Lexia - Gaslighting

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Gaslighting can be regarded as mental maltreatment. It can make a person question their capacity to see reality in an effective way. It can make you believe that you didnt hear what you think you heard, and you didnt perceive what you think you saw. You start contemplating whether you can have faith in the data that you get from your senses. It can make you imagine that there has to be a serious problem with you. You might even question your mental build-up.

The aim of this guidebook is to discuss gaslighting in detail so that you can recognize the same. You will also come across various tips and strategies that will help you deal with the problem. Gaslighting is a characteristic of narcissists who look out for recognition and consideration from others. It is a serious problem that needs to be dealt with using utmost care and consideration. As you get done with this guidebook, you will surely get to deal with gaslighters in the best possible way. You will also get to deal with narcissists so that you can protect yourself from their effects.

There are plenty of books on this subject on the market; thanks again for choosing this one! Every effort was made to ensure it is full of as much useful information as possible, please enjoy!

Gaslighting is a kind of manipulation that takes place mostly in abusive relationships. It is a covert and insidious kind of emotional abuse where the abuser or bully makes the victim question their reality and judgments. As a result, the gaslighting victim starts to think that they are slowly losing control of their sanity. Primarily, gaslighting can be found in romantic relationships. However, it is also not uncommon to be found among family members or in controlling friendships. Toxic individuals opt for such kinds of emotional abuse so that they exert control over other people. They tend to have the motive of manipulating family members, friends, and even their colleagues.

Gaslighting is a technique that can undermine the perception of the reality of a person. As someone gaslights you, you might start second-guessing your memories, yourself, and also all your perceptions. You are most likely to feel dazed and just keep wondering if something is wrong with you. It can make you feel confused besides making you question your mental sanity and your judgments. In such instances, it might be of great help if you can know in detail about the tactics of a person who tends to gaslight others.

There are certain things that can ensure a person is trying to gaslight you. Lets have a look at some of them so that you can be aware of the same.

All who get engaged in gaslighting are pathological and habitual liars. They can lie blatantly on your face and never change their stories or back down. It remains the same even when you provide the proofs for their deception or, as you call them out. The most common thing for them to say is, Stop making things up. Such things never even happened. So, it can be said that lying is the cornerstone of the destructive behavior of a gaslighter. Even at times when you are sure they are lying, such people might turn out to be very convincing. As a result, you will only start second-guessing yourself.

All those who gaslight are most likely to gossip or spread rumors about you to other people. They might act as if they are very worried regarding you, while they might tend to subtly tell others that you are crazy or emotionally unstable. Keep in mind that such kind of tactic might turn out to be quite effective. In fact, there are people who take the side of the bully or abuser without being aware of the entire story. Also, the bully might lie to you and make you believe that others also think the same regarding you. Such people will never say anything bad or disrespectful about you. But they will never lose a chance to make you believe what they say to others about you.

As you question, call or ask a gaslighter for something that they said or did, the chances are high that they will change the subject by asking questions in place of replying to the problem at hand. It will not only throw off our train of thought; however, it will also make you question the requirement to press some matter when the bully does not feel like answering or responding.

Trivializing all your emotions will permit the gaslighter to get control over you. They are most likely to make certain statements such as, You are overreacting, Calm down, or You are being overly sensitive. All such statements are powerful enough to minimize the way you feel or what you think and end up feeling that you are wrong. As you deal with a person who never tends to acknowledge your feelings, thoughts, or beliefs, you might start questioning yourself. There is more; you might never feel understood or validated, which might be quite hard to deal with.

Shifting blame is a very common tactic of gaslighting. No matter what kind of discussion you try to have, they get twisted somehow to a point where you get blamed for something that took place. Even at times when you make an effort to talk about how the behavior of the abuser makes you feel, gaslighters are powerful enough to twist the conversation. They can make you believe that you are the main cause of the bad behavior. They might also claim that if only you had behaved in a different way, they wouldnt have treated you the way they tend to do.

Abusers and bullies are experts in denying that they could do something incorrectly. They knowingly do this so that they can run away from taking charge of their poor choices. Such kind of denial can make the victim feel unheard, unseen, and also as if their impact on the abuser has no importance. Such a tactic can make it tough for a victim to heal from the abusiveness or bullying to move on.

At times, when questioned or called out, a gaslighter is most likely to opt for loving and kind words. They try to do so to smooth over the overall situation. They can say things like, You are aware of how much I care for you. I will never hurt you knowingly or on purpose. Such words might be the exact things you would like to hear. However, they cannot be regarded as authentic, specifically when the behavior gets repeated repeatedly. With that said, such people might be successful in convincing you to release them off the hook, which can be regarded as their primary motive or goal.

People who use gaslighting are most likely to tell the same stories repeatedly in ways that seem like being in their favor. For example, in case your loved one pushed you against the wall, and you try to discuss the issue later, they might try to twist the story and say that you tripped over. They were trying to stead you, which is why you fell into the wall. As a result, you might start doubting your memory of all that happened. Such kind of second-guessing or confusion on your part is all that they target for.