A. Royden D’Souza - Playbook: For men

Hi, my name is A.Royden Dsouza. I was born on March 25, 1996, in Mangalore, a port city in south India.

I was always fascinated by ancient myths and legends, and started writing Atlantis when i was 20 years old.

I was inspired by the great writers like Rick Riordan, J. K. Rowling,

Christopher Paolini, J. R. R. Tolkien,George. R. R. Martin etc.

I aim to be one of the greatest fantasy writers of all time, but for that i will need your help.

So, please keep reading my books, and i hope you enjoy my work.

Thank you....

MY BOOKS:

ATLANTIS The Beginning (2017)

Upcoming

ATLANTIS The Awakening (2018)

WINGS of SHADOW (2019)

website : www.shadythree.com

instagram : www.instagram.com/shady_three

facebook : www.facebook.com/shadythree

The one thing you must ask yourself when you are in a relationship is that, Am I in this relationship because I actually love her or it's just because of external pressure?. Or are you with her just because you hate being lonely? If you are in a relationship for the above reasons, then it's doomed to fail.

The only reason why you should be in a relationship is if you love being with that person. Remember one thing when you get into a relationship, Romantic love or attraction is not enough to sustain a happy and healthy relationship.

As the relationship matures, you might not feel that head over heels love everyday, you might even feel annoyed at her, but you must know that relationship is not just about romantic love. It is about compromising, thinking what the other person wants before fulfilling your own selfish desires.

Remember one thing before you go down the road of relationships. Romantic love is going to fade away eventually, maybe in two years or five years or more, but true love, which is not based on attraction, but on commitment to the person who chose to be with you, that love is a choice. It might not be as good as the romantic love, because you have to take care of the other person without expecting anything in return. It might even feel like a chore, but you will get the rewards. This love is more meaningful and it will bring you true happiness. So my advice to you is, think before you get into relationship.

Don't get into a relationship because she is pretty, you will eventually get over her beauty too. Think whether you can actually spend a lifetime with her without the physical attraction. Only then take the step, if you are doing it just because of the romantic love, then things aren't gonna be that good down the path.

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Don't hold back

Don't hold back your feelings, especially when your partner is doing something that you don't like. You need to tell her so, or she will never know what she is doing wrong, and she will keep repeating the same mistake again and again. At first, you might hold back your reaction thinking that you will get her feelings hurt, but if she doesn't know that she is doing something wrong, she will keep on doing it, and finally it might lead to a bigger problem.

Don't suppress her identity

A relationship should not feel like a game of hide and seek. You should be completely open with each other. You should not feel the need to hide your true personality just for her sake.

Don't take away her freedom

I can't stress this point enough. There must be enough freedom in a relationship, but the freedom must come with responsibility. Neither of you should feel as if you are being tied down. A relationship should make a person better than what they were, not the other way round.

Don't invest too much

Do you feel like you are doing all the work to keep the relationship going? If there is no balance in investment, then the relationship becomes one sided. This will quickly lead to regret and resentment. If the person is ready to receive everything from you and isn't ready to commit, then that is not love. It becomes a business.

Don't control her

This is another serious problem in a relationship. Trust me, you cannot make a person yours by trying to control them. It will have the exact opposite effect than what you think. The more you try to control a person, the more they will resent you, which will finally lead to hatred.

Do not smother her by telling her what to do. She might try distancing herself from you just to get some freedom.

Don't escape from responsibility

A happy and lasting relationship comes with responsibility. Both of you should be ready to accept your mistakes and shortcomings. It is your responsibility to keep her happy. And when something bad happens in a relationship, no matter whose fault, both of you should be ready to accept responsibility. That is how you can make your relationship last.

Don't criticize

Whenever you don't like something that she does or says, explain why you don't like it in a good way. Be gentle. Criticism will hurt her pride and might even lead to resentment.

Don't be too blunt all the time. Never criticize about things that they have no control over.

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Be empathetic

This is one of the most important rules. You must be able to understand your partner, what she is going through. Only with understanding and trust can you gain her loyalty. Imagine yourself in her shoes, and try to understand how she feels. Take your decisions based on this. Love grows by sharing experiences. Talk to her about your feelings and aspirations, and listen to her when she is talking to you about her feelings. This will show her that you really love her.

Avoid resentment

Proper communication is one of the best ways to avoid resentment. Whenever you don't like something about him, something that upsets or irritates you, like the way she looks at other boys or something like that, just speak up. Don't bury it, or it will only lead to resentment and hate later on.

Constant communication and clarification is very important in a relationship. Most people think that just because they are in a relationship, they don't need to communicate everything. But that is a wrong notion. Communication is one of the most important factors that help to build a strong foundation to your relationship.

Support your partner

You should always support your partner no matter what. When someone is saying bad stuff about her, always take your partners side. This is one of the most important things you must remember, because she expects you to be by her side. Don't let her down. Whenever she talks about her work or something like that, always be supportive and never reply negatively. If you don't take her side, then she will eventually stop sharing stuff with you and treat you like another pain in the ass.

Learn to compromise

As the relationship goes on, it will become more difficult and challenging, as more of your differences begin showing up. There might be clash of ideas. But you have to learn the art of compromising, sharing and caring. It requires practice, but remember, everything that is good doesn't come easily.

Be loyal

Loyalty is the base of a strong relationship. Be loyal to your partner. Even when you are with your friends, avoid criticizing your partner. It may seem like fun, but eventually it will decrease your respect towards her. Even if your friends talk negatively about her, stay clear of it or defend your partner. It is important that you be on the same side. Even when you are with your friends or family, stick up for your partner.