Paul Bahn - Dirty Diggers: Tales from the Archaeological Trenches

Archaeology is not a subject that is normally associated with humour, but Time Team and other shows have demonstrated that it is filled with colourful characters and eccentrics, and this was even more so in the past. In preparing this volume we contacted numerous friends and colleagues round the world, and received a few decidedly lugubrious and humourless responses! Fortunately, there are quite a few practitioners who have a good sense of humour, either at their own expense, or more usually at other peoples! A good number of them admitted to knowing stories which would be utterly unprintable for various reasons, and only to be told verbally, over a drink. To our great surprise, we were let down by Australian sources despite their reputation for wildness, while Russian colleagues insisted that their stories could not be translated!

One friend wrote: What a wild idea! Archaeologists are notoriously dull and unimaginative. How can any of em generate anything even approaching a smile, let alone laughter? Well, we hope that this little volume will prove beyond question that archaeologists do encounter a wide range of humorous situations while practising their arcane craft. As far as we know, all the tales presented here are true although, inevitably, with the passing years, some details will have been forgotten. Some facts get distorted, and some embellishment may well have crept in. But how can one know? And does it really matter? In many cases, anonymity has been necessary, when the subjects are still alive and/or somewhat sensitive about having their shortcomings aired in public!

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

For contributing material to this book, we are deeply grateful to: Mitch Allen, Jess Altuna, Nacho Ares, Rodrigo de Balbn, Gina Barnes, Fritz Berger, Caroline Bird, Jacques Blot, Gerhard Bosinski, Will Bowden, Peter Breunig, Luis Briones, Paul Brown, Peter Bullock, Eudald Carbonell, Dilip Chakrabarti, Shadreck Chirikure, Tony Christie, Trevor Cowie, Carol Demcak, Oliver Dickinson, Damir Dijakovic, Jon Driver, Phil Duke, Francesco dErrico, Dave Evans, Henri-Paul Francfort, Yossi Garfinkel, Yves Gauthier, Santiago Giraldo, Luz Gutirrez, Anthony Harding, Charlie Higham, Dirk Huyge, Anne-Sophie Hygen, Susan Johnston, Alice Kehoe, Jean-Nol Lamiable, Georgia Lee, the late Tony Legge, Serge Lematre, Tilman Lenssen-Erz, Jean-Loc Le Quellec, Malcolm Lillie, Enrique Lpez-Hurtado, Michel Lorblanchet, Rod Mackey, Consuelo Mata, Jane McIntosh, Chris Mee, Roger Mercer, Sidsel Millerstrom, Gina Muskett, Sarah Nelson, Dougald OReilly, Marcel Otte, Rog Palmer, Victor Paz, Dan Potts, Campbell Price, Gus Quinlan, Jos Miguel Ramirez, Chuck Riggs, Avraham Ronen, Anna Roosevelt, Jos Luis Sanchidrin, Dan Sandweiss, Tim Schadla-Hall, Jordi Serangeli, Gonen Sharon, Bryan Sitch, Lawrence Straus, Matthias Strecker, Peter Sweeney, Matt Symonds, Erik Trinkaus, Val Turner, Claudio Vita-Finzi, Don Whitcomb, Pat Winker, and Larry Zimmerman. For help with translations we thank Mary Jos Behrend and Conchita Garca. And many thanks to Mitch Allen of Left Coast Press for showing that some archaeological publishers too can have a sense of humour!

In re-excavating a ring cairn on the North York Moors, originally excavated in the 19th century by Canon Atkinson (of Forty Years in a Moorland Parish fame), the excavators came across a condom buried in the stones. Naturally they speculated as to whether the good canon had brought his lady parishioners up to the moors of an afternoon

There is a record of a pit that was excavated somewhere in Pennsylvania. A note recorded that someone had found a pit containing one douche bag and a leather boot! No further details are available, but the note did cause some interesting speculation

According to Claudio Vita Finzi, Beatrice de Cardi was asked by the Qatari authorities to explore the country for material for their new museum which was being built, and she created a small team which included me and my wife Penelope. We found heaps of stuff. One Neolithic site yielded arrowheads, ostrich egg shell, and a complete set of upper and lower dentures. All were bagged together and sent to the museum. We have not yet met anyone who can tell us how or whether the material was displayed.

During the excavation of the privy at a historic house site in Ontario, the excavators were well down into the historic loo when, in the words of Dougald OReilly, I dragged my trowel back and revealed a human eye staring up at me! Sparkling and blue, it was lifelike and I was a bit taken aback! We learned later that the owner of the home had a mother with a glass eye. How it got into the privy is a mystery, but one might speculate that the poor woman suffered constipation and lost her eye in her efforts!

A site containing Palaeolithic bifaces was holding up the work at the largest highway in Israel for two or three weeks (at the cost of thousands of shekels per day); but, after cleaning the section, the archaeologists encountered a layer with plastic pipes way below the bifaces!

Inevitably, archaeologists sometimes injure themselves, which is not, of course, usually a matter for hilarity unless they are particularly unpopular (as is often the case). But some anecdotes on this topic are worth relating.

On a dig in the American Southwest, at the great kiva in Morfield Canyon, a large number of people in a line were shovelling out a trench down to the floor of the big structure. One female digger, lacking sufficient control and/or strength, accidentally struck her neighbour across the forehead with a sharp shovel. The bleeding was profuse. She fainted!