David Borgenicht - The Action Heros Handbook: How to Catch a Great White Shark, Perform the Vulcan Nerve Pinch, Track a Fugitive, and Dozens of Other TV and Movie Skills

THE ACTION HEROS HANDBOOK

Warning: The skills taught within this handbook are meant for the use of true action heroes onlynot for evil geniuses, criminal masterminds, or bad guys of any type. If you fall into one of these categories, put this book down immediately and slowly back away from the register. (We have inserted a traceable microchip inside the binding of this book, so do not attempt to abscond with itwe will be watching you.) Although the information within comes directly from highly trained professionals in the situations at hand, we present it for entertainment purposes onlyuse it at your own risk. Moreover, we do not assert that the information presented within is complete, safe, or accurate for the situation you may find yourself embroiled in. The authors, the publishers, and the experts within hereby disclaim any liability from any harm, injury, or damage due to the use or misuse of the information contained within this book. Finally, nothing in this book should be construed or interpreted to infringe or encourage infringement of the rights of other persons or of any state, federal, global, or universal laws. All activities described should be conducted in accordance with the laweven if the laser is about to slice through your body armor.

The Authors

Copyright 2002 by Quirk Productions, Inc.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced
in any form without written permission from the publisher.

Library of Congress Cataloging in Publication Number: 2002091083

eISBN: 978-1-59474-585-0

Designed by Frances J. Soo Ping Chow
Illustrations by Larry Jost

e-book production management by Melissa Jacobson

Quirk Books
215 Church Street
Philadelphia, PA 19106
quirkbooks.com

v3.1

Action heroes are made, not born. Even those with superpowers and precocious talents had to start somewhere. After all, did you really think that Superman could always leap tall buildings in a single bound, that James Bond always knew to drink martinis shaken (not stirred), or that Indiana Jones was born with a whip in his hand instead of a rattle? Of course notevery action hero shows a clear aptitude for heroism, but needs guidance along the way.

In the beginning, every action hero is just an ordinary but good man or woman. The hero must first identify and then hone his skills and talents. Then, before he achieves hero status, hell have to overcome a series of obstacles (physical, emotional, or paranormal). And somehow, through the cumulative effect of his upbringing (good or bad), formative life experiences, an apprenticeship, and the occasional bite of a radioactive insect, his inner action hero eventually comes to the surface.

But even after hes saved his first dude or damsel in distress, or thwarted his first plot for world domination, there are times when the most accomplished action heroes still need a little help. No man or woman is an islandand this applies to secret agents, hot private detectives in cat suits, capable Vulcans and Jedi Knights, and rugged archaeologists alike.

Thats where this book comes in. This book truly is your guide to keeping up with the Indiana Joneses. Its the only primer on the essential skills all action heroes must know to survive and thrive in this dangerous worldGood Guy Skills, Love Skills, Paranormal Skills, Fighting Skills, Escape Skillsall from real experts in the subject at hand.

The skills we teach have all been featured in television shows and movies. But before now youve never been able to read a real-world, step-by-step, how-to guide to these skills. Let us reiterate: all of the information in this book is completely real. Want to know how to really catch a great white shark? To actually deliver a Vulcan Nerve Pinch? To spyproof your hotel room? To win a fight when outnumbered? To climb down Mount Rushmore National Monument? Its all inside. We spoke with FBI agents, sexologists, stuntmen, hypnotists, karate masters, criminologists, detectives, and dozens of other highly trained professionals to obtain real-world solutions to the kinds of situations that usually only happen to people with very cool names, unusually tight clothing, and few (if any) sweat glands.

So use the information wiselyand whatever you do, dont let this book fall into the wrong hands.

Read on, and good luckwere counting on you.

The Authors

CHAPTER 1
Good Guy Skills

THE MOST BASIC SKILLS an action hero needs are commonly referred to as good guy skills. These are the abilities needed to protect yourself from your enemies as you set off on your missionwhether youre entering a hotel room, driving a bus that has been turned into a bomb, or being held hostage in a Los Angeles skyscraper. You need these skills to protect yourself first, then to save others, and finally to catch the bad guys.

Before you start your training, you should decide how you like to work. Are you a loner, or would you rather have a buddy along? Are you a veteran, or do you need rookie guidance? Would you rather be in the line of fire or in the line at the wedding? Once youve answered these questions, youll better understand your limitations and be able to select which skills best apply to the situation at hand.

So read on and learnits a dangerous world out there, but with the skills youll master in this section, you should be able to make it out alive.

Nude Female Assassin (Luciana Paluzzi):Arent you in the wrong room, Mr. Bond?

James Bond (Sean Connery):Not from where Im standing.

Thunderball

The first stop on your mission is often the hotel where youll be stayingbut unfortunately, the hotel room is where the traveling action hero is often most exposed. And no matter what the movies suggest, you cant always expect an intruder to be a scantily clad femme fatale or Brad Pitttype who wants to engage in a bit of preexecution lovemakingthereby conveniently giving you the opportunity to sway her or his allegiance. (Although it does happen that way from time to time.) Be aware: maintenance and hotel workers regularly gain access to your roomand thus, so can your enemies. With that in mind, heres what to do, according to Shawn Engbrecht of the Center for Advanced Security Studies.

Ideally, you should be prepared to use some sort of implement (blunt object, weapon) in case you interrupt the intruder. Carry a flashlight or night vision goggles so that you wont need to fumble for light switches as you enter the room.

Step 1: Stand toward the hinge side of the doorframe, not in the center or on the side with the doorknob.

This stance will protect you from an attack immediately upon entry, or from a gun fired at the door from inside the room.