Debrena Jackson Gandy - The Love Lies: 10 Revelations That Will Transform Your Relationships and Enrich Your Love Life

Sunrise River Press

39966 Grand Avenue

North Branch, MN 55056

Phone: 651-277-1400 or 800-895-4585

Fax: 651-277-1203

www.sunriseriverpress.com

2014 by Debrena Jackson Gandy

2014 Foreword by Kim Coles

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without prior permission from the Publisher. All text, photographs, and artwork are the property of the Author unless otherwise noted or credited.

All reasonable effort has been made to ensure the accuracy of the information in this book. However, due to ongoing research and discoveries, the information in this book may not reflect the latest standards, developments, or treatments. This book is intended for educational purposes, and is not intended to be all inclusive or to be a substitute for direct diagnosis and treatment by a qualified physician. Readers who have questions about a particular condition or possible treatments for that condition are advised to consult with a physician. The Author and the Publisher shall not be liable for any damages allegedly arising from the information in this book. The opinions expressed in this book are the Author's alone and not those of the Publisher. Whenever a person can be identified in this book, either that person or a surviving family member gave permission to the author for that persons story to be told in an effort to help you.

All trademarks, trade names, model names and numbers, and other product designations referred to herein are the property of their respective owners and are used solely for identification purposes. This work is a publication of Sunrise River Press, and has not been licensed, approved, sponsored, or endorsed by any other person or entity.

Foreword

by Kim Coles

When I met Debrena, I immediately knew that I had met a kindred spirit. I was introduced to her by her brother, a fellow comic when I was performing in Seattle a while ago. Her energy was contagious, her smile lit up the room, and she exuded grace and fabulosity! We reconnected a few weeks later and went on to have a great time collaborating on a successful inspirational on-line project together.

One of the things I love about Debrena is that she is the real deal. Shes authentic and transparent. As she takes you on this journey, she shares candidly from her own life. She doesnt claim to be an expert, but she is a messenger of 10 revelations about love relationships that change the game.

As I reflect over my relationships, I can see that when I wasnt clear about my worth, value, and self-esteem, I had disastrously unhealthy relationships. (Love relationships sure have a way of being a ruthless barometer of where we really are in our self-esteem.) So I attracted confused men, or confusing signals from men.

I also had that looooong What-I-Want-in-a-Man List, but couldnt figure out why the men I dated were what I didnt want in a man. I was caught up in a line of thinking about relationships and about men and myself that was typical, and a function of my social conditioning. I didnt question what Id come to accept as true and I couldnt understand why in this area of my life, things were out of alignment, and not consistent with the success I was experiencing in my professional life.

If The Love Lies had been available to me back then, I would have seen the light. Hallelujah! I would have been able to recognize the Love Lies in my beliefs and interactions with men. I would have seen the Love Lies alive and well in my hunt and seek mission to find The One/Mr. Right, even though Mr. Wrong kept showing up. I would have seen them in the futile search outside of myself for love and in my belief that a man could complete me or make me happy.

Now, all in one book, the toxic beliefs are revealed so that we can replace them with the Love Truths, and most importantly detox and heal ourselves. The Love Lies gets to the root cause of our relationship struggles and dysfunction.

Juicy love relationships are what Debrena calls rare air. Now that Ive done the self work, and learned to be honest with myself, I understand what intimacy really means. As Ive learned to love and value myself, Ive continued to attract a higher quality of men. I am now experiencing an amazing love relationship with a wonderful man, and it is indeed, rare air.

When I read The Love Lies, I knew that it was going to be the start of a Relationships Revolution, or more accurately, a Relationships Evolution for you and for me!

Get ready this is more than a book it is a Movement!

Acknowledgments

For me, writing a book is akin to birthing a baby. Like a baby, a new book is a creation that goes through a gestation period, develops in the creative womb, has a due date, and even has a birthing team. This book, especially, will always hold a special place in my heart because it had a 13-year gestation period!

Overflowing gratitude to my literary agent extraordinaire, Linda Konner, who was this book babys #1 advocate.

Kissing your feet with humble and profound thanks to my book proposal editor, Michele Brown, who was instrumental in helping me put into words what was in my heart.

Boundless thanks to my publisher, Molly Koecher, who is progressive in her thinking and her life outlook, and got this book and its message right from the start.

Kudos to the team at Sunrise River Press for being downright amazing (Connie I LOVE the cover design; Zac, thanks for masterminding the online strategy), and embracing the vision for this book.

Endless hugs and kisses to my editor, Ally Machate, who was this book babys spiritual midwife and birthing coach, and to Redessa Harris, my publicist, who caught the vision and helped me share it with the world.

A victorious high five to this books spiritual godmothers, Jolyn Gardner Campbell, Karimah Stewart, Cammie Clinton, Stephanie Jordan, Delayna Elliott, Deborah Nelons, Ericka Jackson, Dr. Thelma Jackson, Jacqueline Nash, Tamara Lumpkin, Angela Mack, Jada Pettigrew, Fralisa McFall, Erin Anthony, and Patrice Sidoione, for believing in this book and never letting go of the vision for it.

Endless gratitude to my readers, attendees, students, mentees, and participants over the years who have continued to read my books, attend my events, keynotes, and retreats, purchase my products and programs, and take my coursesand tele-seminars, year after year.

Abundant appreciation to the Inner Circle, my sacred group of best friends who are my prayer warriors and the wind beneath my wings. You know who you are.