Smalls - Girl, Get Your Mind Right: the Tell-It-Like-It-Is Advice Your Love Life Has Been Missing

Preface
What I Have Learned

THIS IS THE OPINION OF TIONNA TEE SMALLS. YOU CAN CHOOSE TO not listen to any of the advice you read in this book, but your love life will remain the same; trust me. If youre one of the millions of women in the world who are tired of the games, the lies, the bullcrap, then take your hand and wrap it around this book. Girl, Get Your Mind Right! is now your dating and relationship bible. Now girl, get your mind right and be the lady you want to be: a warrior, bitch, a princess, or a superstar. Its time to get your mind right. You are what you say you are, and girlfriend, you can do everything that you say you can do. It is time to stop blaming him for your problems and it is time to figure out why you sleep alone in a bed big enough for two. The Girl, Get Your Mind Right! campaign has begun.

When I wrote the first version of this book I had been hurt really badly by loser men and I had a lot of anger. I was determined to save all the women in the world from the mistakes that I had made. I had the vision of helping women not fall for the okie-doke of a loser man. I thought all I had to do was tell my story and women would immediately step up their game and heed the advice. Now three years later, my life is much brighter and I can see that there are many good men out there. We just dont always see them. I also cant wave my wand and make all women take responsibility for their relationships. It isnt that simple. But with this new book and my new outlook, I am ready to do what I canand right here right now, we are going to start the Girl, Get Your Mind Right! movement.

Introduction
Girl, It Is Time To Get Your Mind Right!

I T IS TIME FOR YOU TO STOP FEELING SORRY FOR YOUR LOVE LIFE AND look into why you are attracting the wrong guys in the first place. We dont realize that most of the times we are in bad relationships because we want to be in bad relationships.

I learned a long time ago that life is all about choices and we live and die by the choices we make. If you choose to stay and stick it out with a loser, then thats on you. If you choose to try to change someone that you already know is not right for you, then thats on you, because it doesnt take a genius to know that people dont change unless they want to. Most of the women I meet are pretty good women who dream of finding the right man. They are beautiful, motivated, employed, and most of all, they want love. But they are looking for it in all the wrong places and many of them dont know what they want from a relationship. Some women say that they want a nice guy, yet they are the same ones who like when a man pulls their weave, smacks em up, and disrespects them. That right there is a contradiction in itself and a confliction of thoughts. He cant be nice if hes going to whip your ass (point-blank period). Its time for us women to know exactly what it is we want from the men in our life. If we want a good man, its time for us to get good ourselves. We have to understand that we are what we attract. If you are constantly attracting the wrong man; chances are you are giving off something that is allowing for these people to come into your life.

You also need to get rid of the super-save-a-ho attitude. Yes, I know you want to help a man and bring him up to your level, upgrade him but cant. You meet a guy with no job and then try to hook up his resum and send it out to employers for him. He doesnt have to do anything but wear a button-up shirt and go to the interview. Or you offer a man who suffers from walk-itis (my word for a man who doesnt own a car) a car. You try to make yourself feel better by saying, Oh, I just got him a hooptie. Yes, its a hooptie, but a hooptie is still a car; a car he didnt have until he met your nice ass. You got him the car thinking that he would be able to take care of his business better if he had a ride, but he doesnt do that. Like the guys who drive their girls car all day while shes at work, he uses that old automobile to take other chicks to work and to go and get his freak on at another broads house.

The sad thing is the game never changes, just the situations, and you, my friend, have been in the same situation time after time with guys who werent even worthy of smelling the coochie, much less being the main thing you live your life for. You gave a loser man mobility and there is nothing worse than that. He dupes you and you continue to ask yourself, Why me? not ever asking, Why not me? Sister, what are you doing to avoid getting into the same ish every time you meet a potential new boo? Ask yourself, are you giving up the booty too quick? Are you letting him know what makes you tick too soon? Or are you just falling for every guy you give your drawers up to? For most of us, one of these problems is the reason why we dont have a good man, and some suffer from all three of these love fallacies.

I am tired of women accepting bullcrap from these two-bit effing men. I understand its a man shortage and all, but its really time to put your Gucci-shoe-wearing foot down and say, No more. Its definitely more easily said than done, but right here, right now, we are all taking an oath of strength because we are all the shit and we all deserve better. Yes... fat, skinny, bald headed, it doesnt matter. You can step your game up and get yourself together and bag the man you want to have. Get him right, train him, and keep him as your man. Sit down and allow yourself to be tasted and enjoyed. Arent you tired of being duped and taken advantage of? I know you are, because your friends are tired for you. It is really time for you to be the chick you always wanted to be, because you, my friend, deserve it and the new you is reachable if you just take the time out and get you together.

You cant get the guy you want, be a good woman to a man, or be in a relationship with anyone if you are not the person you really want to be in life. You cant live up to other peoples standards or views about yourself.

If you know you havent quite loved yourself the best in a while, sit down and relax, because you are just a mere work in progress, and things will work out for you in just a jiffy as long as you be real with yourself and accept the things you do negatively within yourself. Now if he doesnt love and appreciate that, then its definitely his loss. When does a woman say, No more? Ladies, no matter how many men have done you wrong, your time is not up. I dont care how old you think you are, theres somebody out there for you, but you have to be ready for it. Yes, I said it, you have to be ready, because some of us wouldnt recognize a good man if he came and smacked us on the head with his penis.

The right man may be right under your nose, but are you mature enough to receive him or are you still running the hills looking for a man who you think may be able to one day be Mr. Right? Well, I am going to help you find Mr. Right and help you keep him. All men like coochie, and you, my friend, are the person who has it, but dont think you can snag that guy just because you have that coochie. You can only snag him if he cares about you and wants to be with you, and that, my friend, takes getting into that mans mental, and getting into a mans brain is one tough task, but you can do it if your game is tight.

It is time to get your mind right and you wont be happy until you make yourself happy. We often look at men to make us happy, but every woman who does this ends up unhappy. A man can never make you happy; besides, making you happy eternally isnt his job (believe it or not). Its your job, as you need to find joy outside of him and if hes the only source of your happiness, what are you going to do if hes gone? So lets get our minds right, each one of us, to heal ourselves, make us better women, and help all the little girls who look up to us.