• Complain

Barbara Allan - Antiques Knock-Off

Here you can read online Barbara Allan - Antiques Knock-Off full text of the book (entire story) in english for free. Download pdf and epub, get meaning, cover and reviews about this ebook. year: 2011, publisher: Kensington Publishing Corporation, genre: Detective and thriller. Description of the work, (preface) as well as reviews are available. Best literature library LitArk.com created for fans of good reading and offers a wide selection of genres:

Romance novel Science fiction Adventure Detective Science History Home and family Prose Art Politics Computer Non-fiction Religion Business Children Humor

Choose a favorite category and find really read worthwhile books. Enjoy immersion in the world of imagination, feel the emotions of the characters or learn something new for yourself, make an fascinating discovery.

Barbara Allan Antiques Knock-Off

Antiques Knock-Off: summary, description and annotation

We offer to read an annotation, description, summary or preface (depends on what the author of the book "Antiques Knock-Off" wrote himself). If you haven't found the necessary information about the book — write in the comments, we will try to find it.

Barbara Allan: author's other books


Who wrote Antiques Knock-Off? Find out the surname, the name of the author of the book and a list of all author's works by series.

Antiques Knock-Off — read online for free the complete book (whole text) full work

Below is the text of the book, divided by pages. System saving the place of the last page read, allows you to conveniently read the book "Antiques Knock-Off" online for free, without having to search again every time where you left off. Put a bookmark, and you can go to the page where you finished reading at any time.

Light

Font size:

Reset

Interval:

Bookmark:

Make

ANTIQUES ROADKILL

ANTIQUES MAUL

ANTIQUES FLEE MARKET

ANTIQUES BIZARRE

ANTIQUES KNOCK-OFF

By Barbara Collins:

TOO MANY TOMCATS (short story collection)

By Barbara and Max Allan Collins:

REGENERATION

BOMBSHELL

MURDERHIS AND HERS (short story collection)

Antiques
Knock-Off

A Trash n Treasures Mystery

Barbara Allan

All copyrighted material within is Attributor Protected KENSINGTON BOOKS - photo 1


All copyrighted material within is
Attributor Protected.

KENSINGTON BOOKS are published by

Kensington Publishing Corp.
119 West 40th St.
New York, NY 10018

Copyright 2011 by Max Allan Collins and Barbara Collins

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any means without the prior written consent of the Publisher, excepting brief quotes used in reviews.

All Kensington titles, imprints, and distributed lines are available at special quantity discounts for bulk purchases for sales promotion, premiums, fund-raising, educational, or institutional use.

Special book excerpts or customized printings can also be created to fit specific needs. For details, write or phone the office of the Kensington Special Sales Manager: Attn. Special Sales Department. Kensington Publishing Corp., 119 West 40th St., New York, NY 10018. Phone: 1-800-221-2647.

Kensington and the K logo Reg. U.S. Pat. & TM Off.

Library of Congress Card Catalogue Number: 2010941089

eISBN-13: 978-0-7582-6830-3
eISBN-10: 0-7582-6830-0

First Hardcover Printing: March 2011

10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

Printed in the United States of America


In loving memory of William Louis Mull III

Contents


Brandys quote:

Stone walls do not a prison make,
nor iron bars a cage,
Minds innocent and quiet
take that for an hermitage.
Richard Lovelace

Mothers quote:

You can lock me up and throw away the key, but in my head Ill always be free.
Vivian Borne

I f you are in a bookstore reading this opening paragraph trying to decide - photo 2

I f you are in a bookstore, reading this opening paragraph, trying to decide whether or not to shell out your hard-earned money, you should know that I, Brandy Bornethirty-one, bottle blonde, divorced, who came running home last year to live with her bipolar mother am not perfect. I make my share of mistakes. Repeatedly. I am not always what you might call nice. Nobodys role model.

(Also, there will be parenthetical remarks. Ive been told the mark of a really bad writer is the overuse of parenthetical remarks. But you wouldnt know that, if I hadnt made a parenthetical remark just now.)

Therefore, I will understand if you replace this book on the shelf. One favor, please, if you dont make a purchase? Could you face the cover out? And, perhaps (if no clerks are lurking to catch you at it), move the book to a more prominent spot? Thank you.

So much has happened in the fourteen months since Ive been back in Serenity, a small Midwestern town nestled on a bend of the mighty Mississippi, that I hardly know where to begin. Actually, I began four books ago, but dont panicI can catch you up quickly, and those of you who have been with Mother and me from the beginning (God bless you, and no sneeze required) might appreciate a refresher.

Besides the several murder mysteries in which Mother and I got ourselves involved (Mother a willing participant, me not so), I had also received two disturbing anonymous letters.

The first claimed that my much-older sister, Peggy Sue who lives in a tonier part of townwas my birth mother; the other missive insisted that my biological father was none other than a certain United States senator.

After confronting Sis about these obnoxious notes, she confirmed that their contents were accurate, which put an added strain on our already strained relationship. But we both came to the conclusion that, for the present, we would keep these revelations to ourselves, and not disturb the status quo. Sis was to remain Sis, and Mother Mother which suited social-climbing Peggy Sue just fine. Me, I had my own reasons for keeping quiet, chief among them not disturbing an already plenty disturbed Mother, who had stopped taking her bipolar medication a few months ago.

We now return you to the regularly scheduled mystery novel (and there will be another mystery, and another murder, despite my best efforts otherwise).

Summer had once again arrived in Serenity, though it seemed something of a surprise after endless snow and then continual rain that had caused a flood from which our little community was still recovering. These were what we Midwesterners call the dog days: hot and humid, a literal pressure cookerwell, not a literal pressure cooker, but more than just a figurative one.

And while those with money fled north to Minnesota and Canada until the weather cooled off, we common folk holed up in air-conditioned houses, or malls, or movie theaters, venturing out only in the early-morning hours, or late evening, when the heat was barely tolerable.

At the moment, I was indoors, specifically upstairs in my bedroom, trying to find something to wear that was cool, and cool. Because being seven months pregnant during the summer was no picnic.

Oh! Didnt I mention that I was expecting? Sorry. Okay, just a little more catching up.

My best friend, Tina, couldnt have a baby with her husband, Kevin (because shed had cervical cancer), so I volunteered to be a surrogate mother for them. (Sometimes I am nice.) But dont worryIm not going to be all, Ooooh, my back hurts, and I gotta pee again, for three hundred pages. Nor will you have to encounter such verbs as trundled, or waddled. Youll hardly even know Im preggers. Just, when you picture meshoulder-length blond hair, blue-eyed, kinda prettydont forget to add a baby bump.

From my closet I selected an outfit Tina bought for mea Juicy Couture yellow sundress (from their maternity line) and a pair of orange Havaianas (flip-flops that Id always wanted but wouldnt buy myself because I couldnt pronounce them). You see, I figure if you dress right, people wont think trundle or waddle when you pass them on the street.

Sushi, my brown-and-white, blind, diabetic shih tzu (actually, my only shih tzu, and the only thing besides clothes that I slunk home with after the divorce) (Jake, twelve, was staying with his father in Chicago) (I warned you about the parentheticals) was on the floor a few feet away, attacking an old brown Brighton snakeskin belt as if it were a real reptile. I used the thing to keep her busy while I got dressed, otherwise shed drag out all my shoes from the closet. I would hide the belt in the bedroom for her to findwhich shed sniff out in a nano-second, even though she couldnt see it, having slobbered on the thing so much.

After checking myself out in the large round mirror of my Art Deco dressing table, feeling a pregnant woman of thirty-one had no right to look so cute, I scooped Sushi up and headed downstairs to find Mother.

This morning, we were taking in an antique mantel clock to be fixed; it was lovely but not keeping time. We had snagged the clock at a tag sale because the seller (an out-of-state relative of the deceased) didnt know its regional value and, naturally, we kept mum, as is the prerogative of any dealer (first rule of collecting).

Mother and I had a booth at the downtown antiques malllocated in a four-story Victorian brick building and we figured that once the clock had been cleaned and repaired, we could sell it for five times what we paid. Mother would take the lions share (or lionesss share) because she had spotted it first.

Next page
Light

Font size:

Reset

Interval:

Bookmark:

Make

Similar books «Antiques Knock-Off»

Look at similar books to Antiques Knock-Off. We have selected literature similar in name and meaning in the hope of providing readers with more options to find new, interesting, not yet read works.


Reviews about «Antiques Knock-Off»

Discussion, reviews of the book Antiques Knock-Off and just readers' own opinions. Leave your comments, write what you think about the work, its meaning or the main characters. Specify what exactly you liked and what you didn't like, and why you think so.