, with complex emotional problems confounding even the brightest of minds.
The real source of these relationship problems often remains an unsolvable mystery because beyond merely looking for, finding, and keeping that certain someone, there is a hidden purpose at work. It might surprise us to hear that our relationship frustrations and problems are actually a hopeful sign, and in fact serve that hidden purpose. When, in my work, I mention that the emergence of pain in a relationship is actually a good sign, the response I receive is constantly one of surprise and disbelief. What possible purpose could be served by hurting each other? But this hidden purpose is not revealed until we become aware that by entering a relationship, we are actually taking part in a great quest.
From the very moment that we begin to look for someone with whom to intimately share our lives, we are usually unaware that the quest has begun for something that surpasses what we imagine is possible between two human spirits. That something is what I will call the experience of Truth through Partnership. Through this path of Soul Relationship, we are not just looking to fall in love; we are searching for an experience that will allow us to fall in love over and over again . Like valiant knights in search of a Holy Grail, we seek something in a relationship that fulfills a physical, emotional, and spiritual thirst. On the surface it may seem that we are simply lonely, or yearning to share meaningful feelings with a significant other, but in fact, behind every relationship, our souls are at work, guiding us to a spiritually satisfying experience.
This book is for those of us who are interested in experiencing close and/or intimate relationships, and want to receive more than mere comfort and companionship. We want the kind of partnership that will encourage us to extend ourselves past our preprogrammed limitations. We are looking for that which will enhance a greater sense of purpose and direction, and lend a trustworthy hand in times of our human trials. We are looking for a Soul Relationship.
And it goes beyond looking for what we can get from such a union. Through the path of Soul-centered Partnership we also crave the opportunity to give in ways we never have beforewith no selfish thoughts of reward or compensation. Instinctively, we seem to know that when we are truly in love we are happy, and when we are happy, giving flows naturally from us. We want to give unconditionally, because, on the deepest level of our being it feels right . Behind all our fantasies and romantic ideals, behind our inherent search for power, purpose or meaning, there lies that one desire: to know true, unconditional love. At first we may want to share this love with just one other personour chosen partnerbut the love that comes from Soul Partnership cannot be contained or limited; it must eventually extend itself to the rest of the world.