Above &
BEYOND
365 meditations for Transcending
Chronic pain and Illness
J. S. Dorian
CENTRAL RECOVERY PRESS
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Central Recovery Press, Las Vegas, NV 89129
2012 by J. S. Dorian
All rights reserved. Published 2012. Printed in the United States of America.
No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without the written permission of the publisher.
Publisher: | Central Recovery Press 3321 N Buffalo Drive Las Vegas, NV 89129 |
18 17 16 15 14 13 12 1 2 3 4 5
ISBN-13: 978-1-936290-66-6 (paper)
ISBN-10: 1-936290-66-9
ISBN-13: 978-1-936290-82-6 (eBook)
ISBN-10: 1-936290-82-0
Cover design and interior by Sara Streifel, Think Creative Design
January
January 1
The only journey is the one within.
RAINER MARIA RILKE
The words healing and curing are often used interchangeably, although they have separate and distinct meanings. Many of us have had to swallow the bitter reality that for now there is no cure for our condition. However, we can always be healed, through our own efforts or with the help of others.
What do we mean by healing, and how does it differ from curing? In the context of chronic illness, healing relates primarily to ones inner being, to the ways we strive to achieve healthy attitudes as well as personal and spiritual growth. As we progress in these areas, we can gain a positive perspective on our illness, our physical limitations and, indeed, on all of the dramatic changes that have taken place in our lives.
Inner healing can move us from resentment and self-pity to faith and acceptance. The healing process allows us to transcend our fears, to nurture hope, and to face adversity with serenity.
The essence of healing is self-acceptance, through which we affirm our wholeness no matter what our physical condition or how remote the possibility of cure.
THOUGHT FOR TODAY
I will be healed.
January 2
What loneliness is more lonely than distrust?
GEORGE ELIOT
Many diseases can be diagnosed rather quickly these days. Certain ones, however, remain elusive and require a considerable amount of detective work. As some of us have discovered, such hard-to-diagnose illnesses can present special problems.
When our symptoms came and went, increased and diminished in severity, and seemed not only mysterious but possibly imaginary, friends, loved ones, and even our physicians became somewhat skeptical. The longer the condition remained undiagnosed and unnamed, the more skeptical some of them became, and the more our own self-doubt grew.
Even now, months after we were finally diagnosed, certain people exhibit a degree of skepticism and mistrust. They raise an eyebrow, so to speak, when we describe our fatigue, pain, and limitations. And then its as though we are back in pre-diagnosis limbo, frustrated and infuriated.
Well do everything we can to help those people understand the seriousness of our illness. If it becomes clear that understanding is beyond their reach, well then do our best to let it go and move closer to those who do understand.
THOUGHT FOR TODAY
My priorities do not include convincing skeptics or defending myself.
January 3
We, by our suffrings, learn to prize our bliss.
JOHN DRYDEN
As we used to know physical pain, it was something that could always be fixed, not unlike a faulty toaster. We had a rude awakening when chronic pain entered our world and threatened to overpower us.
We discovered that doctors cant always determine the cause of pain. Even when technology such as myelograms and CAT scans makes it possible to pinpoint the source and cause of pain, technology cant always relieve pain entirely. So it seemed at first that this lingering pain would wring every bit of joy from our lives.
It has since become clear that there are volumes to learn about pain, and that there is much we can do to understand it, manage it, and limit its influence. One of the most heartening lessons is this: Pain is not simply a physical problem that can be isolated and repaired like a burned-out bulb on a string of Christmas lights. Rather, pain is truly a systems problem involving mind, emotions, attitude, and inner spirit. This means that we need not suffer passively and endlessly; that we can regain control; and that we can marshal our inner resources to achieve transcendence.
THOUGHT FOR TODAY
My goal is not to fix pain but to manage and overcome it.
January 4
Differing but in degree, of kind the same.
JOHN MILTON
Every so often a sense of uniqueness comes over me. Recently, for example, in the waiting room of an orthopedic surgeons office, I felt profoundly different and totally alienated from the other patients who were waiting.
I remember thinking: None of them has the health history and combination of symptoms that I have. Not one of them can possibly understand the kind of life I lead, the problems I have, the difficulties I go through every day.
Not surprisingly, the longer I dwelled on my uniqueness the more desperate and disconnected I felt. I had to pull myself back to reality and take the power from those self-destructive thoughts. I did so by looking once more around the waiting room, carefully this time, focusing not on the differences I imagined, but on the similarities.
How can I say that my pain is more severe than anyone elses? How can I insist that my illnesses are more baffling, my symptoms more misunderstood, or my anger and frustration more intense? Why not, instead, concentrate on how much alike we all are, and as the result, benefit from wisdom shared, love exchanged, and hope renewed.
THOUGHT FOR TODAY
Focus on the similarities, not the differences.