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M. V. Lee Badgett - When Gay People Get Married: What Happens When Societies Legalize Same-Sex Marriage

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Winner of the 2010 Distinguished Book Award from the American Psychological Associations 44th Division (the Society for the Psychological Study of Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Issues)
An in-depth, transnational primer on the current state of same-sex marriage post legalization
The summer of 2008 was the summer of love and commitment for gays and lesbians in the United States. Thousands of same-sex couples stood in line for wedding licenses all over California in the first few days after same-sex marriage was legalized. On the other side of the country, Massachusetts, the very first state to give gay couples marriage rights, took the last step to full equality by allowing same-sex couples from other states to marry there as well. These happy times for same-sex couples were the hallmark of true equality for some, yet others questioned whether the very bedrock of society was crumbling. What would this new step portend?
In order to find out the impact of same-sex marriage, M. V. Lee Badgett traveled to a land where it has been legal for same-sex couples to marry since 2001: the Netherlands. Badgett interviews gay couples to find out how this step has affected their lives. We learn about the often surprising changes to their relationships, the reactions of their families, and work colleagues. Moreover, Badgett is interested in the ways that the institution itself has been altered for the larger society. How has the concept of marriage changed? When Gay People Get Married gives readers a primer on the current state of the same-sex marriage debate, and a new way of framing the issue that provides valuable new insights into the political, social, and personal stakes involved.
The experiences of other countries and these pioneering American states serve as a crystal ball as we grapple with this polarizing issue in the American context. The evidence shows both that marriage changes gay people more than gay people change marriage, and that it is the most liberal countries and states making the first move to recognize gay couples. In the end, Badgett compellingly shows that allowing gay couples to marry does not destroy the institution of marriage and that many gay couples do benefit, in expected as well as surprising ways, from the legal, social, and political rights that the institution offers.

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About NYU Press
A publisher of original scholarship since its founding in 1916, New York University Press Produces more than 100 new books each year, with a backlist of 3,000 titles in print. Working across the humanities and social sciences, NYU Press has award-winning lists in sociology, law, cultural and American studies, religion, American history, anthropology, politics, criminology, media and communication, literary studies, and psychology.
When Gay People Get Married
M.V. Lee Badgett
When Gay People Get Married
What Happens When Societies Legalize Same-Sex Marriage
NEW YORK UNIVERSITY PRESS New York and London wwwnyupressorg 2009 by New York - photo 1
NEW YORK UNIVERSITY PRESS
New York and London
www.nyupress.org
2009 by New York University
All rights reserved
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Badgett, M. V. Lee (Mary Virginia Lee)
When gay people get married : what happens when societies
legalize same-sex marriage / M. V. Lee Badgett.
p. cm.
Includes bibliographical references and index.
ISBN-13: 9780814791141 (cl : alk. paper)
ISBN-10: 081479114X (cl : alk. paper)
1. Same-sex marriageLaw and legislation.
2. Gay couplesLegal status, laws, etc.
I. Title.
K699.B33 2009
346.0168dc22 2009003251
New York University Press books are printed on acid-free paper, and their binding materials are chosen for strength and durability. We strive to use environmentally responsible suppliers and materials to the greatest extent possible in publishing our books.
Manufactured in the United States of America
10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
This book is dedicated with love to my late parents, Bill and Betty
Badgett, whose marriage was the first one I studied, and to my wife,
Elizabeth Silver, who helps me put theory into practice
.
Contents
8 Strange Bedfellows: Assessing Alternatives to Marriage
Acknowledgments
Teachers rarely know what will stick in students minds, and sometimes it takes a long time to find out. This book had its origin two decades ago, when Professor Lloyd Ulman told me that I should do an international comparative study if I really wanted to understand institutions in the United States. I tucked that idea away and came back to it when I found the right one to study, so I owe him belated thanks for that sage advice, in addition to my gratitude for his support and guidance over the years.
I also learned about marriage from my friends and colleagues Leslie Whittington and Rhonda Williams, both of whom we lost too early. Their ideas and our conversations have inevitably worked their way into this book.
I owe an enormous debt of gratitude to many friends and colleagues over the years for their willingness to engage, correct, and improve my thinking and writing about marriage: Randy Albelda, Janis Bohan, Mary Bonauto, J. B. Collier, Mattias Duyves, Bill Eskridge, Nancy Folbre, Gary Gates, Gert Hekma, Mary King, Marieka Klawitter, Zak Kramer, Liz Kukura, Holning Lau, Toni Lester, Joya Misra, Lisa Moore, Torie Osborn, Jenny Pizer, Ingrid Robeyns, Adam Romero, Glenda Russell, Brad Sears, Evan Wolfson, and Doreena Wong.
In particular, I thank Todd Brower, Ellen Lewin, Jonathan Rauch, Elizabeth Silver, and the anonymous referees for their careful reading and feedback on chapter drafts. Their generous and insightful comments made this a better book.
I also thank several people who provided excellent assistance with the many research tasks needed to finish this project: Liz Kukura, Gail Wise, Amy Ferrer, Darcy Pottle, Naomi Goldberg, Chris Ramos, and Mandi Dove. Thanks to Martin Tulic for an excellent index.
I have been fortunate to work within three institutions that have made it possible to complete this project. I offer sincere thanks to the staff of the Williams Institute on Sexual Orientation Law and Public Policy at UCLA School of Law. I also thank the funders of the Williams Institute, particularly the Gill Foundation and the Evelyn and Walter Haas, Jr., Fund. For two years I had the time and resources I needed for my book research and, better yet, access to the best brains in the field of sexual orientation research. I am grateful to the economics department and to the Center for Public Policy and Administration at the University of Massachusetts Amherst for sabbatical and research support for this project. I also thank the participants in the lively yearlong seminar Marriage and Its Alternatives, which was part of the Interdisciplinary Seminar in the Humanities and Fine Arts at the University of Massachusetts Amherst. I appreciate the hospitality and support of the Amsterdam School for Social Science Research at the University of Amsterdam.
This book also benefited enormously from feedback I received at presentations and seminars in many contexts: the University of Linz, Stockholm University, the University of Amsterdam, the American Political Science Association, the International Association for Feminist Economics, Yale University, Yale Law School, the Center for Public Policy and Administration at UMass, The New School, the Association for Public Policy Analysis and Management, UCLA Law School, the UCLA Sociology Department, the University of Connecticut, the Tulsa Gay and Lesbian History Project, the National Council on Family Relations, and the American Psychological Association.
This book would not have been possible without the help of two groups of people: the Dutch couples who agreed to be interviewed and the people who helped me locate those couples. I am very grateful to Ingrid Robeyns, Gert Hekma, Mattias Duyves, Willem DeBlaauw, Yo DeBoer, Martha and Lin McDevitt-Pugh, and Gloria Wekker for their help with recruiting couples for this project. The couples in the study were remarkably generous to share their thoughts and experiences with me. I learned enormous amounts from them and hope that I did their stories justice in this book.
Finally, I would not have started or finished this book without the love and support of Elizabeth Silver, my wife in Massachusetts, Connecticut, the Netherlands, and everywhere else.
Permissions
Portions of appeared in an earlier form in two articles:
Will Providing Marriage Rights to Same-Sex Couples Undermine Heterosexual Marriage? Sexuality Research and Social Policy: Journal of NSRC, Vol. 1, No. 3, Sept. 2004, pp. 110.
Predicting Partnership Rights: Applying the European Experience to the United States, Yale Journal of Law and Feminism, Vol. 17, No. 1, Spring 2005, 71-88.
1
Introduction
A Different Perspective
The summer of 2008 was the summer of love and commitment for same-sex couples in the United States. Thousands of gay and lesbian couples stood in line for wedding licenses all over California in the first few days after that state opened marriage to same-sex couples. On the other side of the country, Massachusetts took the last step to full equality by allowing same-sex couples from other states to marry within its borders, in the very first state to give gay couples marriage rights.
I spent that summer traveling back and forth between California and Massachusetts, amazed at the transformation of the policy landscape between landmark court decisions in Massachusetts and California. Although I think of myself as an informed optimist, I must admit that this scenario in 2008 was almost unimaginable only a few years before.
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