Gary Chapman - The Family Youve Always Wanted: Five Ways You Can Make It Happen

Ive been in the family business for more than thirty-five years. Not just my own family but thousands of others have walked through the doors of my office and expressed the joys and sorrows of family. Few things in life have as much potential for bringing us happiness as do family relationships. Conversely, few things can bring us as much pain as broken family relationships. I have heard literally thousands of women and men share their hearts desire for the family theyve always wanted.

But how, especially in todays culture, can we achieve that hearts desire?

In recent years, I have had a growing awareness that many in our day have no clear picture of a healthy family. They know the pain and problems of a dysfunctional family, but they do not know what a healthy family would look like. Thus, I felt compelled to write this book.

To say that the family in Western culture is in trouble is an understatement. It is more realistic to say that the family has lost its way. In our time the very definition of family has been challenged, as has the concept of the familyhusband, wife, usually childrenas the foundational building-block of society. The family has been bombarded with influences ranging from the lure of bigger, better, more to our cultures emphasis on personal happiness above all else. Young people forming families today often lack models for healthy relationships.

I have been a student of the family for more than forty years, beginning as a student of anthropology with a special emphasis on family structure. I have been at the business of helping people professionally with marriage and family struggles for more than thirty-five years. My wife, Karolyn, and I raised a son, Derek, and daughter, Shelley, both now grown with families of their own. Their influence and insights have added immeasurably to this book.

I have concluded that there are five elements essential to building a healthy family, so you will find this book divided into five sections that explore each of these. In addition, at the back you will find practical ideas for immediately applying these insights to your own familyto help you grow into the family you always wanted. What happens to your family will affect the nation, even the world, for better or for worse. We rise or fall together. I am open to your comments and hope that my thoughts are helpful to you.

G ARY C HAPMAN