Anchal Seda - What Would the Aunties Say?: A brown girls guide to being yourself and living your best life

Anchal Seda

What Would the Aunties Say?

A brown girls guide to being yourself and living your best life

ANCHAL SEDA is a prolific social media content creator, presenter and culture champion based in London. With almost a decade spent in the beauty influencer industry, Anchal has singlehandedly built a unique and heart-warming brand that embodies everything it means to be a strong, ambitious, independent woman.

Anchal graduated from the University of Salford with a BA (Hons) in Special Efects and Media Makeup Artistry and moved on to creating inspiring and educational beauty content for makeup lovers around the world. Her platform has allowed her to work with the worlds most popular and reputable brands, such as MAC, LOral, Estee Lauder, NARS, Maybelline, the BBC, and many more.

Following on from her popular Brown Girl Confessions YouTube series, Anchal launched her podcast What Would The Aunties Say? to address taboo topics within South Asian culture that had personally impacted her life and were very close to her heart. It was featured in Spotifys best podcast of the week playlist and rated 5 stars on Apple Music. Every step and misstep along Anchals incredible journey has led her to begin an exciting new chapter as the author of her debut book, which shares the same title as her successful podcast.

www.SimonandSchuster.co.uk/Authors/Anchal-Seda

First published in Great Britain by Gallery Books UK, an imprint of

Simon & Schuster UK Ltd, 2021

Copyright Anchal Seda, 2021

Illustrations copyright Sookham Singh

The right of Anchal Seda to be identified as the author of this work has been asserted in accordance with the

Copyright, Designs and Patents Act, 1988.

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Simon & Schuster Australia, Sydney

Simon & Schuster India, New Delhi

The author and publishers have made all reasonable efforts to contact copyright-holders for permission, and apologise for any omissions or errors in the form of credits given. Corrections may be made to future printings.

A CIP catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library

Hardback ISBN: 978-1-3985-0560-5

Trade Paperback ISBN: 978-1-3985-0561-2

eBook ISBN: 978-1-3985-0562-9

For my three beautiful nieces: Diya, Riva & Saachi.

The future brown girls. I hope to be the Auntie you can forever turn to, to share your wildest moments with and not feel judged or scared. I promise to laugh with you, cry with you, gossip with you about boys, and help you pick outfits for your nights out, but more importantly, I promise to protect you. Ive got your back. I want you to know that you are loved, you are worthy, and you are more than capable to do anything you want to in life.

I love you more than words could ever describe.

Your Anchal Masi

Makeup artist turned author? Not something you see every day, I know. So, how did that happen, you ask?

Well, let me talk you through it.

My name is Anchal, and Im a British Indian girl, born and raised in London. (Im Punjabi, to be specific and believe me, Indian people always want to know the specifics!)

I come from a pretty large family. Im the youngest of three girls, and I also have a younger brother. My extended family is absolutely enormous, so I wont bother trying to list them all out. For a start, I dont think I could even count how many cousins I have. This is quite typical its considered a little strange if youre Indian and your family is small!

Growing up, it was all too easy to compare myself to my siblings. It could sometimes be very difficult, to tell you the truth. I wasnt the most academic student, which meant the path before me couldnt be defined by grades and exams.

I was always a much more creative person, wanting to spend my time doing practical things. I loved tasks where I could create something and see a finished product. I remember being very young when the first ever webcams came out, and my dad bought us one. I would record and host my own shows and casually force my brother to be a guest so I could interview someone.

At ten years old, I asked for a karaoke machine for my birthday. It was the most amazing karaoke ever: it had a CD and a tape player! Id play multiple characters on the microphone and get into serious debates with myself. Id record R&B songs on the cassettes and throw in music intervals true radio presenter style! There I was, with my very own one-girl radio show.

In most Indian families, the idea of pursuing something creative or artistic isnt generally encouraged or explored; in fact, its simply not understood. So, that creative route didnt feel like a realistic career option for me. Even considering it as a possibility seemed like a waste of time.

So, I tried to do what was expected of me. I tried to follow the respected and right path. I essentially forced myself through education, trying to mould myself into a person Im not.

But trying to be someone else never works for long, and one day, I just gave up. It was a relief not to have to pretend any more. At the same time, though, I had no plans of where to go next.

I really struggled to figure out what I wanted to do with my life, constantly asking myself, What are you good at?

My family would always tell me the same thing: that Im caring. Its true I do care about my friends and family, so much. So, I decided to start a nursing course. Thats a caring profession, not to mention one thats respected in the Indian community, so it had to be the path for me, right?

Unfortunately, I had no interest in it whatsoever. Its a wonderful profession, but its not who I am. I went into it because it seemed like the right thing on paper, not because it was right for me.

Then, one day, it happened. I was on a hospital placement and I quite literally had an epiphany.

Throughout the whole course that year, doing the placement was the best part for me (obviously, because it was practical). I remember they had put me on a mens gastro ward the least glamorous setting you could imagine. One old man couldnt feed himself breakfast, so I ofered to help. I sat there, feeding him his porridge, asking him about his tattoos, and he shared all his life stories with me.

But my mind couldnt help but wander. I stopped, and I looked around. I realised that, although this was something I could do for now, I couldnt see myself as a nurse for the next twenty, thirty, forty years.

I know how very silly and shallow it might sound, but I missed having my nails done. I missed putting makeup on. I missed the things that made me feel like me.

I thought about my mum and how shes so elegant (she really is #goals for me). I want to be like her when Im older beautiful, stylish and happy with who she is.

As I sat there listening to this very nice old man talk about his life, I wondered what I would say when looking back on my own life one day. Would I be proud, happy, satisfied or full of regrets for not having pursued a career I was genuinely enthusiastic about?

And it just came to me.

I decided, right then and there, that I wanted to become a makeup artist. It was what I genuinely loved doing. It involved people, which was important to me, but also let me exhibit my creative flair. Finally, Id found something that wholly suited me.