Pfeiffer - Dude, youre a dad!: how to get (all of you) through your babys first year

Now that you are home from the hospital, things just got real. Remember all of the changes and challenges people have told you are coming? Well, they have arrived. So whether you find yourself totally accepting all of the major changes coming to your world, have totally put off thinking about these changes, or are totally terrified of whats coming, Dude, Youre a Dad! is going to try to get things moving forward as smoothly as possible. From the jump it will be important to be mindful of something: you are but one member of the team. The three of you are now tied together by the unseen (love, family) and all of you rise and fall together with the tide. If you experience success, you all share in it. The opposite is true as well. So whether the purchase of this book was a simple review of parenting basics or a cry for help, there is only one thing left to do: get down to business.

In a perfect world, you could handle everything that life throws at you with style and aplomb. You could sit behind your stately desk in your office and pass judgment on everything from that nights dinner menu to Saturdays proposed schedule with nothing but a thumbs up or thumbs down. In reality though, once you introduce children into your lives, chaos ensues. Maybe your BMP (baby-making partner, of course!) is out of town and junior wakes up sick. Hmmm. Looks like you better know how understanding your boss really is. But no matter the situation, it is time to redefine what control is and embrace the chaos that comes with being interdependent on other family members in your life.

What does this have to do with being a dad? The journey of fatherhood began at the fertilization of your BMPs egg learn more in Dude, Youre Gonna Be a Dad! Havent read it? Youre missing out! and has shifted into a whole new gear now that the baby is here. The type of father and partner that you decide to be will have a huge impact on the health and well-being of everyone in your family. And lots of the information and advice contained within these pages is going to have one of two common themes: 1) giving of yourself (which will be easier for some and harder for others) and 2) taking care of yourself. (If you do not take care of yourself, then the daily responsibilities you tackle each and every day will wear on you, and you will lose perspective.) But the simplest and best advice I can give you is to have a plan and stay informed.

As for the plan, whether you use a calendar that you drew with a crayon or a virtual calendar accessible from your phone, computer, and tablet, make sure that you have something to keep you straight and organized. Find something that works for you, that renews your spirit and drive every day, and keep to it. Some dads I know keep a detailed five-year plan. Others read daily inspirations to get their day started. And some are simply hanging on for dear life. As for the staying informed, you simply need to carve a few minutes of time out of your day to explore all of the information out there. Well, not all of it, as there is virtually a limitless number of books, websites, magazines, blogs, etc. to choose from (see the resource list at the back of the book for some info on where to start). Really what you need to do is consume, digest, and process. Take the information available, see if you think it is something you believe, and decide if you are going to incorporate it into your family life. I hope to help you achieve a strong first step toward these goals with this book. Yes, you will be giving lots of your time, emotional strength, and patience to your parental duties. But, whatever the method, you need to find a way to renew your strength and fervor to tackle the challenges headed your way. Yoga? Running? Meditation? Book club? I dont know what drives you, but find a positive outlet for yourself that renews your strength and energy. It will save you a lot of headaches, and potentially thousands in therapy. But with everything that will be happening in your world, you will need to find a system that works.

How are you to put all of this advice into practice? Throughout Dude, Youre a Dad!, youll find all the pertinent information you need to execute your parenting plan. In addition, youll find Crib Notes chapter summaries in case you need to go back in for a refresher course, quotes from famous parents to put things into perspective, and Its a Fact, Baby! sidebars that will help you learn important new baby trivia as you work your way through your babys first year. So put a fresh diaper on your child and brew a pot of coffee. Its time to start learning.