Meredith Lane - Healing Your Inner Child With Affirmations

Introduction

M any psychologists believe that every adult has a child hidden inside him or her, an inner child, if you will, that lingers long after we grow up. Of course, we, as adults, look like adults, think like adults, and behave like adults. We may not be aware of the child inside us, or we may try to ignore it or repress it. But if we experienced a difficult childhoodperhaps we were physically or emotionally abused or neglected or subjected to harsh criticism or expectations we couldnt meet, or perhaps we were forced to grow up too fastour inner child may never have healed those hurts properly, even though our outward adult shows no visible signs of trauma. We may carry debilitating and false beliefs with us from childhoodthat theres something wrong with us, that we arent good enough, that were doing everything all wrong. These subconscious beliefs cause us to feel unfulfilled, to self-sabotage, to shy away from commitment and intimacy, to be overly critical of ourselves and others.

Of course, we can choose to ignore our inner child. That would be easier. But not best. Or we could (and do) scold our inner child, telling it to grow up, to behave itself, to do things right for once, to be better. If we listen, we will hear this type of scolding going on constantly in our psyche, but in a way that is totally counter-productive. An inner child that is hurt or that still needs a good deal of attention usually manifests itself in adult behavior patterns that are unhealthy or even destructive to ourselves and our relationships. Maybe we experience anxiety, or fear of commitment, or take out our frustrations on our loved ones. Maybe we have difficulty enjoying life, laughing, playing. Maybe we reject ourselves, because we learned a long time ago that we were not good enough.

This is wrong. Its no way to live. You are good enough. Your pain does not arise from any inadequacy that is fundamental to who you are as a person. Instead, it arises from the failure of your parents, caregivers, teachers, or even peers (intended or not, remember that these people are human beings too, certainly with their own unhealed pain and struggles) to properly nurture you when you were a child.

Working with an experienced counselor or therapist is an important way to finally make ourselves whole and begin to heal the pain still suffered by our inner child, but another critical step we can take is to practice affirmations. An affirmation is an affirmative statement that is carefully structured to address a negative pattern or thought and inject it was positivity. Affirmations have the ability to program our minds into believing the stated positive concept, in much the same way that we, as children, eventually accepted and believed the oft-repeated negative statements we received during childhood. These statements, good or bad, have a way of working their way into our subconscious mind and coloring every part of our psyche, and affirmations are a way of replacing the bad, hurtful, destructive statements with good, nurturing, and healing statements.

Affirmations are simply a way for you to affirm what is. There arent really any strict rules as to the method of performing affirmations. One can practice affirmations silently in the form of thoughts or meditation, verbally in the mirror, in writing, or even through audio or video recording, poetry, or artwork.

My favorite way to practice affirmations is to look into the mirror at my reflection, directly into my own eyes, and repeat the affirmations several times a day, using my own name in the first, second, and third person. For example: I love you, Meredith. Meredith is so loved. You are so loved, Meredith. Say it with as much conviction and joy as you can muster. Breathe into the affirmation as you repeat it. Feel it fill your whole body, from the top of your head down to the tips of your toes.

You can dedicate as much or as little time as you wish to practicing your affirmations, but remember that repetition is the key to getting the most benefit. Of course, different people will use the affirmations provided in this book differently. Some will choose a different affirmation every day. Some will practice several different affirmations a day. Some will find three or four affirmations that are particularly effective for that person and focus on those affirmations exclusively. Some will repeat four different affirmations fifty times per day. Some will repeat one affirmation three times per day. Some will write down the affirmations on index card or sticky notes and place them around the house. Do what works for you. Your goal is not to speed through these affirmations as if youre in a race to the finish. Rather, your goal is to heal and nurture your inner child so that you can finally achieve real peace and happiness.

Affirmations 1 - 30

1. Today is the best of my life and every day is a new today.
2. There is an infinite spiritual power within me, which protects me from illness, trauma, and danger.
3. I am worthy and always enough.
4. It is OK to accept compliments from others.
5. I am so loved.
6. I radiate peace and love out to others, helping them to be in peace and in love as well.
7. Now all my needs are met
8. I am capable and strong.
9. I have released my sad past. I live in the happy present and an even happier future awaits me.
10. I have the right and the responsibility to express my inner strength and beauty creatively.
11. I am totally, blissfully free of the influence of past trauma.
12. Others do not alter my perceptions.
13. It is OK to let others serve me.
14. All my relationships are loving and harmonious.
15. I open myself up to the healing powers of loving relationships.
16. I am so proud of myself, no matter what I do.
17. Life is full of joy.
18. The child in me and I are one. We love each other, care for each other, appreciate each other and will always belong to each other.
19. I am perfect, whole, and complete, just as I am.
20. I appreciate and accept myself.
21. My parents were once children who were programmed by their own parents, and I forgive them.
22. I am worth caring for.
23. It is OK to share with others about my personal accomplishments.