Terry Deary - Horrible Histories: Ruthless Romans

Romes history is in three parts really

• First there were Roman kings war leaders who went around smashing other people. Then the seventh king started smashing his own Roman people so
• Kings were thrown out and the people ruled themselves thats called a republic. But the Romans decided one strong leader was better for smashing other people so
• They created emperors with an empire which smashed everyone in sight and many who were out of sight too. It all started back in the distant mists of time in Italy

Killer kings timeline

1000 BC Rome begins as a collection of villages on seven hilltops near the River Tiber. They are on the hilltops because it is easier to defend them against enemies all around.

BC Romulus a reject from the nearby state of Alba Longa murders his twin brother, Remus, then marks out a boundary. This is a new town and I name it after er, me!

BC The seven villages all join together and build a meeting place a forum in one of the valleys between them and the seven villages become one city.

673642 BC Reign of Tullius Hostilius, third king of Rome. He sets about attacking neighbours Alba Longa.

642617 BC The fourth king, Ancus Marcius, makes the city bigger still, and builds the first bridge across the River Tiber. (That will come in very handy later for throwing people into the river.) He also builds Ostia at the mouth of that river to turn Rome into a seaport so the Romans can now massacre people on land and on the water.

BC Tarquinius Priscinus, becomes the fifth king of Rome. The Romans start to spread out and take over their local enemy city Alba Longa. Building starts on great temples and even greater sewers. (You cant make a big city without sewers.)

578535 BC The sixth king, Servius Tullius, enlarges the city by building a wall around it, five miles long with 19 gates. (Lots of ways out when it comes to getting rid of the corpses of dead Romans later.) And Servius has the first Roman coins stamped with his head on them.

535510 BC Reign of King Tarquin the Proud (posh name Tarquinius Superbus). Romans have now conquered about 350 square miles.

BC Wicked King Tarquin is thrown out of Rome and the city picks its own leaders it becomes a republic. But some people think there was no such person as Tarquin the Proud! He was just a made-up man a fairy tale to warn us about how evil kings can be.

Rotten Romulus and Remus

The legends say the terrible twins, Romulus and Remus, founded Rome in a wonderful (but wacky) way.

The boys were just babies in the state of Alba Longa when their wicked uncle decided to have them killed. They were put in a trough and thrown into the River Tiber. Luckily the trough floated till it was caught on a thorny bush and they landed safely. The lads were cared for by a wolf and a woodpecker.

Then they were rescued and raised by a shepherd. When the brothers grew up they returned to the thorn bush to set up a city. Romulus ploughed a line around the city boundary. And dont you dare cross it, Remus, he told his brother. So what did Remus do? Crossed it. What did Romulus do? Killed him. Problem solved.

Romulus was a bit short of women for his new city so he invited the Sabine people to a party and captured all their women for his men to marry. Another problem solved.

In the end Romulus disappeared in a storm and became a god!

Believe all that and you need a Roman woodpecker to peck some sense into your wooden head! But

Did you know?

The story of Romulus and Remus was not the story the Romans usually told their children about the making of Rome. The Romans liked to believe that the first Romans came from near Greece, after the battle of Troy.

You remember that tale? Where the Trojans were beaten by a wooden horse full of Greek soldiers (and probably a few Greek woodpeckers)? Well, some Trojans escaped. They were led into Italy by the hero, Aeneas, and they ended up starting the towns that became Rome.