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Tracy L. Barr - Adoption for Dummies

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You hear all sorts of things said or implied about adoption. Some information comes from people who know a lot about it, while some comes from people who dont know anything about it but make assumptions anyway. Some comes from people whose experiences have been good; some from those whose experiences have been bad. The result? Enough conflicting information to make your head spin.

So when everyone has an opinion and most of the books on the market deal with specific aspects on adoption or particular types of adoptions, where do you turn to for reliable information? Start with Adoption For Dummies.

The great thing about this guide is that you decide where to start and what to read. Its a reference you can jump into and out of at will. Just head to the table of contents or the index to find the information you want. Each part of Adoption For Dummies covers a particular aspect of adoption, including:

  • Answering the basic adoption questions How much does it cost? Whos involved? How long does it take? What do I need to know that I dont know to ask? And more.
  • Getting started and figuring out what steps you have to take.
  • Dealing with birthmothers and birthfathers and why, even though they may not be part of your life, theyre still important to you.
  • Confronting the issues adoptive families face issues from sharing the adoption story with your child, to answering your childs questions about his birthparents, to handling rude family members who treat your child differently than her cousins.
  • Finding help from books, resources, and support groups.
  • No adoption book at least no adoption book that you can carry around without a hydraulic lift can tell you everything there is to know about adoption. What Adoption For Dummies tells you is what you need to know, all in an easy-to-use reference.

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    Adoption For Dummies by Tracy Barr and Katrina Carlisle Adoption For - photo 1
    Adoption For Dummies

    by Tracy Barr and Katrina Carlisle

    Adoption For Dummies Published by Wiley Publishing Inc 111 River St - photo 2

    Adoption For Dummies

    Published by
    Wiley Publishing, Inc.
    111 River St.
    Hoboken, NJ 07030-5774
    www.wiley.com

    Copyright 2003 by Wiley Publishing, Inc., Indianapolis, Indiana

    Published by Wiley Publishing, Inc., Indianapolis, Indiana

    Published simultaneously in Canada

    No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, scanning, or otherwise, except as permitted under Sections 107 or 108 of the 1976 United States Copyright Act, without either the prior written permission of the Publisher, or authorization through payment of the appropriate per-copy fee to the Copyright Clearance Center, 222 Rosewood Drive, Danvers, MA 01923, 978-750-8400, fax 978-646-8700. Requests to the Publisher for permission should be addressed to the Legal Department, Wiley Publishing, Inc., 10475 Crosspoint Blvd., Indianapolis, IN 46256, 317-572-3447, fax 317-572-4447, or e-mail permcoordinator@wiley.com

    Trademarks: Wiley, the Wiley Publishing logo, For Dummies, the Dummies Man logo, A Reference for the Rest of Us!, The Dummies Way, Dummies Daily, The Fun and Easy Way, Dummies.com and related trade dress are trademarks or registered trademarks of John Wiley & Sons, Inc., and/or its affiliates. All other trademarks are the property of their respective owners. Wiley Publishing, Inc., is not associated with any product or vendor mentioned in this book.

    LIMIT OF LIABILITY/DISCLAIMER OF WARRANTY: While the publisher and author have used their best efforts in preparing this book, they make no representations or warranties with respect to the accuracy or completeness of the contents of this book and specifically disclaim any implied warranties of merchantability or fitness for a particular purpose. No warranty may be created or extended by sales representatives or written sales materials. The advice and strategies contained herein may not be suitable for your situation. You should consult with a professional where appropriate. Neither the publisher nor author shall be liable for any loss of profit or any other commercial damages, including but not limited to special, incidental, consequential, or other damages.

    For general information on our other products and services or to obtain technical support, please contact our Customer Care Department within the U.S. at 800-762-2974, outside the U.S. at 317-572-3993, or fax 317-572-4002.

    Wiley also publishes its books in a variety of electronic formats. Some content that appears in print may not be available in electronic books.

    Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data:

    Library of Congress Control Number: 2003105677

    ISBN: 0-7645-5488-3

    Manufactured in the United States of America

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    About the Authors

    Tracy Barr has been a part of the Dummies phenomenon for almost a decade. In that time, she has served as editor, editorial manager, writer, and consultant to the folks who write and edit For Dummies books. Most recently, she helped write World War II For Dummies with Keith D. Dickson, Latin For Dummies with Clifford Hull and Steven Perkins, and Religion For Dummies with Rabbi Marc Gellman and Monsignor Thomas Hartman. Her most challenging and rewarding role, however, is a personal one. She built her family through adoption and is the mother of four rambunctiously wonderful children. Her personal experience with adoption did not begin with her own children, however, but with her family of origin, which itself was built through adoption. As one of six children in an interracial family and as an adoptive mother, she is well aware of the issues that adoptees and their parents face.

    Katrina Carlisle, BSW, LSW, is currently the executive director of Coleman Adoption Services, Inc., in Indianapolis, Indiana. Her duties include providing direct services to birthparents prior to placement and post-placement, conducting home studies and post-placement supervision visits for adoptive parents, providing search and reunion services for adult adoptees and birthparents, and leading transracial adoption seminars and other types of community education. She has three years of experience as a social worker in adoption and child welfare agencies. Two of her four children were adopted.

    Dedication

    From Katrina: In loving memory of my son, Bryce Ryan Carlisle October 16, 1979November 23, 2000 Always remembered, forever loved

    From Tracy: To my husband, Larry, who has given my life happiness, and to my children Adam, Sarah, Mary, and Alex who have given it meaning.

    Acknowledgments

    From Katrina: I would like to thank the following people: My coauthor, Tracy, for asking me to do this project and then for having the patience to guide me through it. My husband, John, for his love and support in everything I do. My children, Derrick and Kara, for teaching me about adoption and allowing me to share their stories. My son Reid for understanding that his stories are not about adoption and, therefore, not in the book. My grandchildren for sharing their energy with me and my daughters-in-law for their encouragement. My mom and dad for their enthusiasm for this book and for telling everyone they know about it. My personal cheerleaders, Kenan and Mary. All my co-workers at Coleman Adoption Services, Inc., for believing in me and to all the wonderful birthmothers, adoptive parents, and adoptees who have taught me everything I know.

    From Tracy: I would like to thank the following people: My coauthor, Katrina, for trusting me when I said that, together, she and I could actually write this book. My husband, Larry, for his love, support, and too many other things to list here. My children, for interrupting me regularly enough to remind me exactly why I took on the task of writing this book. And the people in the family I grew up in: my parents, Lanny and Mary Carmichael; and my siblings, Kelly, Sandy, Billy, David, and Wendy, just because.

    From both authors: Several people helped create this book: Natasha Graf, Norm Crampton, Alissa Schwipps, and Tina Sims, the Wiley acquisitions and editing team that pulled everything together; Melitta Payne, of Bethany Christian Services, who graciously provided information on international adoptions; Kathy Gallop, of Lutheran Social Services, who took time from her busy schedule to read the manuscript and offer always helpful suggestions; and to all the people who shared their own adoption stories with us: Laura and Brian Allen, Sherry and Bill Frazer, Amy Young-Gray, Jon and Jennifer Kirkman, Charlotte Ottinger, Christine and Maurice Rembert, Leon and Tonna Thomas, Ilene Watson, and Carl and Vicki Witmer.

    Publishers Acknowledgments

    Were proud of this book; please send us your comments through our Dummies online registration form located at www.dummies.com/register/.

    Some of the people who helped bring this book to market include the following:

    Acquisitions, Editorial, and Media Development

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