Anne-Renee Testa - The Bully in Your Relationship: Stop Emotional Abuse and Get the Love You Deserve

THE BULLY IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP

Stop Emotional Abuse and Get the Love You Deserve

ANNE - RENE TESTA, PH. D.

Copyright 2007 by The McGraw-Hill Companies. All rights reserved. Manufactured in the United States of America. Except as permitted under the United States Copyright Act of 1976, no part of this publication may be reproduced or distributed in any form or by any means, or stored in a database or retrieval system, without the prior written permission of the publisher.

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To the millions of people who suffer emotional abuse and bullying in silence

I wish to acknowledge and thank the many people who helped me write this book and bring it to publication. I am indebted to my clients, who have had the courage to discuss their innermost feelings and work with me to change their lives for the better. Obviously, I do not name any of you in the book, because our professional relationship demands strict confidentiality. But I would be remiss not to thank you for your trust and the way you have responded to the method described in the book.

My literary agents at RLR Associates, Ltd.Gary Rosen, Jennifer Unter, and Tara Markassisted me in signing the publishing agreement with the McGraw-Hill Companies. I appreciate their wise counsel and the help they provided in every step along the way. Gary told me that there was no one better or brighter than senior editor John Aherne, who would head up the McGraw-Hill team. I quickly learned how true that is. John was enthusiastic about the project from the outset, and his expert judgment was invaluable. It was a great experience to work with him, and I thank him for that.

John Aherne's team at McGraw-Hill is exceptional. I especially appreciate the meticulous way Sarah Pelz edited the chapters for cohesion, clarity, and detail. Designer Tom Lau came up with that outstanding book jacket. Ann Pryor worked closely with me on publicity and marketing. I am grateful to her and the marketing teamSarah Love and Eileen Lamadore for coordinating an impressive program. The publishing process was enhanced by a remarkable staff, including exceptional supervision by project editor Craig Bolt.

I wish to acknowledge and thank Janet Roth and the late Gail North, who worked with me on the initial book proposal, and Marcy Posner, who initiated the contact with McGraw-Hill. During the writing and marketing process, I enjoyed the wise counsel of Karen Zahler and Pierre Lehu, literary professionals whose efforts on my behalf are continuing past the publication date.

I am fortunate to have many friends with whom I have discussed portions of the book and who provided ideas and comment for which I am most grateful. This is probably not a complete list, but I acknowledge and appreciate the contribution of the following persons: Mitchel Agoos, Bea Alda, Ernie Anastos, Emily Anton, Dr. Hugh Barber, Barbara M. Barbera, Heather Bauer, Lois Beekman, Joy Behar, Carol Berman, Howard Berman, Albert Bialek, Sheila Bialek, Linda Calder, Jim Chadlek, Claudia Chan, Tom Dunne, Jackie End, Lewis Frumkes, Steven Gaines, Ed Glavin, Nancy Grace, Tracey Greene, Bernard Grobart, Dr. Laurence J. Guido, Sophia Hall, Alice Harris, Stanley Harris, Tommy Hilfiger, Heather Hurtt, Victor Imbimbo, Linda Heller Kamm, Susan Kiel, Fay Kline, Richard Kline, Sister Margaret Ann Landry, Dr. Sharyn Lawall, Peter Lehu, Kay LeRoy, David Lubell, Tracey Lutz, Patty Marion, Morgan McGivern, Adriana McLaughlin, Ronnie Milo, Karen Par-zial, Maury Povich, Jule Ratner, Gary A. Rosen, Katheren Ryden, Randi Schatz, Len Scheer, Allison Winn Scotch, Dr. Thomas Sculco, Jackie Smaga, Gail Steinberg, Dr. Lucy Waletsky, Lisa Wassong, Kevin White, Dr. Donald Williams, Montel Williams, and Barbara and Donald Zucker.

It is not unusual today to communicate on the Internet with persons you have never met. Librarian Karin Suni, one such person on my list, has helped me with her ability to surf the Web and come up with the right answer to any question. Another person, who does not wish to be named, was really a collaborator who worked on the writing with me. While I am responsible for any errors in the book, I wish to acknowledge her major contribution, her talent, and her diligence.

Finally, I thank my wonderful familymy husband, Les Tanner; our children, Joy, Seth, Shari, and Jon; and my sister, Joan Testaall of whom gave me their love and encouragement. From the day we met and fell in love, Les and I have been each other's partner, best friend, and champion. Having Les at my side while writing this book made the experience special for both of us. My parents, Solomon and Gertrude Testa, are gone now, but I have my memories of the too-few years we were together as a family and sheltered by their love for each other and for my sister and me.