Kevin Leman - 7 Things Hell Never Tell You. . . . But You Need to Know

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7 Things Hell Never Tell You... But You Need to Know

Copyright 2007 by Kevin Leman. All rights reserved.

Cover photo copyright by Taxi / Getty Images. All rights reserved.

Interior photos by Photos.com. All rights reserved.

Author photo copyright 2006 by Tom Spitz Photography. All rights reserved.

Designed by Jessie McGrath

Edited by Ramona Cramer Tucker

Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture quotations are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version. NIV. Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations marked TLB are taken from The Living Bible, copyright 1971. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

To protect the privacy of those who have shared their stories with the author, some details and names have been changed.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Leman, Kevin.
7 things hell never tell you but you need to know / Kevin Leman.
p. cm.
Includes bibliographical references.
eBook ISBN 978-1-4143-2715-0
1. MenPsychology. 2. Man-woman relationships. I. Title. II. Title: Seven things hell never tell youbut you need to know.

HQ1090.L455 2007

155.332dc22 2006037588

13 12 11 10 09 08 07
7 6 5 4 3 2 1

This book is affectionately dedicated
to my favorite daughterthats what she calls herself
Hannah Elizabeth Leman.

Mom and I are so very proud of the young
woman you have become.
I love you.

Dad (and Mom, too)

CONTENTS

What a Man Really Craves

IT ONLY TAKES THREE THINGS TO SATISFY YOUR GUY. (HINT: THEY MAY NOT BE WHAT YOU THINK.)

Its Thursday, and Im out of words already. (But if you want to keep talking, honey, go ahead.)

Think of me as a four-year-old that shaves.

WHY BOYS NEVER REALLY DO QUITE GROW UP... AND WHY YOU WOULDNT WANT THEM TO.

I have a purple dining room, and I could care less!

WHY A MANS HOME IS REALLY NOT HIS CASTLE, AND WHY YOURE TEMPTED TO TURN HIM INTO A GIRLFRIEND.

Im desperate for you to need me.

IS YOUR GUY STARVING FOR ATTENTION... FROM YOU?

Ive thought about sex 33 times today, and its not even noon.

GUYS ARE WIRED DIFFERENTLY, AND FOR A VERY GOOD REASON!

I told you I didnt want to go!

WHAT YOUR MAN FEARS MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE... AND HOW YOU MAY BE DOING THAT VERY THING IN SUBTLE WAYS.

Id take a bullet for you.

WHY YOUR MAN LONGS NOT ONLY TO BE A HERO, BUT YOUR HERO.

Talking His Language

IF YOU UNDERSTAND HIS BASIC NEEDS AND TALK IN WAYS HE UNDERSTANDS, YOULL BE WELL ON YOUR WAY TO THE RELATIONSHIP OF YOUR DREAMS!

Running the Race... Together

YOUR MOST MEMORABLE MOMENTS ARE BEING FORMED RIGHT NOW.

by Dr. Kevin Leman

To my wonderful editor, Ramona Cramer Tucker.
Ive come to expect excellence from you, and you always deliver it
in such a professional manner. You are appreciated.

What a Man Really Craves

It only takes three things to satisfy your guy. (Hint: They may not be what you think.)

I LIKE BEING A MAN.

It takes a woman an hour or two to get her nails done at the salon. But I can do my nails at a red light in 10 seconds or less with my front teeth. I even make it a game to see how many times I can hit my speedometer with my fingernails.

(If youre saying, Eww, gross, youre definitely a woman. If you were a man, youd be saying, All right, score! Ive got a whole pile on my dashboard.)

I could wear the same pair of Bermuda shorts day in, day out. It would never dawn on me to change them, unless I saw another pair waiting for me on my bedroom chair... or unless my wife, Sande, handed a new pair to me, told me to put them on, and whisked the old pair off to the washer.

I think Im dressed up and ready for anything when my shirt has only one spot on it, and Im in my standard T-shirt, shorts, tennis shoes, and baseball cap. Its how I dress 95 percent of the time.

The other day, as I was taking my wife a cup of coffee in bed, as I do every morning, my daughter Krissy showed up with my two grandkids, Conner and Adeline. I was so excited to see them that I sloshed a few drops of coffee on the kitchen floor. So what did I do? I took my sneaker and rubbed the drops around on the floor a bit, so they would dry faster.

Daaad, Krissy said, rolling her eyes. That is so male.

And thats exactly what I am. A male.

I dont like to share my food with anybody. But I get first right of refusal on anything on Sandes plate.

I am as color-blind as anyone can get.

I never ask for directions.

I get antsy when you launch into a really long story. I cant help thinking, Whats the point?

Sometimes I act like a four-year-old who has to have everything now... including all of your attention. Other times I am my wifes hero.

When I say things, I mean them. I like to say what needs to be said plainly. But when Im quiet, Im hoping you get the drift that Im not crazy about what youre saying, but I dont want to hurt your feelings.

Im a tough guy... but Im tender underneath, especially where my family is concerned. (Just ask Krissy sometime how many times I cried when I found out she was engaged, when she tried on her wedding dress for the first time, when she walked down the aisle, when she told me she was pregnant with grandbabies one and two, and when I saw her holding those babies for the first time.)

Truth is, Im no big puzzle. And neither is any man. We men and Simple Simon have a lot in common. The path to our heart is well marked, but its also narrow, for there are few that we trust with it. Because for a guy, sharing your heart can be awfully risky.

FOR A GUY, SHARING YOUR HEART CAN BE AWFULLY RISKY.

If you have picked up this book, good for you. You care about the men in your life, and you want to improve your relationships with them. Whether you are married, living together, dating, engaged, looking for that special someone, or you simply want to understand a son, brother, or father better, 7 Things Hed Never Tell You will reveal the issues that are closest to a mans heart.

What makes a man tick.

What ticks him off.

And how you can have the most satisfying relationship with him possible.

When you date that special guy, youre always putting your best foot forward. Then you hook him, or he hooks you, and you decide youre both keepers. You want to be in this relationship for a lifetime. You cant wait to never have to say good night and drive off to separate locations ever again. You envision romantic evenings together, wrapped in each others arms, in front of the fireplace of your very own home.

Once the wedding is over, you concentrate on living life together. Settling into your careers, deciding who will do what around the house, who will keep track of the cars oil changes, pay the bills, etc. Somewhere in the midst of all this finagling is when you, a woman and a natural problem solver, get your first notion: I dont remember that bugging me before. Did he always do that? How can I stop him from doing that?

What you put into your marriage is what you get out of your marriage.