Susan Merrill - The Passionate Mom: Dare to Parent in Todays World

Praise for ThePassionateMom

Every mothers goal is to see her children fully blossom. In The Passionate Mom, Susan Merrill not only outlines the qualities women need to be successful moms, but also lays out a practical, biblical plan to help develop those qualities. She provides sound advice to help in the difficult task of raising children.

Lauren and Tony Dungy

Being a mother is the greatest joy of my life. My friend Susan Merrill regularly inspires me in my role as a mother. In her book, she will inspire you! The Passionate Mom is a book all mothers need to read. It will help each one become a better person and a better mother, no matter their childrens ages. I encourage all passionate moms to take the lessons learned here, and use them to lovingly guide their children.

Denise Jonas, mother of Kevin,

Joe, Nick, and Frankie Jonas

If you are looking for encouragement as a mom as well as some very practical help in being a mom, youve found it in The Passionate Mom. As a skilled mom of five, Susan knows the exhausting challenges that encompass being a mom and has masterfully woven her story, along with the timeless truths of Scripture to equip you and give you hope.

Dr. Dennis Rainey, host

of FamilyLife Today

Susan Merrill has done her homework, and the result is a book that will be a vital guide for me for the next ten years, as I try to navigate my kids through grade school, middle school, and high school and launch them into life. This book reaches mothers like me at both the heart level and the head level, showing us how to guide our children passionately and practically. You can tell Susan knows firsthand what it is to love your children so much, yet still wonder how to parent them best. This is a book that will truly help me say what I long to be able to say one day: Im not perfect, but I really did do my best.

Shaunti Feldhahn, social

researcher, national speaker, and

best-selling author of For Women Only

I have known Susan Merrill for many years, and I can tell you that she is the Passionate Mom! In this book, Susan shares her own stories as a momboth her successes and challenges. You find yourself able to answer one of your most important questions, Am I a good mom? With this handbook for mothering, you will have a plan in place and a road map in hand for passionately and confidently raising your child.

Walt Larimore, MD,

best-selling author of The Ultimate

Guys Body Book: Not-So-Stupid

Questions About Your Body and The

Ultimate Girls Body Book: Not-So-

Silly Questions About Your Body

Do you long to make every moment count? Want to be a purposeful mom? Do you desire to help your child succeed in this world? If your answer is yes to any of those questions, you need the words on these pages. Susan Merrill is a mom who gets it. Shes honest, wise, experienced, and offers practical strategies to help you be the intentional mom you want to be.

Jill Savage, founder and CEO of

Hearts at Home, author of nine books,

including No More Perfect Moms

As I have journeyed and fumbled my way through motherhood, there are few seasoned moms I have met along the way that I would love to sit for hours over coffee to engage in honest, authentic dialogue about the struggle to do what it takes to be passionate, loving moms. Susan Merrill is one of those rare and real women. This book flows not just out of head knowledge, but out of the soul of real parenting from the real trenches of Susans life. This is the kind of God-centered wisdom I cherish and seekwisdom that digs deep and inspires me to stay the course and to see Gods call on my life as a mom as sacred, focused, and set apart for the sake of my children.

Jane DeLaney, president

and founder of Emeals, Inc.

2013 by Susan B. Merrill

All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any meanselectronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, scanning, or otherexcept for brief quotations in critical reviews or articles, without the prior written permission of the publisher.

Published in Nashville, Tennessee, by Thomas Nelson. Thomas Nelson is a trademark of Thomas Nelson, Inc.

Thomas Nelson, Inc., titles may be purchased in bulk for educational, business, fund-raising, or sales promotional use. For information, please e-mail SpecialMarkets@ThomasNelson.com.

Unless otherwise indicated, Scripture quotations are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version, NIV. 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide. www.zondervan.com.

Scripture quotations marked NASB are taken from the NEW AMERICAN STANDARD BIBLE. The Lockman Foundation 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995. Used by permission.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Merrill, Susan, 1962

The passionate mom : dare to parent in todays world / Susan Merrill.

p. cm

Includes bibliographical references.

ISBN 978-1-59555-509-0

1. MothersReligious life. 2. MotherhoodReligious aspectsChristianity. I. Title.

BV4529.18.M47 2013

248.8431dc23 2012043387

Printed in the United States of America

13 14 15 16 17 18 RRD 6 5 4 3 2 1

For Megan, Emily, Hannah, Mark, and Grantyou are my favorite open door. I love you.

See, I have placed before you an open door that no

one can shut.

I know that you have little strength,

yet you have kept my word and have not denied my

name.

Revelations 3:8

Contents

Mom. Was there ever a job that encompassed so much, prompted so many questions, and created so many doubts in the minds of women?

What exactly is the job description for a mom? How can the job look so different from house to house, from culture to culture? Who is doing it right? Is there one right way, or many, depending on your childs personality, age, or environment? What if you have multiple children with diverse personalities? Should you parent them each differently under the same roofis that even possible?

I am a mom to five children. I have girls and boys, biological and adopted, strong willed and compliant, creative and analytical, introverted and extroverted. The combinations of children and situations a mom can have are endless. Your child may be completely different from your sisters daughter or your friends son, and therefore requires a different set of parenting skills. How do you know, with all the methods and advice, if you are parenting right? How can you be confident that you are being the best mom you can be for your children?

The question that most haunts me is, am I doing this right? At every stage of my childrens development, doubts about my parenting abilities have popped up in various forms. These doubts are daunting. They can easily discourage, intimidate, and overwhelm me. And the questions! Things like:

How long should I let her cry before I go in her room and pick her up for the fifth time tonight?

When should I send her to schooland to which school?

How do I teach character?

What should the consequences be for lying, arguing, or disobeying?

How much importance should I place on academics, sports, activities, and socializing?

Do they really need to do all that to get into college?

Am I really the only mom who wont let her kids see X, listen to Y, and have Z?

Am I being firm enough? Am I being too harsh?

Should I let her go? Is it safe?