Larson Peter - 10 great dates : connecting love, marriage, and fun on a budget

2014 by Peter Larson, Heather Larson, David Arp, and Claudia Arp

Published by Bethany House Publishers

11400 Hampshire Avenue South

Bloomington, Minnesota 55438

www.bethanyhouse.com

Bethany House Publishers is a division of

Baker Publishing Group, Grand Rapids, Michigan

www.bakerpublishinggroup.com

Ebook edition created 2014

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any meansfor example, electronic, photocopy, recordingwithout the prior written permission of the publisher. The only exception is brief quotations in printed reviews.

ISBN 978-1-4412-6439-8

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is on file at the Library of Congress, Washington, DC.

Unless otherwise indicated, Scripture quotations are from the Holy Bible, New International Version. NIV. Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide. www.zondervan.com.

Scripture quotations identified ESV are from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version (ESV), copyright 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved. ESV Text Edition: 2007.

Scripture quotations identified NLT are from the Holy Bible , New Living Translation, copyright 1996, 2004, 2007 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

Cover design by Greg Jackson, Thinkpen Design, Inc.

Authors are represented by WordServe Literary Group.

To couples everywhere
who want to add fun to their marriage
through Great Dates

Contents

Introduction

A recent conversation :

Question: Whats your favorite date?

Answer: You mean before we were married?

Question: No, whats your favorite date from the past couple of months?

Answer: [Silence, then...] We dont actually date. Were so busy, and its super expensive! Its just not easy to do.

If you can identify with this conversation, or if youre simply looking for ways to energize your relationship, weve got you covered. In the following pages we offer 52 Great Dates that are easy to pull off, easy to do (lots of tips and helps), and best of all, doable on a budget of $10 or less!

Think back to your initial dating days and why you dated each other in the first place. When we ask dating couples (the unmarried type) why they date, we hear comments like Because Im crazy about her. He makes me happy. I want our relationship to grow. I want to know her on a deeper level. Were really attracted to each other. Wouldnt it be great if married couples could tap into this same positive energy in an ongoing way? Dating on a regular basis is a fun way for couples to rejuvenate their love for each other.

We (the Arps) often say, Fun in marriage is serious business! Think about it: have you ever met a couple on the way to the divorce court who were having fun together? Dont think so! And how do you put more fun in your relationship? One way is by having regular date nights. Dates with a purpose. (Not just dinner and a movie.) Research reveals that dating can make a positive difference in a relationship. But heres the catch: predictable dinner-and-a-movie dates have less impact than dates that stretch you and take you out of your normal routine. New experiences help you bond together and often result in a big payoff for your marriage. But one of you needs to take the initiative!

Taking time and effort to initiate a date sends several powerful messages to your spouse. It communicates that you want to be together and that your spouse is worth the time, money, and effort involved. Most couples complain about overscheduled lives, so taking time for a date shows that you want to give your significant other your attention. With so many things competing for our time, dates rarely just happen naturally. A date communicates, I choose you as a priority, and I want to be intentional about nurturing our relationship.

We (the Larsons) can tell when it has been too long since weve been on a date. We begin to feel disconnected, and we function more like roommates than spouses. We become short with each other in the midst of our schedules, kids, and responsibilities. This general sense of distance and tension is a signal that we need time alone as a couple, time to reconnect. Maybe you can identify with us.

So, what makes a date great? No rules exist for what constitutes a successful date, but there are several common elements: quality time together, giving each of you a break from your normal routine, a shared activity, and conversation. Men tend to relax through doing an activity; women often relax by talking. So if your date includes both an activity and the opportunity to talk, youre on your way to a great date.

In the following pages, we offer you a variety of fun dates that include the above elements and will take you out of your norm. Unlike books you read from cover to cover, you can read this book spontaneously. Our dates are divided into eight sections, each offering a different type of date. Simply read the section that fits your mood, then choose your next Great Date from that section. (All dates should fit your $10 budget!) Youll find everything from Romantic Dates to The Great Outdoors Dates to Out-on-the-Town Dates.

With each date, you will find your own personal dating guide with Before Your Date suggestions as well as tips for your actual date in the On Your Date section. Weve included Talking Points that can be conversation starters and enhancers. And for each date we offer a Great Date Takeaway a thought to ponder and apply to your relationship. While most of the dates are fun and easy to pull off, some dates will take you deeper. Others require more energy and effort. Not all dates will appeal to you, so we give you permission to pick and choose what sounds fun to both of you.

We hope our dates will result in an experience of enjoyment and improved connection. Hopefully, they will lead to many meaningful conversations and enhance your communication, flexibility, and general sense of relational well-being. Now its time to make your marriage come alive with fun, laughter, and good times together! Enjoy your Great Dates!

At some point in your dating adventures, wed love to hear about your favorite fun and economical Great Date. You can reach us at www.facebook.com/10GreatDates or www.10greatdates.org, where youll also find more tips to energize your marriage, as well as information about other dating resources.

Out-of-Towners
Great Date

Recently Claudia and I (Dave) had houseguests, and, of course, living in the Washington, D.C., area, at the top of the agenda was seeing the sights. While we have lived here for a number of years, we always get a different perspective when we look at our hometown through the eyes of a tourist.

The Idea

On this date, you can be the out-of-towners and look at your own town through a tourist filter. Pretend this is your first visit. You may be amazed what you discover about your own stomping grounds and how fortunate you are to live so close to so many interesting sights.

Before Your Date

• Research your local area and discover fun things to do and free venues of interest.