Infinite Ideas - How to be seductive: A womans guide to being incredibly sexy

How to be seductive

A womans guide to being incredibly sexy

Infinite Ideas

Previously published in paperback as Seduce anyone

8. Why men love bitches

Everyones met them; theyre part of our daily lives. And weve all looked at the bitch with the guy hanging on her every word. What does he see in her?

Lets identify what a bitch actually is. It tends to depend on whos saying it. If a woman says it about another woman, it usually means she is tough, hard or cruel; if a man says it, it usually means he hasnt got his way. The second is probably the kind of woman who falls into the good bitch school, and all of us girls could probably take a few lessons from her.

From the word go we are brought up to believe that compromising, putting others first and being amiable will be the key to popularity and appreciation. Well, if you wash his socks and cook his meals its not going to take long before he confuses you with his mother. Now, the bitch may do those things but will also make sure as her partner would that it takes effort and that she expects appreciation, and maybe the odd Tiffanys box, in exchange.

The key quality a bitch needs to adopt in practice is the ability to say no. If you dont want to do something, dont go and do it and then seethe in quiet resentment. It makes you feel uncomfortable and your partner want to avoid you like the plague. Just get it out. The basic rule here is that you get what you ask for. If you act like you only need the scraps from a mans emotional table, you cant really blame him for not giving you a feast. Its not his job to second-guess you. If you are clear about your needs and communicate them in a pleasant, unemotional way you stand a better chance of getting what you want.

Heres an idea for you

Try saying no in all kinds of situations and see how it feels. Once you get into the swing of drawing up boundaries youll find it easier to stand your ground with a man you really like.

Defining idea

The thing women have got to learn is that nobody gives you power. You just take it.

ROSEANNE BARR, US comedian and actress

9. Message in a bottle

Alcohol, the great lifter of spirits, calmer of nerves and friend of the good times. If only that was all it did

We all know that alcohol affects the part of the brain that deals with inhibition. So while alcoholic drinks may make it possible for you to say a full sentence without stuttering when youre on a date, it may also be a rather embarrassing sentence. And 55% of communication is non-verbal so youll miss all the subtleties if youre hammered.

There are a few great tricks to ensure that you dont end up drinking yourself into a stupor. Make sure that you order water as well as wine with dinner and take alternate sips. If you are meeting for cocktails, dont order a martini but go for a longer drink, one mixed with fruit juice or soda. If you are going speed dating or to a party, dont arrive too early otherwise you are bound to start drinking to calm your nerves.

Now, there probably isnt a woman alive who hasnt woken up with a fuzzy head in the bed of someone they wouldnt have chosen as their dream lover if they hadnt had that last glass. This doesnt tend to do a lot for the self-esteem, so when you start to feel like your judgement is going, get a cab.

Safety is an issue you cant ignore. In the first place, the more you drink, the more risks you take. Secondly, if your date seems intent on filling your glass, alarm bells should be ringing. Of course, he may just be trying to keep things convivial but the phrase Are you trying to get me drunk? is a clich for a reason. Make sure that you pace yourself, despite his efforts.

Heres an idea for you

If you are unsure about a potential date, suggest something that doesnt involve night-time pursuits and see how you get on. A trip to an art gallery or a stroll through a park will let you see how you interact without the glamour an evening date can create..

10. Work it!

Sometimes a girl just has to be smart and sassy at 8 a.m. and gorgeous and sexy at 8 p.m. and there is no time to go home in between.

Dont panic. Prepare in advance instead. The night before go to bed early, having had a long bath, done your nails, waxed your legs, plucked your eyebrows and so forth. Get into bed wearing a moisturising mask and dont take it off, but leave it on all night its worth the messy pillowcase in the morning.

Next morning, have a shower, wash your hair and get ready for a normal day at work. Youll probably have at least an hour between leaving work and the date, so use it. Take the things you need in to work: make-up and cleanser, moisturiser, toothbrush, hairbrush, scent, deodorant, new underwear, tights/stockings and a change of clothes.

Once you have finished your high-powered day, you need to shake the office from your brain as well as your body. If you can find somewhere youre unlikely to be disturbed try some gentle stretching exercises. Stand up straight, reach your arms above your head and then breathe out as you reach for your toes. Breathe in once youre down there and clasp your ankles. Slowly breathe in as you bend your knees and breathe out as you straighten them, edging closer to the floor with each breath. Repeat this ten times and ignore any stressful thoughts that try to crowd your brain. Next raise your arms above your head, breathing out as you go up. Breathe in as you slowly lower your arms to your side. Repeat five times.

Now lock yourself in the ladies loo. Remove your old make-up and immediately apply moisturiser. Then wash under your arms and, if you can, also wash your feet (youll feel much fresher if you do this). Once youre washed, brush your teeth, apply your make-up, then change your clothes, brush your hair, spray on some scent and youre ready.

Heres an idea for you

Take another pair of shoes to the office to change into for the evening. Theres nothing quite as refreshing as taking off shoes you have been running around in all day.

11. Fitting in fitness

No one wants to go to bed with a slob. The biological basis of sex appeal dictates that we find fit-looking people more attractive.

Get into the habit of doing an exercise routine as soon as you get up. This involves 100 sit-ups, 50 lunges (stand up with legs together, stride one foot forward and bend the knee, then come back up to the starting position and do the same with the other leg) on each leg, 25 press-ups (on your knees if you cant do full ones) and some stretching. The sit-ups should be a mixture of different techniques. The lunges can be varied with alternative buttock clenches. Lie on your back with your legs bent and hip width apart. Raise your buttocks, squeezing them as you go up and simultaneously bring your knees together.

After youve completed your routine brush your body all over before having a shower once youre clean turn the water to cold and stay put for 10 seconds. Sounds terrifying, but youll get used to it.

So now youre set up for the day. Walk to the tube/bus/car clenching your buttocks as you go. At first this will make you walk strangely, but keep it up. At the office, shun the lift unless the man of your dreams is in there, and bound up the stairs; youll arrive breathless but with toned buttocks. Throughout the day, hold your stomach in. Youll look instantly better and its great for muscle tone.

Never waste a minute in your quest for a sexy body; in other words just squeeze everything at all times. Keep clenching your buttocks whenever you can, but make sure you dont scrunch up your face at the same time!

Heres an idea for you

Try these easy press-ups. Stand facing a wall with your arms straight and your hands on it, shoulder width apart. Slowly fall towards it and then push yourself back with your arms. Repeat this 35 times; its a great way to keep the upper body in trim.